The Gang of Five
The Land Before Time => LBT Fanfiction => Topic started by: vonboy on February 19, 2014, 10:15:40 PM
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It was a hot, sunny, summer day in the mysterious Beyond. In a sparcily vegetated, frankly bare region, resided a nest. This nest was placed close to a watering hole, nestled in an area, sourrounded by a few small hills. In this nest lived three tyrannosaurus rexes. Two mates with a very young son. Today, the mother was pacing around the area, looking anxious.
What's taking him so long this time?" she thought to herself, before turning her interest to her son.
He was over by a huge, but mostly bare threehorn carcass. She had killed it, and dragged it back home to the nest for the family several days ago. Most all of the flesh had been cleaned off from it already, only little bits of it hanging here and there. Much too small for a gargantuan tyrannosaurus to even give a second thought to, but an enticing snack to a much smaller t-rex. He was struggling to get at a particularly juicy looking morsel suspended high above the ground, trying to climb his way from rib to rib to get at it, but tumbling down every time.
After a final fall, the young one kicked up some dust, stomped his foot a little in desperation, shook his head from realization, and finally started walking off. "Don't feel so discouraged, son. You'll be big enough one day." She tried to reassure her son. The large tyrannosaurus lowered her head down and motioned the little tike to hop on.
When she brought her head closer to the carcass, her son set there for a moment, building up his strength. He then leaped off from her mother's snout, caught the little morsel of meat in his jaws, and dragged it down with his weight to the ground below. She laughed while he feasted on the little hunk of flesh. "That's how do you it, son! Way to go!"
Her mind soon wondered back on her mate. What was he up to out there? It had been over a day since he had left on his latest hunt, and she was beginning to miss him. She missed getting to hunt together with her mate, but due to the new little bundle of joy, one of them always had to stay behind to watch out for him. Of course, he'll get bigger someday. They'll teach him the ways of their kind. How to hunt. How to provide for yourself, and also your family. She couldn't wait for the day all three of them could go out together. Just the three of them, against the whole world!
The smell from her mate filled her highly sensitive nostrils before she even saw him. The first thing she could pick out in the distance was a large mass moving slowly from the horizon, as if being dragged by someone else. As she focused on it some more, she realized what it was. My, he really outdid himself this time! she thought to herself. She instinctively called out to her son. "Come and look, little one!"
The child scrambled over by his mother, and looked off in the distance. "What, mother? I can't see anything!" He was still to small be able to look over the couple of small hills.
She gave a short laugh, before sticking her head back down, and motioning him to hop on again. "What do you see now, son?"
"Oh, it's daddy, isn't it? But what does he have with him? Never seen anything like that before."
"That's a longneck, dear."
"Oh, okay. M...Mom, what's a longneck?"
Another short laugh bellowed from her jaws. "Oh, that's right. You've never seen one before, haven't you?" Her son nodded. "Well, they have long necks, like their name implies, and they're big. VERY big!"
"Wow, it IS big! How did daddy even catch that!?"
"Well, it's very hard for just one sharptooth to take down such a big leafeater, but I'm sure daddy found a way. He's dragging it home now, isn't he?" She couldn't see her son's face, but she imagined it was full of wonder and excitement right now.
"What do they taste like, mom?"
"They taste Very good, dear!"
The next thing that happened was a little silly. The young sharptooth darted off towards his father, not realizing he was still on his mother's snout. He plummeted to the ground, alarming the larger beast.
"Son!"
The little one picked himself off of the ground, coughed a little, quickly called out "I'm fine!" before rushing off to his father again.
"Stay back, son!" This was his father calling out. He was dark purple in color. A Color most other sharpteeth would have laughed at, but she simply found it unique.
" Alright, time to eat, son!" she roared out.
"Yay, we're eating longneck tonight!"
"Oh, no, we aren't!"
"...what?" Was all that she could think of to say. What did her mate just tell her and their son?"
"It's Littlefoot!"
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So, here's a short fanfiction I'm working on. It'll only be a few parts long, but I'm sure you can guess where this is heading :DD
People's been telling me that I'm not descriptive enough in my writing, but with my more script-based writing style, that's much harder to do. So, I've had this little story idea rolling around in my head, and I decided to write it out. This first part is pretty short, but hopefully the next few parts will be longer. I'm hoping this helps me with be descriptive in my writing. Tell me what you think of it so far, I really wanna know! :DD
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A most promising beginning. :yes
I must say if your goal is to be more descriptive in your writing, then you have already succeeded in outdoing your script-based stories in terms of detail. As you mentioned in your author's note, it is quite difficult to convey highly descriptive details in a script-based format. With regards to everything else, I found nothing in this introductory chapter that seemed out of place. Your characterization of Mrs. Chomper and Chomp Jr. was quite nice. I can easily imagine Chomper's child becoming over-excited, forgetting where he is, and walking off of his mother's snout. :DD It seems that the kid inherited some his dad's personality traits.
I look forward to the future chapters, as I am curious to see how this develops. :)
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You did a good job, I think :)
The plot didn't just go straight but there were details and new actions one would not expect here and there. I have to agree with rhombus that the writing is descriptive :yes
And you sure know how to use cliffhangers :p I hope Littlefoot is alright and will not end as Littlefoot stew :blink:
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One of the things I like most about this is how you didn't reveal Chomper's identity until right at the end. It makes the revelation of Littlefoot just afterwards even more hard-hitting. :blink: The narrative of this flows really well as well, and its an envious plot and idea. :rolleyes:
I hope to see more of this!
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@Rhombus: Thanks for the encouragement! I'm trying to make him the little innocent type, like his father was when he was young. You can see where I'm going with this. :lol
@Ducky: It wasn't too confusing to follow, was it, David? Going from part to part might be kinda jarring, but I hope it's not too bad.
@Dosu2Dinner: Thanks, man! I'm really trying something different with this little story, as you'll see a little better in this next part.
