The Gang of Five

The Land Before Time => LBT Fanfiction => Topic started by: Fyn16 on October 06, 2016, 08:43:52 AM

Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 06, 2016, 08:43:52 AM
Hey all! I figured I'd give posting my work on here another shot, but since the formats don't translate too nicely from Fanfiction.net to here, I'm going to try this a different way. Each post will consist of a linked chapter and a short blurb about that chapter. This way, the format is preserved without errors. I'll be starting with the first chapter later today, hopefully with a few more to follow. If this works out, I'll continue it!

Synopsis: brother and sister Fyn and Zaura, two Amargasaurs living near the Big Water journey into the Mysterious Beyond following an age-old trail left by their father- a trail that supposedly leads to the mythical Great Valley, where dinosaurs once lived in harmony. Their trek takes them through the very heart of the Beyond, where forces beyond their understanding have been at work for years. Together with Sol the lone Longclaw, left to fend for himself at an early age, and Rear the dishonored Fast Biter clinging onto the last shred of her honor, they must unravel the dark secrets plaguing the Beyond, and work to finish what their father started when he ventured to the Great Valley so many years ago.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 06, 2016, 08:52:08 AM
Prologue and Chapter 1: Lessons

In a far corner of the Mysterious Beyond, on the shore of the Big water, lives a small community of curious Longnecks- a species collectively called the Sailnecks. Within this reclusive community, Fyn and Zaura, brother and sister, each have a busy day ahead of them, with Fyn being groomed to be the next herd leader despite his own apprehensions, and Zaura obligated to find a mate by her status as the current herd leader's daughter. Both must face the reality of the adult world they've just entered, and discover it's not quite what they'd expected.

Prologue (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/1/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)

Chapter 1: Lessons (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/2/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 06, 2016, 10:06:34 AM
A herd of Farwalkers comes to the grove, hoping for respite. What they find instead is animosity, yet both Fyn and Zaura are intrigued by the newcomers, and hatch a plan to help them.

Chapter 2: Outsiders (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/3/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 06, 2016, 11:59:38 AM
After finally meeting the Farwalkers face to face, both Fyn and Zaura come to realize that there is more to them, their lives, and the very world around them than they were told.

Chapter 3: Lands Afar (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/4/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 06, 2016, 12:03:03 PM
Caught in the act of helping the Farwalkers by Garas, Fyn must try to salvage the situation with what will easily be the most important talk of his life.


Chapter 4: Leaving the Nest (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/5/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 06, 2016, 02:35:38 PM
Book One: The Drylands

With a real herd to guide them, Fyn and Zaura find themselves in the Mysterious Beyond for the first time. As they set off on their journey, with only a story to guide them, they can scarcely imagine the wonders- and terrors- that await them in this most inhospitable of environments.

...

Having become part of a nomadic herd, Fyn and Zaura find they have much to learn about their new world. Together, they must adjust to the new climate, threats, and even their herd-mates, all the while searching for life-sustaining water in a hostile environment.

Chapter 4: Progress and Lack Thereof (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/6/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 06, 2016, 05:36:12 PM
The Sailneck siblings get a crash course in self-defense. Meanwhile, something begins to stalk the herd...

 Chapter 6: Face to Face (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/7/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: ADFan185 on October 07, 2016, 01:00:23 AM
It was a pretty decent chapter I liked it a lot.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 07, 2016, 02:32:27 PM
Thanks for the kind words, ADFan!

...

(Graphic Content Warning, applies to the next three or four chapters)

The herd comes upon a mysterious forest after finally reaching water. However, while they believe the forest to be their way out of the Dryland's dangers, their biggest perils have yet to reveal themselves.

Chapter 7: Into the Forest of Sand (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/8/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 07, 2016, 02:35:12 PM
Alone, afraid, and dejected, Fyn and Zaura find themselves separated from the herd. With Fyn's strange sleep stories beginning to torment him, Zaura must be the voice of reason to keep him grounded in reality. Unfortunately for them, the Fast Biters have not given up on their hunt yet.

Chapter 8: Alone (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/9/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 07, 2016, 02:37:22 PM
Plunged even further into peril by the Forest of Sand's dangerous terrain, Fyn and Zaura find help in a very unlikely ally, and just in time, too- for they soon find out that someone close is in desperate need of help.

Chapter 9: Rescue (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/10/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 07, 2016, 02:41:51 PM
The little herd of four has emerged bruised, battered, and triumphant from their fight with the Fast Biters. The pack, however, has yet to give up, and as they come closer to reaching the forest's end, the Fast Biter population at large begins to close in, tightening the noose and forcing the group to make some very difficult choices.

Chapter 10: The End of the Trail (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/11/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 07, 2016, 03:23:18 AM
In the wake of tragedy, tensions rise between the members of the small herd. Their goal is almost in sight, but the Fast Biter pack is closing in...

The Path Unclear (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/12/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 07, 2016, 03:25:58 AM
Book Two: A Threehorn, and a Quest.


A Delicate Balance (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/13/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 07, 2016, 01:34:16 PM
The exhausted trio of dinosaurs have, at long last, left the forest of sand. But new challenges await them in the mountains ahead. With Fyn badly hurt, they must seek refuge among a community of mountain-dwelling dinosaurs. Unfortunately, they may not take kindly to the presence of a Sharptooth in their midst...

