That's ok because you have enough of a comment to warrant a separate response
So let's break this down
I honestly don't know where to start so I guess I'll start by recognizing you for drawing a scene from my story. Any fanfic author would be happy to see their work of fiction illustrated, yep yep yep!!! 
Admittedly, as you being a first-time reader of the new, improved version of the story cannot know, this scene transpired a little... different than that haha but I do love your take on it!
As I quickly mentioned earlier today on Discord, this wasn't actually intended to be a scene from Shorty's Dark Past. I originally had the idea to draw Shorty meeting the hatchlings about halfway through the OC prompt and to better match the survival part of the prompt I chose to go with a similar style to LBT 1 (as you mentioned in the mood) with Shorty desperate to find food and stumbling upon the hatchlings who had gathered to this spot for food, but have now exhausted the remaining food that they can reach and afraid to go anywhere else.
I was pretty amazed when I read the first chapter of SDP and found that your descriptions mirrored my own thoughts as well, and the fact that you thought that this was a SDP drawing also is testament to that. I guess it's like how Bron said in 10: "Great minds think alike."
(though if you wanted to think like it was from SDP the hatchling on the bottom right could very well be Shadow, as she is literally stepping out of the shadows. I think that would be fitting, though she would have to appear a lot darker to fit her appearance)
Hatchlings: Generally, I think their proportions would make them tinysaurusses rather than hatchlings but I know how hard it is to draw a longneck with normal child-like proportions I'd probably expect them to be a little smaller than that. I think Littlefoot must've gained several times his size since he hatched...
This was an area I had trouble on for sure. I tried to use the flashback scene to get the general idea for proportions and while I think I have the general size right for, well probably only the bottom right one, the proportions are all similar to a Littlefoot sized longneck. Think back on it now I probably would have made the neck look considerably shorty to help with that.
About the individual expressions, I must say that you've drawn them really well with appropriate expressions. Though, I think the one on the right hiding behind that rock looks a little derpy around the face 
Well it wouldn't be one of my drawings if at least one character didn't look derpy
Coming up with different expressions for multiple characters is something I find to be quite fun but sometimes it can be hard to keep them all unique and a derpy one is bound to show up haha.
Background: This is possibly your best, most detailed background to date! It gives a rather realistic impression too! I am impressed I see you indicated a rough breeze judging by the way the few leaves are drawn. Maybe a few lines would have underlined that even more, dunno.
Yep I intended to have a breeze blowing the treestars and for 2 reasons. First, I had to have a reason for so little treestars on the tree since the hatchlings only could potentially reach the bottom. This also saves on effort to draw so many of them while also helping making the drawing appear less static. Second, there's a large imbalance in line density in this drawing with a very complicated, empty tree on the left with a largely more empty space on the right. When I generally look at a drawing my eyes are drawn to the complicated stuff, in this case the tree, so the treestars blowing to the right would help naturally bring the viewers' eyes over to the right (and to help make the space more interesting, I placed the sunset there along with some extra rocks in the sand dunes part).
As for your actual criticism here, I did actually try to do some things to try to indicate the wind but ultimately I don't think they turned out all that well. Right above the derpy hatchling is supposed to be a bit of sand blowing across the dirt. I probably could have done more with that and made it more prominent. I also shaded the desert part with long straight lines to try and give a sands blowing in the wind effect with more streaks on the right hand side of the hills to make them look less defined with the sand blowing over them. I mentioned this is my response to Sovereign and while I think it worked for making it look like a desert, it didn't turn out all to well for the wind.
That about sums up all of my thoughts on your comments. I must say, this was some good feedback that touched on some good points so thank you for your review! I guess that means we're both bad at getting around to looking at each others works. I'll try to poke you more like you do to me haha.