Anyway, here's the second part. Enjoy! :DD
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"Listen to me, Chomper. You really want to deny us food? Deny your own son food?"
"Look, I'm not just going to turn my back on him like that."
"Then why did you bring him home in the first place, then!? Huh?"
"I just thought I'd be able to help him, you know. What was I supposed to do? Just leave him out there for some other sharptooth to feast on?"
"Believe it or not, I wouldn't have been HALF as pissed as I am now if you had just done that! What you're talking about right now, it's just... it's just absolute lunacy!'
"I have to try, I owe him that much, at least!"
"You blind fool!"
Arguing, arguing, and even more arguing.
That was all that he could hear that night. After his father had finally brought that huge longneck back to the nest, there was to be no feasting, and his mother was NOT happy about it. He wasn't either. His belly was still rumbling from lack of attention. That little bitty snack from before just wasn't enough.
He remembered his parents arguing before, over things such as whether they should follow a certain herd or not, or stay at this nesting area. This fight, however, was different. They were really at each others throats this time! He was expecting a nice little evening with his parents when he saw his father rolling in with that carcass, but right now, he was just all kinds of confused. Why did his parents have to be so hateful to each other like that? It made no sense to his innocent little mind.
He didn't want to focus on anymore arguing, so he instead turned his attention back to that carcass, and his belly. He noticed a decent sized gash on the side of the beast, closer to it's backbone. A small bit of flesh was just hanging there, ripped up in the attack, but still just barely hanging on. This little bit looked like it would be delicious, so he decided to go after it.
He came up to the side of the creature, and tried to claw himself up. This was nigh impossible however. His tiny, underdeveloped claws were sharp, yes, but still much to small to even dig into the thick hide for a grip.
He then tried getting his parent's attention. He made a few squeaks and calls. Neither responded, still too enveloped in their little argument. Next up he approached to his mother, and brought his body up to her leg.
"What is it, baby?"
"Mommy, I'm hungry!"
"I am too, dear. Your father is just being a huge ass right now."
"I'm being the ass?"
"Speaking matter of factly, you are. Trying to save that longneck just makes no sense! It'd be better just to eat it!"
"Oh, it's alright. Just turn on your friends. That's the way to live life! You really wanna raise our son like that!?"
...And here they go again. Right back to their argument, much to his displeasure. The little biter left them in frustration. Standing before the kill again, he decided he was going to have to solve this problem himself. Looking around, he noticed the creature's long tail, laying out like a gradual staircase. of course! he thought to himself. I can just climb up that tail!
Taking the little trek up the tail, he was starting to close in on his prize, but something caught him off guard. The ground was moving! What's going on, here!? he thought in a panic. Looking around at his surroundings, he saw the skyward-facing side of the longenck he was standing on was moving up and down slowly. This longneck is still breathing? It's still alive!? What was going on here? Perhaps his father had just forgotten to kill his prey. Forgot to check if the giant mass of flesh he was dragging back to then nest was still breathing. Wait, that's just silly! How could daddy make a big mistake like that? This reasoning on his part did not last long, though, as his hunger was getting the better of him.
He trotted over to the exposed hunk of flesh, a light trail of drool left behind in his wake. Taking in one last whiff, he took a bite of the meat. Amazing! Even better than mother said it would be! His hard work had paid off! He took in another bite from the orphaned hunk of flesh, and it seemed to taste better than the first bite! Why was this so good? Was it just because it was so fresh? He had little time to explore this thought, as a deafening, bloodcurdling roar took him off guard.
"Get off of him, NOW!!!"
He froze in fear for a second, then looked up. His father was standing right in front of him, barred teeth, claws at the ready, and with murder in his eyes.
"...Daddy?"
"I said get off!"
Not knowing anything else he could do, he lept off of the longneck, and went straight out of the nest, as fast as his stompers could take him. He ran for a few minutes, but it seemed much longer than that to him. Entering a small forest, he laid his head down on a small, flat rock, sobbing to himself. He sat there, wallowing in fear and confusion, when a familiar voice entered his ears.
"Hey there, buddy. Are you alright?"
He rubbed some tears from his eyes. trying to get a grip on himself.
"It's okay, Rex. Just tell me what's wrong. I hate to see a friend so upset."
He looked over to the dinosaur that was staring at him from the side. It was a very young Iguanodon, light, faded out green in color. Almost a little brown. His eyes were full of emotion, too, but it wasn't of fear. They were full of concern. This leafeater didn't act like he was staring at a predator at all.
"I'm sorry, Guaro. Didn't mean to scare you."
"Haha! Well, you running in here so fast would probably scare anyone! But, what's up? Did something happen?"
"Oh, it's my parents."
"Your... parents?"
"Yeah, they're really mad at me right now. Well, my dad is anyway."
"Is it me?"
"What? No, it's not you. Why would he be angry at you? He was just so angry at me when I was eating that longneck."
The leaf-eater's eyes shot wide open.
"You were eating a longneck?"
"Yeah. My daddy brought it home, so I started to eat some. Daddy REALLY didn't want me to eat any, though."
"That's... interesting."
"Why do you think he wouldn't want me to have some?"
His mind was just blank. His dad had always let him eat from his kills before. Maybe his dad wanted it all to himself?
"I don't really know, Rex. Maybe that longneck was sick, and it'd make you sick if you ate it?"
"I don't know, maybe."
"Anyway, I don't really see how I can help you with that. You'll just have to go talk to you're folks about it. In the meantime, I'll just try to catch something to eat myself."
"That's okay. I think I feel better just talking to someone about it. Thanks"
His friend gave his goodbyes for the day, but he wasn't paying much attention to him. The little predator left his friend, and trekked all the way back to his nest. What he saw was a tad confusing. His mother was fast asleep, probably too tired from all of the arguing, but his father was still very much wide awake. He was laying down, with his back facing the longneck. His eyes were wide open, observing his surroundings, trying to protect... something. Rex brought himself before his father, with more questioning and confused eyes.