Chapter 12: Shades of Sand (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/14/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 07, 2016, 01:36:48 PM
Sol is safe, out of the public eye. But his isolation comes with a price: hunger. Desperate, Sol finds himself looking for a way to satisfy his need for food. Help, however, comes from the most unlikely of places...

Chapter 13: On Matters of Diet (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/15/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 07, 2016, 01:40:24 PM
Rested and healed, Fyn and his friends must bring themselves to finally part with Rachi's herd. On the eve of their parting is a celebration none of the dinosaurs have ever experienced, and the stories shared within give the herd more knowledge about their destination than before.

Chapter 14: The Circle (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/16/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 07, 2016, 01:43:24 PM
The friends leave High Haven, knowing they must press on. As they move deeper into their mysterious new environment, however, both Sol and Rear begin to realize that they are far from being alone.

Chapter 15: The Climb Begins (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/17/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 07, 2016, 01:45:59 PM
High above the rest of the mountains, the herd is confronted by their first snowfall. Meanwhile, an old predator makes ready to reveal himself, while higher up the mountain, an interested third party watches intently.

Chapter 16: In the Giant's Shadow (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/18/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 07, 2016, 01:47:20 PM
Rescued by a mysterious Threehorn, the youngsters must come to terms with some revelations about their destination, their father, and even about themselves.

Chapter 17: One Eye (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/19/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 07, 2016, 01:50:15 PM
The group splits up to take on One Eye's task of tracking down Chomper. Friendly bonding ensues!

Chapter 18: Predator and Prey (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/20/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 07, 2016, 01:52:48 PM
Chomper's untimely and unexpected arrival makes trouble for our split groups. And to make matters worse, something dormant within the old Sharptooth's mind awakens, something which Chomper had long hoped was dead.

Chapter 19: Of Names and Enemies (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/21/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 07, 2016, 01:56:24 PM
Separated, the group must try to reunite, and continue their mission. Unbeknownst to them, however, their paths are spiraling more rapidly towards convergence than they are aware.

Separate Paths: Parts I-III below, in chronological order.

A Visitor of Most Mysterious Circumstance (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/22/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)

The Other (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/23/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)

Showdown (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/24/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 20, 2016, 12:58:36 AM
Everything comes spiraling to conclusion as each party comes closer and closer to reuniting. At the plateau under a fall of fresh snow, Chomper's and Cera's fate will be decided.

Chapter 23: Closure (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/25/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: ADFan185 on November 20, 2016, 01:09:22 AM
Awesome I'll read it later on today
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: vonboy on November 20, 2016, 01:45:12 AM
Really great chapter, Fyn! Loved Chomper and Cera coming to terms, and catching up on things. And it seems Sol's whole world is starting to fall apart around him. He's gotta let his secret out sooner or later, but it's gonna be a really tough pill for the others to swallow. Actually, there's a whole lot going on here, but that's mostly what interested me.

Anyway, looking forward to the next chapter. :D
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: ADFan185 on November 20, 2016, 08:06:56 AM
I read a little bit of it just now and it was pretty good
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on December 05, 2016, 10:00:26 PM
Book III: Prologue (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/26/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)

Let me tell you a story, Sol...
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on December 05, 2016, 10:02:34 PM
The herd of (technically) four comes across the first of three Oases described by Cera that lie within the scar, between them and the Valley. Initially, the place seems green and full of life, but looks can often be misleading...

Chapter 24: The Arrival (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/27/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)

Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: ADFan185 on December 06, 2016, 03:48:14 AM
Nice I'll read it later today
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on December 22, 2016, 02:57:22 AM
After meeting the residents of the first Oasis and hearing their story, Fyn hatches a daring plan of his own to prevent Cura from an untimely fate. Meanwhile, Zaura's presence draws some unexpected attention.

Chapter 25: A Proposition (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/28/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: ADFan185 on December 22, 2016, 09:36:28 AM
Sounds like a very good chapter looking forward to reading it
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Sovereign on December 22, 2016, 01:20:06 PM
Thus far we're still building the scene for the coming events but I must say that there is immense potential to build a worthy leg for the already-epic journey here. The Elders seem to have something strange going on as Fyn suspects and it'll be interesting what that'll be. I'm fairly positive that Fyn won't meet his end doing the crossing :lol so I'm looking forward to seeing what lurks in the river and how the Elders react to Fyn's (likely) success. I've found the beliefs of this new herd quite interesting and there's likely much more into the ritual and their legends than we know yet.

I understand that the Elders rule the herd with an iron fist but still the concept of Crossing is somewhat odd. Why do they have to cross the river at that exact spot and not further downstream, beyond the rapids or just walk around the lake? Possibly because of sharpteeth? It's just a minor detail but it bothered me a bit.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on December 22, 2016, 01:38:45 PM
Quote from: Sovereign,Dec 22 2016 on  12:20 PM


I understand that the Elders rule the herd with an iron fist but still the concept of Crossing is somewhat odd. Why do they have to cross the river at that exact spot and not further downstream, beyond the rapids or just walk around the lake? Possibly because of sharpteeth? It's just a minor detail but it bothered me a bit.
You're quite right of course, and this absurdity hasn't been lost on Fyn and Zaura either. This was something I struggled with a bit when setting up this section, and to be honest, I'm not entirely sure I've explained it as solidly as I'd like. One thing I looked to for inspiration (if you could call something as tragic as this "inspiration"), is the historical example of large groups of people, whether they be slaves, prisoners, or the like, refusing to rebel against their captors, even when they clearly have numbers on their side. In essence, like those people, these dinosaurs are held hostage by their fear, something you've probably realized by now that the Elders are capitalizing on. If the elders hadn't reacted so quickly, and told them that their safe crossing was decided by the stars, perhaps things might have turned out differently. Not to mention the fact that others have tried to make their crossings elsewhere. The fact that they go alone is their source of failure, and those that made it back alive have only bad things to say about the world outside the oasis. While it's certainly not the worst of it, this is still the Scar they're living in, and there's not much beyond the trees to support a herd of Camarasauruses.

