(That's ok.)
"Shit, why is it that every plan I come up with has a disadvantage?! I just want my hair and opposable thumbs back! Not my human body!" says John as he exits the room, tackles an armed guard and bites his head off. "Wait a minute," says John as he notices an arm mounted minigun affixed to the guard's arm, "I might know of ONE weapon us RAPTORS can use to our advantage." John hits a green button on the side of the gun and the plastic zipstrap comes loose. John puts his hand inside and grasps the handle gently, then he hits the green button again, the strap tightens to fit the circumference of his arm. "You see, the armed mounted minigun is tightly stuck on to the shooter's arm, I can even let go of the handle and it won't fall off, and I just have to aim, and squeeze the whole handle. Max, you can cover us by crushing the guards flat.
(but at the beginning I already named the planet Alpha Centauri 4. I don't mean to be picky, I'm just saying the planet already has a name.)
In 2226, humans discovered the method of engineering new and unusual life forms through constructing amino acids in the John F. Kennedy labs on Alpha Centauri 4.