"Why are you so mad at me, daddy? What did I do wrong?"
His father's eyes suddenly softened up. They watered up a bit, as he brought his head down into his small claws to weep.
"It's... not your fault, son. I just... I don't know what got into me."
The massive beast extended his claws out. "Come here, son."
The little one complied. After nestling in his father warm embrace, he asked his father another question.
"Daddy? Why aren't we eating the longneck?"
"Well, he's my friend. I don't want to eat him."
"You're friends with a leafeater? That's just silly!"
"I guess it is a little silly, in a way, but I'm doing it already. Kinda late to stop now, isn't it? You have any leafeater friends, son?"
Rex thought back to the Iguanodon he just spoke to earlier.
"Nope, just this sharptooth friend."
"I still wanna see this friend of yours, son."
"He doesn't want to see you, though."
"Really? That's odd." His father shifted his weight a bit, probably to get more comfertable. "Maybe he's just shy or something."
The little biter just couldn't hold back a yawn.
"You should probably be going to sleep, little one."
"Can I sleep with you tonight? Here?"
"I guess it's alright. You're already here, aren't you?"
Rex couldn't keep his eyes open any longer. He drifted off into a deep sleep.
His father didn't sleep a wink...
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It seems that Littlefoot's arrival has caused some major domestic strife between Chomper and the misses. I wonder if Chomper ever told her about his friendship with Littlefoot prior to this unexpected reunion? If not, then that is quite a bit to chew on :p and probably too strange of an idea for her to accept.
Also in this chapter we get to see that Chomper Jr. seems to be more like his father than he might suspect. Not only is he innocent and excitable, but he also has found himself a leafeater friend, an Iguanodon no less. It will be interesting to see how this turns out. :yes
There is only one thing that I noticed that stood out to me. It isn't a mistake, per se, but the word choice could be changed I think:
"Anyway, I don't really see how I can help you with that. You'll just have to go talk to you're folks about it. In the meantime, I'll just try to catch something to eat myself."
I think that the Iguanodon would probably say "I'll just try to find something to eat myself." as he wouldn't need to chase down his food, since his food would be plant material.
Other than that, however, I didn't notice any problems. Your writing is descriptive enough to effectively portray the emotions and motivations of the characters, but not overly verbose that it detracts from the flow of the story. I look forward to the next chapter. :yes
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This is interesting... :lol
Chomper must be weird in the eyes of his wife... and Rex got himself a little leafeater... not for dinner though... yet :p I'm really curious how their friendship is going to develop!
Having a piece of flesh eaten by a young biter, must be as bad for Littlefoot as a mosquito bite is for a human :p Considering his size as an adult...
About your little correction, rhombus: I do know why vonboy wrote "catch" but I will leave it to him whether to reveal it yet or not :yes
Looking forward to reading the next one :smile Keep up the good work!
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Thanks for the feedback, Guys!
@Rhombus: About the iganodon talking about catching his food, there's something to that, like Ducky said.
@Ducky123: Yeah, I guess we'll just have to wait and see if Rex brings his little friend over for dinner or not. :DD Also, thanks for that little remark about how insignificant Littlefoot's bites must be. Gave me an idea. :lol
Anyway, here's a new part, finally.
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It was another hot, sunny, summer day in the mysterious Beyond. In a sparcily vegetated, frankly bare region, resided a nest. This nest was placed close to a watering hole, nestled in an area, surrounded by a few small hills. In this nest, two large sharpteeth currently resided. one of these sharpeeth, a female one, was talking to a male one, seemingly protecting a longneck.
"Please, Chomper. We have to eat SOMETHING!"
"Can't you just go out and hunt, honey? Please?"
"It's STILL your turn, dear, if you've forgotten. You haven't provided anything for the family yet!"
"But, if I leave..."
"...Yes. I'll eat that longneck."
"Littlefoot! You'll eat littlefoot!"
The female walked a little closer to the male.
"Chomper, I know he means a lot to you, but you just have to let it go. YOu've got too much on the line. Do the right thing."
Just then, one of them looked over in the direction of the onlooker.
Oh, shit!. The creature immediately turned tail and ventured back into the foliage of the nearby forest. He looked behind himself, and saw his friend walking though the foliage. The little sharptooth was on a short trek to return to his parents. Earlier, he had spent quite a while among the foliage, probably just trying to build up the courage to face his father again. I can't even begin to imagine how he must be feeling. The little creature started to think to himself. What if My father lashed out at me like that?"
The herbivore's thoughts soon turned to something else.
Why do I keep doing this? Keep talking to him?
The young Iguanodon laid down for a time, deep in thought.He had learned the language of the sharpteeth from a passing flyer, and it had proved quite an advantage in the past. You pretty much had to be a coniving little bastard to make it out in the Mysterious Beyond, after all. He'd have long ago ended up as someone else breakfast, if it wasn't for his linguistic abilities. Now, however, he wasn't so sure. Part of him liked this new friend of his. Part of him was feeling some disgust over how he had been lying to the little T-rex. Oh, yeah, there was that whole 'You're gonna get yourself killed!' thought in the back of his mind as well.
That little sharptooth seemed so gullible back then. How could he believe that his friend was a sharptooth, and not a source of food? His mind soon wondered to a different place. A time not so far in the past.
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Guaro, scared for his life, did the only thing he could think of. He played along.
"Dang it, where did that little critter run of too!?"
The sharptooth's expression suddenly changed to one of surprise.
"wh... who was that?"
The sharptoothed searched through the woods some more, before coming to the same conclusion.
"Yes. It must have gone away."
Guaro was about to bolt it out of the area, before the predator spoke again.
"Who are you, mister?"
The little sharptooth was still trying to talk to him?" Why wouldn't the little neusance just go away already?