So, to summarize, this is the only safe crossing within the Oasis. There are threats to either side that could be overcome with numbers, but the fear of death and the supernatural keeps the herd in check. This is further reinforced by the herd witnessing what they could only explain as a "miracle" during the first crossing, creating a state of borderline fanaticism. And, as you will soon see, the "unseen force" in the river is quite a bit more dangerous, stealthy, and persistent than a few crocs.

I probably should have explained all this better in my writing, though, and I'll strive to make sure the next few chapters clarify these points. Thanks for bringing it to my attention!
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: vonboy on December 22, 2016, 06:43:38 PM
With this longnecks and the river thing, I was kinda thinking back to another cult you had in one of your older LBT stories, where a dinosaur from a herd would be 'chosen' and have to wad out in a river to get snatched up by some underwater sharptooth. I don't realy remeber the specifics of it, but I remeber that part, at least.

So, I just thought you had a thing for death cults :p
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on December 22, 2016, 06:56:48 PM
Quote from: vonboy,Dec 22 2016 on  05:43 PM
With this longnecks and the river thing, I was kinda thinking back to another cult you had in one of your older LBT stories, where a dinosaur from a herd would be 'chosen' and have to wad out in a river to get snatched up by some underwater sharptooth. I don't realy remeber the specifics of it, but I remeber that part, at least.

So, I just thought you had a thing for death cults :p
Actually, I did draw some inspiration from that. But in this case, I decided to make the real threat one from within, rather than a standard predator oppressing prey. That being said, now that you mention it, I do seem to write about death cults a lot. I've been reading too much Stephen King...
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: ADFan185 on December 23, 2016, 03:51:59 AM
I'll readi it over the weekend end
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on January 06, 2017, 06:38:33 PM
The herd settles into their new, albeit temporary home. Sol finally meets his mentor face to face.

Gone Fishin' (https://m.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/29/)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Sovereign on January 07, 2017, 11:10:44 AM
It's already been a year since they left the Grove? A lot of time has passed after the last book... In any case, the first scene of the chapter was a decent one, showing the impasse Fyn and Zaura find themselves in. Cura's situation seems to be more complex than was initially shown and I'll look forward to seeing what it is. Sol's hesitancy to get up from the river was a funny touch in this scene.

It's nice to finally see Sol and Rear's full reconciliation, after all this time of pretending. The initial meeting was very believable and I liked Sol's way of handling the situation. It was a good idea to show Rear already knowing Sol's idea of repaying her teachings and his obliviousness about this. The whole sequence was written well and it was a great way to build a bond between the two. The half-eaten fish pretty much revealed that the "monster" in the river is some kind of sharptooth but all this hype about it has made me really curious about what danger lurks there.  :DD

Just asking, are spirits a general belief among Longclaws? I found Sol's readiness to accept Rear as a spirit quite interesting.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on January 07, 2017, 11:35:00 AM
It really depends on who you ask, I suppose. Thanks to Rhombus, I recently started watching the TV series, and have come up with a few conclusions of my own regarding dinosaur beliefs.

-Flyers clearly have their sun-worshiping system. That's an indisputable fact, at least in the Great Valley
-Longnecks seem to be religious, hold the stars in high regard, and have a rich history of folktales
-Threehorns are pretty much atheistic
-Most other leaf eaters tend to fall into one of the three previous camps
-Sharpteeth are a mystery, so I took some creative liberties with them. In this universe, they seem to oppose the idea of deities, but many like Rear value nature as a great being in and of itself.
-Sol's an interesting case due to his early abandonment. As a child, he would have been told scary stories about spirits, ghosts, things that go bump in the night, etc, but I never saw the Longclaws as having a belief system of their own (except possibly worshiping the river, their source of life, in some circumstances). Because of this, Sol grew up retaining his childhood beliefs, but as is soon to become evident, this lack of faith leads to a bit of a dilemma for someone who wants something to believe in, like his Longneck friends.

As for the time skip, there have been a few references to it throughout the story. It's implied that they left the Grove during the end of summer of the previous year. They met Cera in the fall and stayed with her through about half of winter. The journey to the scar is the longest time skip yet, taking them to the very beginning of Spring, so it's really a little over half a year.

Thanks as always for the insightful review, and I intend to put your points into consideration as the plot moves forward!
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on January 08, 2017, 06:49:55 PM
Thrum, thrum...

A Dream of Rainbows (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/30/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
(Not at all as pleasant as it sounds!)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Sovereign on January 10, 2017, 11:23:42 AM
All right... This chapter was pretty interesting. The start was great and the suspense in Fyn's dream was built very well. Apparently the rainbowfaces have a longer-term plan in the Valley. Chizel and Yal's characters were introduced pretty quickly but from what we've seen, they're quite decent. It seems that they have different views about Arden's deeds... I can see tension beginning to build among them concerning Fyn and Zaura's journey. I was wondering what you meant by "another presence" in the author's note of Closure.

