Law # 48: The Global Readjustment Act
The massive law will realign the peoples of the world in such a way as to produce the worst combination of ethnic/national/political groups for a given set of jobs. For starters, we shall have:
- British chefs (bread and sugar anyone?)
- German comedians (you don't wanna know)
- French police (who alternate between ineffective and brutal, depending on when it is in history)
- Italian prime ministers (who cannot seem to escape scandal)
- Chinese human rights experts (this one explains itself)
- American brewers (at least for major American beer brands.)
- Indian car makers (unless you LIKE a breakdown every month)
- Japanese lawyers (an almost extinct race)
- Russian engineers (who produce death trap planes and low quality goods)
- Arabs who do anything but work in the oil industry (or terrorism)
- And Canadian... just Canadians (maybe they do ice hockey well)
No offense against any ethnic group is meant in any way shape or form by this law, under penalty of deportation to Mars. Furthermore, the following areas are to be changed:
- North Dakota and South Dakota are now just Dakota. Same thing with North and South Carolina.
- All of the states in New England are now just "New England."
- Greenland will have a million settlers shipped into it from Europe. Australia will have 50 million, half from Asia, half from Europe.
- Canada is to be given 100 million settlers from all over the world, or is else to be abandoned to the Eskimos. Alaska is to receive 15 million settlers, or it shall suffer the same fate.
- China is to be divided: Mongolia gets outer Mongolia, Manchuria and Tibet go free, Taiwan stays independent, and Western China north of Tibet is to made into a country called Turkestan. China proper is to be divided into North and South countries, each one with their own traditions and major cities; Beijing and Shanghai in the North, Hong Kong and Canton in the South.
And finally, a single world road shall be built, extending across all oceans, with rest stops at regular intervals, even in the middle of the sea, so that no citizen is EVER more than 30 minutes away from a McDonalds, Starbuck's, or Taco Bell.