"I know you're still there, mister. I can smell you, after all!"
It seemed he wasn't getting out of this mess so easily. He would have play his little chirade for a bit longer.
"Yeah, I'm still here. I guess I'll just have to find something to chase down."
"Maybe we could look for something together? We might to better if we work together."
"...no! I... I', kind of a loner. I'll just look for something else myself."
"OH, okay. See you later then... whit. what;s you're name?"
"Guaro."
"Oh, okay. I'm Rex, by the way. Anyway, see you later!"
Finally, the beast ran off! It left him some time to think about his new acquaintance.
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He finally got the courage again to look at the sharptooth family. The mother had since gone to sleep. The father was still by the longneck. Actually, he had his back leaned up next to it, ready to go to sleep himself. Rex was facing him, in conversation.
"You should probably be going to sleep, little one."
"Can I sleep with you tonight? Here?"
"I guess it's alright. You're already here, aren't you?"
The young Iguanodon stayed in his little shelter, fixed on the family of sharpteeth.
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Sorry it took ages. I've just been so busy with work. Whenever I'd finally get around to trying to write this, I just couldn't. Hope you liked it, even though it was a bit short. THe next part should be longer. It's gonna be from Chomper's point of view this time.
On a side note, this is the halfway mark. I told you this short story was short! I'm only expecting to have 6 different parts, each one from the point of view of a different character.
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Nice to see this continued.
I'm curious how come Littlefoot hasn't actually said or done anything-is he unconscious or has he now died or something? It was mentioned he was still breathing so...I just figured Littlefoot would notice he has been dragged over to a sharptooth nest if he was conscious :lol
Random I right there haha...what is it for?
Look forward to the next part,
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Yeah, Littlefoot is unconscious right now, probably from the blood lose I'd guess.
Thanks for catching that I. It was just some italics code I botched up, and didn't notice.
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This was a very nice chapter. :) I enjoyed the elaboration on how Rex and Guaro first met. It sounds very believable when we consider how naive Chomper was about some things when he was Rex's age. I will be interested in seeing how that part of the story develops. As for Littlefoot... wake up man! Mrs. Chomper wants friends for dinner and not in a good way. :smile It will be curious to see how Chomper's attachment to his past strains the relationships of his present.
I look forward to the next chapter. :yes
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Ah nice to see an update :)
LOoking forward to the next part and I hope you can find a little time here and there :yes
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Just a small distance away from the sharptooth nest, a sharptooth bent over a small stream, in the darkness of the night. The predator stuck a large, sturdy, curved leaf into the cold waters, and dragged it back out, full of the clear liquid. With a careful, steady grip, he dragged this leaf all the way back to the nest.
There, the longneck resided, still motionless. The predator came up to him, and wiped old leaves off of the open wound on the great green eater's back. He slowly brought the leaf up, and used the water to wash out the wound the best he could. Upon inspecting the wound, he noticed there was very little bleeding left, and the wound was just beginning to heal itself. He then stepped on a small pile of leaves repeatedly, until they turned into more of a green, gooey, mush, plopped the better part of this concoction on the longneck's wound, and covered it with some more leaves that he had at the ready. The T-rex stood by the old longneck for a while longer, before laying down again, with his back facing the massive herbivore. He stuck his head down, and sighed.
Dammit, Littlefoot! Why do you have to leave me hanging like this?
Chomper was so exhausted from the unknown over the last few days. He took this time to think back, to when he last saw his friend.
It was on a sunny day in the Great valley. He was just a little one then. The grownup, who had somehow allowed him to stay in their fortified valley for a time, decided, out of nowhere, it seemed, to send him away. When they told him this, he asked if he had done anything wrong. Was someone missing? Did he hurt someone? The answer to both of these questions were no, but the grownup did not seem to care about it. They were not concerned with what he did, but what he would do, someday, when he was older.
Even though the little predator had been very docile in his stay, he was growing bigger, and all of the grownups were growing worried about this. They all though he might snap at some point, from his growing hunger, and kill someone. They would have been right, of course, but his young, naive little mind didn't want to believe it at the time. when he refused this request, it wasn't a request anymore. It was a command, bellowed out from an old threehorn, who had stomped right up next to him.
He was bewildered, but reluctantly, he listened to the pompous old threehorn. What was the alternative? To be stomped to death right there? Leaving the valley, he was filled with sadness. Did his friends turn on him? Did they not love him anymore?
When he went through the passage of the great wall, he looked back, and saw a familiar face, from far off in the distance, far away from the wall of grownups who were guarding the way back into the valley. It was Littlefoot's face. They're eyes locked, and much was exchanged in that moment. The little longnecks eyes were full of sadness, but no hate or malice. With a small nod, and a wave of his tail, he wished the little predator farewell. His friends had played no part in this, and were just as shaken up as him about this sudden change of events as he was. With this small comfort, he turned around, and left his friends behind forever.
Coming back from his memories, he concentrated on the now massive longneck behind him. Thoughts had been haunting him for the past several nights. The longneck's condition seemed to be improving, but he couldn't be sure. Nothing was sure in this world. There was still no way of knowing if his old friend would be able to recover from this. This unknown was tormenting the killer. He would eat Littlefoot if he was dead, but if there was still a chance, he also couldn't waste it. Part of him wanted Littlefoot to pass away tonight, just so he wouldn't have to deal with these emotions anymore. He would have brought Littlefoot's carcass back if he was dead, he knew. Even if he was his best friend. The first dinosaur he saw when he hatched. Food was food.
He thought back to when his father died. They were all hunting down a threehorn that day, Him, and his parents. They did manage to kill the beast, but not before his father received a damning gash from the leaf eater. The prey's horns had managed to pierce into his father's lower abdomen, and his leg, before he lost to the mighty predator. His father's bleeding was severe, and his pierced leg now refused to function anymore. It was paralyzed.