I'm looking forward to seeing where things go from here concerning the rainbowfaces. I must say, they're the thing that I'm most worried about concerning this story. Of course it's just me but I'm usually afraid about things going too scifi-like with the rainbowfaces. But I'm confident there's nothing to be afraid about here. :)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: ADFan185 on January 10, 2017, 04:15:58 PM
I agree it was very good and very fun to read. I couldn't stop reading it it's that good. What a fantastic chapter it was. Can't wait to read the next one.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on January 15, 2017, 08:27:21 PM
Morning breaks upon the four travelers and their new charge. As the day begins, fate leads each one on his or her own unique path.

A Morning Walk (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/31/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Sovereign on January 17, 2017, 11:59:28 AM
"Zzzzztasty. Chew the bones, don't forget the head-"

He stopped listening.


That scene was hilarious. :DD Sol's subconscious seems to bear some very noble thoughts... Anyway, apart from that, this chapter started the day nicely. There are appearing more and more Dreamers and I cannot help but wonder what makes them that way. LBT 10 implicated all longnecks are Dreamers but that isn't the case here. I'm getting really curious about that... Carmas is "very smooth" in his attempts to get closer to Zaura and I cannot see their relationship ending on a positive note. It'll be interesting to see what Sol will find in the waters and what Rear's whole plan is.

Starwalk is a nice way to deepen the Longnecks' "religion". It seems the walk is rather long and holds many stops. The cleansing part begins this ritual rather well, paving way for a deeper look at their beliefs and traditions. The death cult apparently has developed an extensive network of different preparations for the coming death sentence while disguising it as a "divine quest" of sorts. We'll see what you have in mind but I'm rather sure it's something to look forward to.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on January 20, 2017, 02:47:39 AM
As the morning passes over into the afternoon, Fyn resumes his Starwalk, Zaura becomes acquainted with the herd's deputy, and Sol and Rear start to put their plan into action.

Touching the Stars (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/32/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: ADFan185 on January 20, 2017, 06:56:23 AM
The chapter was good and well written I'm interested in seeing what happens next.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Sovereign on January 22, 2017, 01:29:57 PM
I cannot help but applaud Zaura for coping with Carmas. That guy is so smooth in his overtures... Anyway, it's nice to see his character has other merits in addition to his will to court Zaura. It seems like the elders haven't managed to keep full control over the herd and there seems to be a distinct reason to keep him around. Zaura is getting far more patient than we saw her in the beginning of the story.

A herd of carnivorous fish as the Jaws of the River makes sense. It's still quite remarkable that they haven't been seen but there's probably a reason for that. Anyway, the scene of Sol escaping them was rather intense and undoubtedly horrifying experience. I'll look forward to seeing how this information will help Fyn.

As for the Starwalk, things are getting rather exciting.  The scene of Fyn seeing Cura talk to her parents was very interesting and deepened her character greatly. Even if there was nothing extraordinary(there could be, who knows?), the scene was a great idea and written just as well. As you said, the Starwalk is getting very interesting.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on January 23, 2017, 08:19:24 PM
Rear and a shell-shocked Sol have a heart-to-heart while Fyn finishes up the last leg of the Starwalk.

Stars and Their Complexities (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/33/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: ADFan185 on January 23, 2017, 08:50:45 PM
Awesome to see another chapter up
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Sovereign on January 28, 2017, 06:02:58 PM
I posted this review already on fanfiction but I figured I might as well put it in here also.


This just keeps getting better and better. Sol and Rear's conversation was written incredibly and it was an emotional dive into the duo's relationship. Even if the shown visions of afterlife mirror actual beliefs closely, they were transferred rather fluidly to suit the universe's needs. Sol's fear and Rear's way of reassuring him in that scene were spot-on. They way you create new aspects into the world while deepening the characters' relationships is awesome.

And the latter part of the chapter wasn't any worse. Fyn and Cura's relationship seems to be growing closer and Fyn's deep concern for her is a rather new characteristic. I have to wonder if Fyn actually had any hope that he was actually speaking to his parents or whether he saw the Starwalk as a mandatory ritual in the end. I'd say his opinion about it evolved during the day... And the role of the rainbowfaces in the whole Dreamer concept is thus far done cleverly. I would like to get the same answers Fyn looks for but that'll probably still take time :)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on January 29, 2017, 01:52:37 AM
It is now two days before Fyn's Crossing. long term plans are finally enacted, while unbeknownst to the little herd, a pair of visitors makes their way toward the Oasis.

Back to the River (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/34/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on January 30, 2017, 05:45:11 PM
Fyn and Cura finish their Dream while Sol and Zaura have a rather important talk.

Back to the Shore (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/35/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Sovereign on February 02, 2017, 04:16:20 PM
Three chapters this close to each other! Very nice...

First of all, I'm surprised and happy to see Cera and Chomper again! I had assumed that their part was over but I'm glad that I was wrong. I'm confident they'll bring up some interesting dynamics especially later on. Their meeting with Fyn and Cura was just great... using Adventuring was a priceless idea :) The rest of the scene was executed nicely and it established the two into Fyn's storyline and we'll see where that develops.

The Dreaming is getting very exciting. It must have been traumatic to Cura see everything they saw and I must say, that scene was very well done. Some parts of the mystery have been confirmed but the greater puzzle is getting thicker. I can't wait to see what happens during the next Dreaming! The mystery with the Valley is getting really intense.