He remembered the tears, when his father told him he wouldn't make it. All three of them knew when an injury was just too much, even though he didn't want to believe it himself. He remembered the shouting, and the repeated refusals, when his father asked him to take his life. The old sharptooth didn't want to be in so much pain anymore, and a snap in the neck was all it took.
His mother finally did the task that he was unable to do. They both mourned over him after that. They morned for days. They shared stories of that feared sharptooth, about his greatest hunts, and his biggest mess ups, while sharing the threehorn carcass, one of his final gifts to them. Finally, when the threehorn was cleaned, they...
...They ate him, too.
It's not something that was easy to think about, but in this harsh and dangerous world, anything went. Sometimes you had to do horrible things to survive.
He was doing it all over again. Chomper was lost in an endless loop. Every time he dwelt on the same thoughts, it made him feel worse. It made him feel powerless. He was spending way too much time worrying about things that were just out of his control, but it was all he could do. He had no one to turn to.
"Hey."
His mind flashed back to reality. In his wallowing, he didn't even notice it when his wife woke up, and came to him.
"You really care about him, don't you?"
Chomper's head whipped around, and he set his eyes on his mate, who posed the question.
"I remember when you told me about Littlefoot. I thought it was just some mushy tale. Something to try to win me over.
Chomper didn't know where her mate was going with this, but he decided to play along.
"I thought you'd see me like the biggest looney ever if I told you, but..."
"...but, I thought it was really cute."
"Yeah, you thought that little longneck tale was cute... while you were ripping a longneck carcass to shreds!"
"Were we eating longneck that night? Hmm, I seemed to have forgotten."
She then smirked at her soul-mate.
"Well, YOU were the one that decided to bring him up while I was ripping that longneck carcass to shreds!"
"...Yeah. Guess it was kinda my fault."
The two mates broke out into laughter from that. Chomper was happy to finally be having a more playful conversation with his mate. This did bring some questions into his head, though. Why is she acting this way? Why now? There must be something coming, and something did. She spoke up again.
"So... about that longneck... Littlefoot. You should probably go out hunting if you want to save him."
That was logical, yes, but this raised a question in the mind of the friendly sharptooth.
"But... won't you just start eating him if I leave?"
She backed away for a moment, sighed, and then replied.
"Well, I've thought long and hard over this, and I'm willing to give him a chance, at least."
"A Chance? What do you mean."
"I'm gonna give you until tomorrow at sundown to bring home some other food for us."
"Are you really gonna keep that promise?""
"Would I lie to you, dear? I'm a sharptooth of my word. I at least have my honor to keep."
"So, I just gotta catch something else, and we'll eat?"
"HELL, WE'RE EATING EITHER WAY! Got it!?"
Chomper stepped back a bit when she blew up a little. She looked damn scary when she got like this. Her words were booming and chilling at the same time. So, if I don't make a kill tomorrow, Littlefoot dies. That's what this has come down to, isn't it?"
His mate seemed to notice what he was going through right now. Her eyes lost their fire. She crept up slowly to him again, until they were touching. She then stood by him, up against him, now with a tender voice coming out of her jaws.
"You could think of it as doing something for you're friend. You're going out there to kill in the morning. Kill... for him."
When she put it that way, it kind of put his mind at ease, by giving him something he could do. He could go out to hunt, and it could save his friend. Suddenly, He didn't feel so worthless and powerless anymore.
Chomper: "Then, it's settled!"
His tension lowered somewhat, and he got a small boost in adrenaline, and came up to face Littlefoot.
Chomper: "Did you hear that, buddy? I'm, gonna go out and hunt tomorrow!, I'm gonna find somebody, rip their throat out, and spread little chunks of em all over the landscape, just for you!"
He heard his mate laughing again, before she spoke to him. "It does sound kinda silly when you think about it. hunting a leafeater for another leafeater."
"Yeah, I suppose it is silly."
The mighty hunter then laid back down again, now looking escalated after the show of support for his friend.
"I'm gonna need some sleep. Badly! I haven't slept much these past few days."
"Yeah, I've noticed. Well, get much much needed rest, and go get us something good tommorrow."
"Sure thing, dear!"
The two sharpteeth nuzzled each other for a moment before the female left him. She smirked, probably smug about something, but he didn't to seem notice or even mind it. He was too drained to think about anything else. He closed his eyes, and finally, he was in some peace.
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That was until a rustling in the bushes awoke him from his light slumber.
What was that? he thought to himself. He took a look around, not noticing anything, before a small creature stumbled out. It was his son.
"Son? What are you doing up?"
"I... um... nothing."
His son was probably just unable to sleep again. Was his constant arguing with his mate really ffecting his son this much? The answer was obvious to him, but he'd just been ignoring it the past couple of nights. He was too occupied with his old frined to think about his son.
That was when a scent entered his nose. It was the fresh scent of a young iguanodon. He thought back to the son in front of him, who did look hungry. He had neglected to teach his son some more finer points of hunting. He had promissed him this many days ago, but had been putting it off. He decided he mind as well start a lesson with his son now. The little predator would need to learn such things sooner or later.
"Hey, son? How about that hunting lesson I've been holding off?"
The little predator's face lit up.
"Why, I'd love to, daddy! But, I want you to meet a friend of mine, first."
"You're friend is here? I don't smell anyone here."
"Sure, he's here! Just let me bring him out for you to see!"
The little sharptooth disappeared back into the dense foliage. Chomper could heard some arguing taking place, but he couldn't make out any of it. Finally, his son reemerged, dragging an iguanodon by the tail.
"Here, he is!"
"wh..huh...what is this, son?"
"He's my sharptooth buddy, daddy! Say hi, Guaro!"
The small creature freaked out, but suddenly froze right there in place, probably from seeing no real way out of it's predicament. The little thing finally found the meager strength to speak up, in sharptooth."
"...hi."
What the hell was going on here? His son had brought him a leafeater, that he called his friend. That part did not really hit the older shaprooth so much, due to his past, but the fact that his son thought this food was a sharptooth filled him with rage.
"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE!?"
He screamed out in leafeater, something he had not done for a very long time. He looked back down at the two. His son was flabbergasted, not knowing the words his father was roaring out, while the leaf eater was hit with another wave of fear. He just sat there, trembling before the mighty sharptooth. He couldn't even speak.
"I... asked you what's going on, piece of meat. Why does my son think your a sharptooth?"
"B... because..."
"...becuase you told him?"
"...y...yes."
His son suddenly spoke up, in sharptooth.
"Daddy? What are you saying?"
"Just stay out of this, son. please."
He turned his attention back to the little wreck of a creature.
"Why?"
"So he wouldn't eat me."
"You could have just run away, stupid beast!"
"I know, but... that was all I could think of at the time."
The prey gained a little of his composure back, and started to speak more clearly.
"I kept talking to him, and he started to like me. As a friend, I mean. We're... pretty good friends now, in the little bit of time we've spent together."
"You never told my son what you were, though, right?"
"...no. I thought he'd just turn on me if I did. I am... what I am, after all."
What the hell does this little thing think he is? Chomper was thinking. He badly needed some sleep for tomorrow, but it seemed like he now had to deal with this little brat somehow. He thought for a brief moment about giving this runt to his mate in the morning, but it was much to small. He had a big mouth on him, yes, but not much meat on him. She'd never accept that pathetic excuse for a meal in place of Littlefoot. He could just kill the little Iguanodon for the hell of it, though his son probably wouldn't forgive him for that. After a few more moments of pondering over this, he thought of another idea. His son needed to be a part of this, so he decided he would let his little apprentice make the decision for him.
"Tell him what you really are. Tell him you've been lying to him this whole time, and see if he still sees you as a friend."
The little leaf eater jumped back. He had fear in his face and his voice as he mumbled something.
"But... but, what if he eats me?"
"Well, you would have just brought it upon yourself!"
Chomper laid back, with a slight smile across his jaws, watching the scene that was about to unfold in front of him. The little iguanodon turned to his friend, while his son looked at him expectedly.
"Well, what's going on, Guaro?"
"I... have something I have to tell you... friend"
Well, This is going to be interesting!
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I don't really have much to add that I didn't say during our Skype conversation, but I just wanted to reiterate that I greatly enjoyed this chapter. :) I really enjoyed the way that you depicted the conversation between Chomper and his mate. Likewise, your elaboration on what happened after Chomper's father died was quite touching and gave good insight to the sharptooth frame of mind. It will be quite interesting to see what becomes of Guaro in the near future. :yes
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Very nice.
Chomper is having a hard time,he wants to protect Littlefoot but needs to feed his family at the same time.
And it looks like Chomper now knows the truth of his sons little...friend. I doubt Mrs Sharptooth is going to approve of that..first Chomper brings Littlefoot home but won't let anyone eat him...now her son is friends with a leafeater..oh boy.
Also a little typo I noticed.
They're eyes locked
Their eyes locked
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I gotta agree with everything rhombus said :) Chomper and his mate seem to be arguing every day which is quite amusing to an observer :smile
Chomper's little flashback is also very nice, as is the depiction of Chomper's situation after his father's passing which is kinda like the situation he currently finds himself in. He might have to eat somebody he knows and loves...
Chomper doesn't seem to be pleased to meet his son's friend :smile
This is your best chapter so far. Keep it up! :yes
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This chapter is much shorter than the last, but not really a whole lot I could think to do with this scene. Um, yeah. Hope you like it. :)
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Rejection. Defeat. Exile. It was the afternoon now, and This had already not been a great day for Brack. He had lost in a dominance battle with with some jerk he'd rather not remember the name of. The entire herd of longnecks had seen the show, and they had watched him walking off after being ejected from the herd.
He thought things couldn't get any worse than this, and then he heard a terrible roar. He jumped to the side to see a purple sharptooth now advancing at his very location. Shit! was all he could think to himself, as he had to suddenly come up with a plan to deal with this dire threat.
Longnecks were not known for their speed, so he had to employ a different tactic. He would have to beat the sharptooth senseless until he either convinced the beast to give up, or killed it. His entire body tensed up, and he took a more defensive position. He slammed his tail into the ground, shacking the earth beneath him.
This did not disturb the predator, however. He continued advancing at him, making a stalking motion. He now knew this sharptooth was either too strong or stupid to be turned away so easily. Hoping for the latter, he awaited the first strike. The sharptooth took a small sprint towards his neck, so he turned it out of the way of his razor sharp teeth. The foul beast seemed to already know he would do this, and instead, went right after his hind leg at the very last possible moment. Brack caught this, but just barely. He felt a painful slash across his hind leg, and his tail came around to slam the monster back.
He would have taken a moment to see about his leg, but the sharptooth came back quickly, in a headbutt motion. If he had worried about his leg just then, he'd been right open for an attack. Acting quickly, he positioned himself to the side to beat the shaprtooth at his own game.
The two met, and the sharptooth was sent flying through the air a short distance, he crashed to the ground, making a rather painful sound. Brack looked over for a minute to examine his handy work. The sharptooth only glanced up at him, and groaned. It made no movement to get up. It must be injured! Now's my chance!
With new-found adrenaline, he suddenly worked himself into a sprint. He carried himself as far away form the beats as he could, as fast as he could.
A while later, the sky was beginning to turn orange. The bright circle would be setting soon, and he would have to find a safe place to sleep for the night. As he contemplated his options, he heard a deafening roar. Looking behind him, he again saw the purple monster.
He was in a mad sprint towards him, with sheer blood lust in his eyes. "WHAT THE HELL!?" he blurted out. This things STILL after me? What's wrong with it? Surely the lesson he had taught it was enough. He looks so... desperate now. That fact sent shivers down his spine. This sharptooth was now determined to kill him.