The plan to distract the fish is underway. Unfortunately, I fear that the Crossing won't be that easy, especially so with the Elder's plan. They're truly living up to the praise they're giving credit in the herd(or not). The day of the Crossing is going to be a mess and most likely a bloody one.

The Sol/Zaura part escalated quickly. I must say, I hadn't really considered them prospective mates for obvious reasons. I'm still not convinced that would work but those prospects are ruined, perhaps for good. I really enjoyed the duo's antics and dialogue in Back to the Shore. Also, the Sol/Rear dialogue has been really good all the time, especially the last one brought new features from their personalities. As for Sol's revelation, the scene was just as sudden and confused as it had to. Sol's fear and Zaura's feeling of betrayal were tangible and I can only dread what Fyn will think of this development. I fear there might be an all-out conflict inside the small herd. At least Zaura and Sol's relationship has been ruined for the foreseeable future.

All in all, these three chapters were amazing! All of the main developments were meaningful and the future seems very interesting if concerning. I cannot even guess what to expect in the next chapter but you've certainly managed to make me hyped for it!
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on February 03, 2017, 10:51:56 AM
[[Content Warning]]

The following chapter contains graphic depictions of a violent nature and a particularly disturbing scene. For additional details, please see the Author's Warning at the chapter's beginning.

Carmas escorts Zaura to the white tree grove as Sol desperately searches for her to make amends. Meanwhile, Fyn and Cura begin their search for answers as they return once more to the valley with the red sky...

Shattered Dreams (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/37/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on February 22, 2017, 08:29:39 PM
In the wake of Carmas's vile act, Fyn, Sol, Rear, Cera, and Chomper must regroup and plan their next move, all the while preparing to perform the duty Fyn remains bound to: the Crossing.

Paths Diverge (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/38/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on August 15, 2017, 01:19:50 PM
The hour has arrived. With Zaura missing and little time to spare, Fyn and the others must finally cross the river, and meet the elders' machinations head-on.

The Crossing (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/39/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on August 15, 2017, 01:21:44 PM
As Zaura teeters closer and closer to the brink of death, help presents itself in the most unlikely of forms. Whether this help is willing to take on a dying dinosaur or not, however, is another matter entirely.

Winged Salvation (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/40/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on August 15, 2017, 01:23:36 PM
With a new herd and a new chance at life, Zaura must bring herself back to reality, while coping with the nightmarish murk of her fragmented memories. Meanwhile, Kotres prepares to move his herd out, and the concealed Sharpteeth must make a decision.

New Management (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/41/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on August 15, 2017, 01:25:33 PM
As the sun rises above an eerily silent Great Valley, two mysterious Rainbowfaces sneak into its walls, their motives unclear.

Thieves in Paradise (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/42/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on August 15, 2017, 01:28:50 PM
[[Content Warning]]
Graphic and disturbing depictions of hunting and Sharptooth-related violence within.

A pack of five young Allosaurs pursues their quarry as they make the final hunt that will grant them adulthood in a mysterious pride, the Pride of Stone. Unbeknownst to them, one of their ranks knows a great deal more about the pride then he lets on, and he has his own plans...

Hearts of Stone (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/43/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on October 13, 2017, 06:08:37 PM
Our scene opens with a return to Fyn, as he, Cura, and Cera struggle to overcome one of the Mysterious Beyond's greatest threats: nature itself!

The Scar (https://m.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/44/)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: rhombus on October 14, 2017, 01:20:47 AM
This is an excellent return to this story after a somewhat lengthy hiatus.  In it we quickly enter into an intense situation without much preamble, leaving the readers as surprised and overwhelmed as the characters in the story.  This is an excellent choice as it leads into one of the best pacings in a story I have seen in a long time.  9000 words without a letup in the suspense is one hell of an accomplishment.  This is not to mention the fact that the narrative actually made me wince when Fyn bit down upon his tongue.  A story that can make me sense the pain of the characters is a story that has succeeded completely in allowing me to suspend all disbelief.

The motivations of the sharptooth and his determination is well exhibited here, as is Fyn’s thought process.  Both his good strategizing and his tendency to overthink things.  Cera’s reactions, showing both humor and dismissal in the most trying of moments, is quite fitting as she is a threehorn.  Whereas I must admit that I truly felt for the sharptooth as he must have been starving to have focused on the hunt with such desperation.  The struggle between him and Fyn allowed us to focus much more on Fyn's development as a character and the sharpening of his thought process.  Only his empathy (from his experience with Sol) slightly slowed him from doing what he must do.

I look forward to seeing how things develop from here.  But as the echoes throughout this chapter indicate... Fyn is slowing walking towards and witnessing the rise of his destiny.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on November 21, 2017, 08:21:06 PM
Hey everyone, just popping in to let you know that I am not dead, and I am still working diligently on the next chapter! I plan to use an excerpt as my prompt response for this month, as school has been weighing really heavily on my schedule lately. Ideally, I'll be ready to post sometime this weekend. Hang in there, and to those of you whose stories I need to catch up on (looking at you, Sovereign  :smile ) I'll be reading them as soon as I can!
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on January 01, 2018, 05:04:34 PM
Fyn and company finally make their way down the cliff, but night brings with it uncertainty, and a new mystery to unravel.

Eyes in the Dark (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/45/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: rhombus on January 06, 2018, 03:36:10 AM
First, there is no need to apologize about the delay in updating.  I can certainly relate to the struggles of writing when work, family, and other obligations conspire around the holidays to eat up every spare moment of free time.  That being said, I am certainly glad to see this story resume.  :)

This chapter has presented us with several new developments, none of which are monumental in themselves (yet), but which hint at bigger developments yet to come.  The obvious deterioration in Cera's health has manifested in a hacking cough, which could be the harbinger of an infection or something much more dangerous.  Fyn's wise decision to take the lead on the rock situation shows that he is well aware of the concerning development.  Additionally his ability to use basic tool use to extricate the rock shows the clear influence of his father.  This serves as yet another bridge between the past and present (and future).

Which brings us to the Dream and its implications.  I have some theories about what may be developing which I will not blurt out, but I must admit the new developments both intrigue and mystify me (in a good way).  It seems that Chizel is being haunted by Arden, but it is left to us readers (for the moment anyway) to ascertain whether this is a true manifestation of the father through the son as Chizel believes, or an echo of a progeny taking up the cause of his father.  In either case, the implications of the Device and the mental connection between them all presents many interesting possibilities for the future.

Between the cute moments in this chapter, the foreboding hints of dangers and risks to come, and the re-appearance of plot points that are apparently about to manifest from mysteries into overt developments, this chapter was a joy to read.  :) I look forward to seeing how things develop from here.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on January 13, 2018, 01:19:13 AM
As a new day dawns, Fyn, Zaura, and Sol all prepare to face unique challenges, challenges which may thrust them over the precipice of adulthood faster than any of them may have imagined.

Three Thresholds (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/46/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: vonboy on January 13, 2018, 10:40:41 AM
Still following this,and looking forward to when Sol and Zaura finally face each other again. Should be crazy, with her wanting to start hunting sharpteeth now, and Sol going on his first hunt. Almost hope that they meet each other while they're doing these things, just to watch, and see if the trainwreck can be avoided or not. :P Don't know when you're planning on the meeting to take place, just speculating on my part.

Keep going, Fyn. :)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Sovereign on January 14, 2018, 10:30:44 AM
While this chapter certainly was a bit slower than the previous ones, I'd hardly call it a filler. This installment pushed Zaura and Sol/Rear storyline forward again after a small pause and it certainly managed to establish some nice and exciting possibilities for the next chapters. Zaura has found a new purpose for her life in the scouts and it certainly seems like things are going to heat up soon enough between her and the sharpteeth. Also, the opening scene emphasized a bit more about Cera/Fyn relationship and for some reason, I'm beginning to feel like Cera wants to pass on her knowledge to Fyn for a good yet worrying reason...

Zaura's new companions were fully introduced here and it seems like Zaura will be in good hands for now. However, it seems like she'll meet Sol faster than she perhaps intended or wanted as it's likely that they'll meet during the duo's hunt but I cannot say what will be the outcome of such a clash. Even if Sol managed to explain his case, it's doubtful the other scouts would approve of two sharpteeth tracking the herd, especially if they learn about Chomper's presence. The former lovebirds certainly are in for a sour reunion and one can only imagine what role the Smoothsnout Sharpteeth are going to play in it...

In any case, it's also nice to see these two group's storyline moving forward. While this may not be the most intense chapter, it was pleasant to read and it certainly got getting rolling on again. On a side note, I agree that setting a word goal for each day is quite useful as I usually strive for 2k per day and it feels like it works quite well! I certainly hope you'll keep this up as it'll be intriguing to see whether this mess can be resolved peacefully.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: rhombus on January 16, 2018, 09:51:08 PM
I most certainly would not call this chapter filler as it continues to develop the character of our three groups of dinosaurs, and establishes the struggles for them in the chapters to come.  Between Fyn's upcoming struggle to recruit and maintain a herd (with Cera's helpful and brutal commentary no doubt  :p ), Zaura's struggle to remember and understand her past experiences and reestablishing her dominance over herself and her destiny, and Sol's struggle to handle his first hunt, we have a lot going on in the near-future.

The events of this chapter do leave some rather concerning thoughts in my head though.  Among other things Cera's push to bestow her knowledge on Fyn, though not a new development, seems to have taken on a new intensity.  I am beginning to suspect that she thinks that her end might be coming in the near-future.  And, knowing Cera, she is thinking "I helped one flathead suck it up and do what was necessary, and I will help this flathead out as well."  :p And, of course, the potential collision of Sol and Zaura does not bode will for the future.  Sol is in for a rude awakening in the near-future, there can be no doubt about that.

I quite enjoyed this chapter despite the more mellow pace.  Sometimes a chapter like this is necessary in order to allow us readers to process the developing situations and to truly understand the struggles of the characters and their possible hidden motivations.  Nothing about this chapter felt slow or like filler, rather I always got the impression that it was building a foundation for what is yet to come.  And I look forward to seeing what that "yet to come" ends up being.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on January 19, 2018, 10:06:41 AM
Two challenges are met, two thresholds are crossed, and two young dinosaurs become their own adults as Sol conducts his first hunt, and Zaura gets to see the scouts in action.

Engage (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/47/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: rhombus on January 19, 2018, 11:12:30 AM
This chapter begins with a wonderful bit of misdirection that still provides us with great insights into far-walker society. As the reader considers the thoughts and ponderings of dinosaurs concerning stripecrawlers (which is great in terms of allowing the readers to think of dinosaurs as if they were like themselves, as we all ponder such things from time to time) before the life of the subject of such interest is suddenly cut short. This leads into a wonderful scene featuring the widejaws, which comes at a suitable time. And the shift in perspective to Acras is well-advised. Without knowing Osta’s thoughts it makes the entire situation even more horrifying.