Why? he thought to himself. He had heard stories of certain sharpteeth who would keep pursuing their prey. Once they made their choice, these sharpteeth would not stop until their quarry was dead. One story he had heard in particular was of some leaf eater children who were pursued constantly by a real monster. A sharptooth that was said to be so fierce, he was simply called sharptooth. They finally had to trick and kill the beast because it would not stop pursuing them and only them.Is this one of those sharpteeth?
He swumg his tail yet again at the monster. It seemed the sharptooth had learned form his past mistakes, as he simple opened his jaws wide to catch the massive tail. The force and speed had propelled his tail straight into the jaws of death. Unbelievable pain hit the poor longneck as razor sharp teeth dug deep into the tender flesh of his tail. In his attempt to attack his pursuer, he had only forced the killers teeth even deeper than they could have normally cut.
The beast jerked back and forth a couple times, quickly working his jaws off of Brack, with a massive chunk of flesh with it. His main mode of attack was now crippled, and the blood lost was horrific. Very quickly, Brack started to feel dizzy in his immense pain. The sharptooth rammed into his side, and he fell to the ground, He tried to work himself up, but much of his strength was now gone.
It had seemed to happen so quickly, but now this was it. He was on the ground. He could barely move anymore. The monster stepped up to him, staring him down. There was nothing he could do now. No more moves he could pull. He was going to die here today.
Staring back at the beast, the beast suddenly turned around, giving a huge roar. What's this bastard doing now? Gloating? Alerting someone else? What if his old herd could hear this roar? What if they're new leader was getting word of his demise. What if this new leader was lying in his nest, surrounded by countless females, laughing away, knowing there was now no one else to rival him? He suddenly yelled out, in a final rage at his executioner.
"Goddammit, you monster! Stop gloating over you're win! Just end this now, you bastard!"
The foul beast hung his head low. He was obviously distressed at something. Did he get a reply he didn't like? Was he feeling guilt for me? Who even knew what the hell this monster was thinking anymore! The sharptooth finally turned it's head back at him. with a sad face, the predator bent down to make the final blow.
He felt a loud crack, and then, he felt nothing.
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A very nice but ominous addition. Chomper seems to have guilt over something. Is this because of him killing one longneck in order to protect another or is that a hint of something more significant... I suppose that is a mystery that I will have to wait to see resolved.
I am curious to see what has become of Guaro as well. Did Chomper's son have friends for dinner? :smile
A very nice chapter overall. :yes The only thing that I noticed was that there are several cases where the italics codes need to be redone.
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Interesting... ;) There's a new character but Chomper kills him. Wonder in what way this scene is related to the whole story :yes
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"Ah, such a beautiful day!"
From up on a hill, he looked out at the lush landscape in front of him. A valley. Not the Great Valley, but a much more magnificent place. Many lakes littering the landscape. Cascading waterfalls, bringing more of the crystal clear w3ater into the valley. Untold magnitudes of dinosaurs in his sights, of every kind, color, and size imaginable. Not just leafeaters, but sharpteeth as well. All dealing in this beautiful place.
He took his massive feet, and took a stroll around this place, the ground shaking lightly from his immense size, his long tail stretched out, swaying back and front, to help keep him balanced.He held His long neck reached high up into the air, feeling the gentle breeze on his skin. He was heading towards one of the entrances of this place.
On his stroll, he felt a small thud on his foot.
"Sorry, Littlefoot!"
Looking down, he saw a small iguanodon, who had crashed into his massive paw. A few more children skidded to a halt behind him, looking up at him. They must be playing a game. He opened up his giant maw, to let out a small, calm voice. "It's okay, little ones. I'm Just glad that you're all having fun now!". He watched as the children ran off, still chasing the iguanodon.
It had been a few days since he himself had arrived at this place... or was it much longer? Or much shorter? The whole concept of time was lost in this land, so he really had no idea how long he had been here.
The mighty green eater had finally arrived at the entrance to this... place. He peered into the mists past this entrance, seeing a large form approaching. As it came close, it revealed itself as another longneck.
"Wh... Where am I?"
This new arrival was quite confused, just like he was when he came to this place. Confused, and initially scared, even though there was no longer a reason to be scared. What had happened had already happened. Nothing could hurt you anymore after reaching this place. He decided to greet this longneck.
"Welcome, friend! Welcome home!"
"What the hell ya yapping about? And where am I!?"
"Well, the Great Beyond, buddy!"
"Great Beyond? Dammit! Why'd that sharptooth have to kill me!? Stupid Monster!"
Such language! It was understandable, of course, but Littlefoot had to get this longneck to calm down.
"Calm down! That sharptooth can't hurt you anymore!"
"Sharptooth? I wasn't talking about the sharptooth. I'm talking about the stupid beast that kicked me out of my herd!"
"Someone kicked you out of your herd?"
"Yeah, some other longneck had been in my herd for a long time, and he challenged me after a sharptooth attack, thinking I wasn't making good decisions. Fool! Every herd loses members sometimes! We were doing just fine without you. Damn you, Shorty!"
Shorty? So shorty was okay! He hadn't heard from his adopted brother in a while, so he was beginning to grow worried about his well being. I guess if someone DID happen to him, He'd be the one yelling at me now, though. He chose not to mention any of this to the longneck in front of him, as he was still in a rage, which he had stopped paying attention to at this point. When the new arrival stopped his yelling tantrum, he questioned him again.
"You never told me your name."
"...Brack... name's Brack."
"Well, Brack. I... know you've been through a whole lot. We all go through a lot when we goto the other side, but... well... your here now. Mind as well be proud of what you did do. You've run your race!"
"...Yes... maybe you're right."
He was happy to see this poor soul finally coming to terms with everything. As Brack walked past him, other dinosaurs, who had gathered there during the conversation, cheered him on. From behind this crowd, Littlefoot could see his another longneck walking over to him. This one he recognized.