I have little to say about the scene with Zaura's herd and Sol's hunt except to say that the interactions in both scenes were wonderfully done, and show how each is growing in unique ways. Additionally the misdirection (I thought that the herd was tracking Sol and Rear for several pages) was quite nice in building tension in the reader. This tension did not end when the misdirection was exposed, rather I feared for both of our protagonists. And then comes the conclusion...

And now Sol is a full sharptooth. One can only wonder how much of the original Sol will be left by the time Zaurua finds him, but then again, one can say the same of her. Their currents have diverged like tributaries serving different streams. And I suspect when they reemerge and face one another that they will be at cross-purposes. But, as Zaura would tell us, the only certainty in the near-future is blood and teeth. Whose blood and whose teeth is the ultimate question.

This was a great chapter that plays with the reader’s expectations while still providing the catharsis of action.  :)  In the end we have two characters fundamentally changed, each adapting to their herd or pack, and each awaiting a reunion that one thinks can only breed tragedy. But, as your writing has shown in this chapter, looks can be deceiving. And I hope for Zaura and Sol both that there is a reckoning that gives them each another chance.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Sovereign on January 20, 2018, 05:17:44 PM
This chapter elaborated really well which way Zaura and Sol's character developments are going to go in the aftermath of their separation. While their reunion will have to wait, this installment did a really nice job in building their motives and feelings in preparation for the coming ordeals while also widening our knowledge about Zaura's new companions.

It was nice to see Acras and his storyline again but even if we got hints about where his plot will go, it felt a little weird to have such a short scene about him at the beginning. Anyway, Zaura's part in this chapter was done slowly but it was more than necessary for us to know about her new role within the herd and to learn more about the other scouts. The sailneck's relationship with Trocha seems quite interesting as Zaura seems to genuinely her company but tries to keep her as a distant acquaintance in order to pursue her own violent goals. We'll see if anyone can prevent her from giving up to her inner rage of which we got a glimpse during the fight with the sharpteeth.

As for Sol, it's remarkable that he has taken another step towards embracing his fate (it was also a good moment to show your "love" towards Yellowbellies :lol ) but I see those experiences affect only his growing acceptance of the ways of the sharpteeth but it's likely that in the inside, he's still more faithful to his "old" self than Zaura.

Even then, I must say that some parts of this chapter felt a bit slow, especially in Zaura's section. It didn't distract me too greatly but it still felt like it could have been a bit more compact. However, I still found the developments here fascinating as they have the potential to have really profound consequences when our wayward main characters finally find each other again. Also, congratulations for breaking the 400k word mark! It's a really impressive milestone! :yes
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on February 14, 2018, 04:07:12 PM
Fyn makes his first attempt at convincing a few strangers to start a herd, and trouble brews in the Great Valley.

And the author makes some clarifications. That too.

A Lesson Learned (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/1/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Sovereign on February 17, 2018, 04:19:31 AM
Very nice job, once again. It's interesting to see some of the rainbowfaces starting to have second thoughts about their mission and their leader. You're doing a very good job in showing Yal and Cyrim's views on their situation and the Valley as a whole. The whole lead up to the inevitable confrontation between Locs and Tempa and the other rainbowfaces seems really intriguing and I'm rather positive that their next trip won't be quite as smooth or successful as the last ones. And when things begin to boil in the Valley, the storm most likely won't be far away from Fyn either...

Speaking of the sailneck, I loved the second part of the chapter. The way Fyn thinks like he already knows everything was shown believably and his quarrels with Cera and the domehead were really well written. It shows that while Fyn might want the best and he may actually be capable of achieving it, he still has to work on getting others to believe in him and understanding them in return. The way Cera pushed him to accept his mistakes was an extremely nice one as few people would be prepared to push him that far. Especially the scene in which Cera demands to know what Fyn was about to call her was a great one. Her understanding of Fyn's line of thought it really shows the depth of the wisdom the threehorn has gathered during her long years.

While this chapter didn't offer any great drama, it truly paved one for them. The Valley storyline seems to be on the verge of an explosion and slowly but surely, Fyn is starting to gather more people to share the coming storm with him. As for the ending, I second Spiritstrike in saying that the dream scenes are absolute gold. I can't wait to see what new mysteries are waiting to unfold themselves!
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on February 20, 2018, 03:32:03 PM
Once more, a Dream overtakes Fyn and Cura, but something is different about this one. Meanwhile, in the forest beyond, something stirs just out of sight...

Unwelcome (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11243456/49/To-Tread-Upon-Fields-Afar)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: rhombus on February 20, 2018, 03:37:23 PM
Yikes, I have fallen behind!  I will try to catch up after work today.  :yes
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: rhombus on February 21, 2018, 02:31:17 AM
This chapter starts off quite introspectively as we get a visual reference for how long Yal and the others have been in the valley.  13,000 tick marks, or 35 years.  An entire lifetime for even a long-lived dinosaur, and an entire portion of life for a modern human, but a mere mission for them.  A mission that seems certain to spell end for many on the planet they find themselves.  The threat directed at the two rainbowfaces we are acquainted with only further adds to the perceived tension, while at the same time making us feel for the story’s adversaries.  This is an amazing accomplishment for a mere two scenes, and as such I had to mention it here.

But on to the rest of the chapter…

Seeing Ruby (and her daughter) again was a treat.  It is nice to know that she is a conspirator with Locs and Tempa, and it actually fits her character quite well.  She was always a kind of diplomat of sorts, being sent into a valley that was distrustful of her kind and sharpteeth in order to protect her sharptooth friend.  It makes sense that she would again be in a similar position, appearing to scheme against the schemers as it were.  Though I can only imagine how old she is at this point.  She is probably the oldest of her kind.  I can only wonder if she and Chomper will be able to meet one final time before fate or time takes them both.

And now to the apex of the chapter… the herd-building scene.  I must admit that this went into a direction that I did not expect at all.  With the usual banter between Fyn and Cera, and especially her stern yet wise advise, I kind of expected this first attempt to not go to plan, but I did not see that this was intentional on her part.  However her reasoning in forcing this failure was a good one.  In order to build Fyn into the leader of dinosaurs he has to be he must first disavow himself of his old fixation on rights and wrongs, of duties and obligations.  Here in the Scar survival and needs governs all and if he is going to have order and respect in his herd then it will have to be provided, and earned, by him.  With this hard lesson now provided it will be interesting to see how Fyn does in his continued attempts to build a herd.

This was an awesome chapter that truly hints on what is to come.  Writing such as this really puts some of my attempts to shame, and it makes me want to read more and to see how the inevitable conflicts in the future finally play out.  But… I am afraid the next chapter’s review will have to wait until tomorrow as it is already late for me.  This was excellent Fyn, and I look forward to seeing what happens next!  :)
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: rhombus on February 21, 2018, 02:45:06 AM
Eh, screw it, who needs sleep anyway?  :p What this chapter lacked in length (by your standards) it more than made up for in its impact.  In this Dream Fyn now sees his clearest view of the valley, its history, and its mysterious destiny.  A destiny that it seems that only he can stop.  The visual description in this chapter is powerful as you describe him witnessing the coming and going of endless generations, the coming of the Five, then Seven, then Five again... and then the valley's end.  The final confrontation between Fyn and his adversary literally sent a shiver down my spine.  Now he knows that he is not dealing with Arden, but rather someone else.  And as if Fyn were unable to ignore the stakes before, now he cannot doubt the consequences of failure.  This is a battle for his world, and the fate of everyone on it will depend on him and his allies.

This is powerful stuff, Fyn, and my apologies if my somewhat tired brain is unable to adequately put my thoughts into words at the moment.  Between the events of the previous chapter and the foreboding tones of this dream I can only wait in anticipation for what happens next.  :yes  As you said in the previous chapter, shit is about to go down.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Sovereign on February 22, 2018, 10:57:21 AM
This certainly was a mysterious and thought-provoking installment. The developments that have happened in the Valley have, once again, been made clearer and not Fyn seems to have some kind of idea about what he is up against. Even then, the real mission of the rainbowfaces remains a mystery but the plot gets clearer, a bit by bit. Furthermore, the Dreams seem to be increasingly taking a toll on Cura and eventually also on Fyn.

The lead-up to the confrontation was amazingly written and one could really feel the depth of all the major events that have befallen upon the Valley. The tension in the air was clear and the cataclysmic event truly kept me at the edge of my seat. The final encounter in the dream was an interesting finish to this highly puzzling sight. What purpose does showing Arden's son the Valley's history serve, especially considering the rainbowfaces clearly don't want him anywhere near them? It certainly seems the rainbowfaces can't control whatever force is causing these Dreams.

And finally, those Dreams seem to be beginning to weigh on our protagonists more with every new vision. Fyn has to find a way to overcome the new challenges but I've got the feeling he cannot do it by himself. We'll see where he's going to find guidance on his path but I've got a feeling he'll meet certain rainbowface duo in the not-so-distant future. Other than that, it seems like the final battle lines are being drawn in the coming conflict. I'll certainly look forward to seeing which way this story will take in the next chapters.
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: Fyn16 on March 19, 2018, 01:25:07 PM
So, a little update here.

As most of you know, I've been writing quite a bit of "irl" fiction, or fiction that I can use to further my writing career outside of the fandom. As a result, this story has fallen to the wayside. I haven't lost interest, but it's clear that I have to shift my attention away for a while. As a result, I think I'll have to announce that I'm once more going on hiatus. I intend to make the most of this hiatus, however, by taking a different approach to this story until book IV.

There are two very distinct storylines right now, this much is clear, and I don't feel right jumping between the storylines at will. I'm currently toying with the idea of dividing the latter half of Book III into two distinct books, each one focusing on either Zaura's or Fyn's storylines. If I do this, there's a good chance I may write through the entirety of each book before posting it in individual chapters. I haven't decided if I will fully embrace this approach or not, but in either case, it will mean that I will be going off the grid for a while.

Thanks to all of you for your patience and loyal readership. I'll see you around, and I'll be sure to keep you posted as I move forward!

-Miles
Title: To Tread Upon Fields Afar (Updated)
Post by: rhombus on March 19, 2018, 02:23:42 PM
Thank you for the update and I certainly understand about your real-life obligations coming first as a priority.  :yes The issue of how to deal with multiple storylines occurring simultaneously is indeed a tricky problem, and I have encountered similar issues in "Mender's Tale".  Historian1912 and I have finally settled on an approach which focuses on one aspect (the present story) and incorporates the past scenes in set chunks, but it is still not a perfect solution.  Regardless of what you settle on for dealing with the multiple plotlines, I certainly look forward to the continuation of the story. :)