"Mother! Good to see you again!"
"Yes, Littlefoot! My dear, sweet Littlefoot!"
She had a soft face, full of tenderness and love. On her back, there was... nothing! No hole. No piece of flesh missing. No scar. It looked... perfect. Littlefoot stood there as her mother slowly made her way up to him, her face turning into a little more of a smirk.
"OH, Littlefoot! What a little foot you have there! Why, it's smaller than my toe!" His mother said in a teasing tone, as she brought her front foot up again his front foot, which was really the same size.
"MOM!"
He knew where she was getting at, though. She only ever knew him as her little one. She was killed by Sharptooth when he was still very young, so she never had a chance to see his grow up. She never got to see what all he accomplished.
"Littlefoot, I'm so proud of you!"
"Mom!"
Normally, you would expect some teasing, and laughing from this. Instead, Littlefoot heard some more cheering and praises from the crowd around him. He looked around the crowd again, and saw some familiar faces. His grandparents, long-passed from sheer old age. Topsy, doomed by the same fate. Ruby, who was brought down by something much more tragic. That same Iguanodon...
"Hmm... Littlefoot?"
He was busy reminiscing on the past, when his mother spoke again. Her voice seemed.... confused. Not scared, but bewildered. What's getting at mother? He thought to himself. He brought his gaze back to her face, to see what was the matter.
"It would appear that your time here has yet to come, son.
"Hmm? What did you say, mother?"
"I mean som... someone down there has been looking after you this whole time. You have to leave this place, son."
"What? Leave? I have to leave? Why?"
Littlefoot had no further warning, as his vision suddenly blurred. He started to hear... something. Maybe rambling? No, it was roars. Someone was roaring at him, apparently. As his vision was slowly coming back to him, he saw a purple blur form in front of him.
"Littlefoot, It's me."
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I haven't done this on this story before, but I'm gonna split Littlefoot's POV into two parts, since together, it would be so long. This here seemed like a good pausing point. I'm gonna work on the other half of it, hopefully getting it up soon, and not taking forever like I've taken in the past. The next part of this will be the last part, too, so hope you're excited to see how this whole little story concludes! :)
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Oh, very nice! :wow I really like the way you started with a random thing and soon more and more details are revealed. There's also the conversation with Brack who was apparently attacked by Shorty :o And of course Littlefoot's Mother... it's really sweet how Littlefoot interacts with her :lol: But it's only a short visit in the valley of the dead. Chomper is waiting and not for dinner actually :smile
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Wow, this was certainly an enlightening chapter. Shorty has apparently supplanted the leader of his herd, and the former leader has paid the price. Likewise, it seems that Ruby has already me her end... :cry Well at least she is in a nicer place now. But now Littlefoot has gone from paradise to his broken body... but now that he has tasted the afterlife will he be willing to persevere despite his injuries?
I look forward to see how this develops. :)
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"Littlefoot, it's me!"
He had no idea what was going on now. Just an instant before, he had been in paradise. In the Great Beyond, but now he was being forced out. Over him, there still loomed the same purple blur.
After a moment, this purple blur turned into a sharptooth! This caught the longneck off guard. Hy tried to get up to run away, acting purely out of instinct. He soon regretted that decision. Sharp pains shot throughout his broken body as it refused to get up. He yelled out in pain after the failed escape.
"Whoa, stop! Stop! Calm down! It's me!"
Littlefoot stopped moving. He had to rest there for a bit, as that sudden movement had made him light headed. His entire body was still throbbing.
"Littlefoot, You... remember me?
After awhile, the pain had finally dulled out enough for him to bring his head back up to take another look at the sharptooth, finally realizing who it was.
"Ch...Chomper?"
The sharptooth's face suddenly brightened up, a big smile stretched across his face, showing off a wall of sharpteeth.
"Yeah, it's Chomper, old friend!"
It was Chomper! His little friend from many years back, who had been forced away from him by a meeting he wasn't allowed to go to, or was even told was going on.
"I MUST still be in the Great Beyond. I thought I'd never see you again!"
a forced laugh emanated from the purple sharptooth. "You don't know how close you were to staying there for good!"
"So, I'm alive?"
He looked over to his right, to see two more sharpteeth. A female sharptooth, and a small male one, who was hiding behind it's mother's leg, staring at him, dumbfounded. The female looked dumbfounded, too.
"Oh, this is just my family, Littlefoot! My mate, Pearl, and my son, Rex."
"Well, nice to meet you two, I guess." "
He watched as his friend turned to his two family members, and started roaring and growling at them. They must have been talking to each other with that uniquely sharp tooth way of speaking, but he couldn't deny hearing all these roars and growls were making him uneasy. As they kept speaking, he got a little more used to it, and again noticed the other two sharpteeth's expressions.
"They look a little... spooked. Don't they?"
"They're just... surprised to see that you made it! I'm pretty surprised, myself!"
"I made it? Oh yeah. Still getting over that fact, heh! What... happened? Last thing I remember is.. getting attacked by some sharpteeth, then, I blacked out, I guess."
"Well, when I found you, You were passing out, with those other sharpteeth over you. I managed to get them away from you, then I had to drag you back here."
"Back here?"
"yeah, back to my nest! So I could nurse you back to health."
"So, I've been in this nest the whole time? How long?"
"Well, it's been a good several days that you've been out. I was really starting to get worried, there.
"Th... um... you're family's been eating, right?"
That was probably out of pace ,but he just couldn't shake the looks the sharpteeth semmed to give him.
"Yeah, We've been eating well. You don't have to worry about... that."
The longneck looked around his surroundings some more, this time taking a gander to the left, before fixing his eyes on a horrific sight. Another longneck, not far away from him. This one had probably been dead for awhile, as a lot of him was already... gone. One side of him had been torn into, and his entrails had been spread around the ground just in front of the downed creature, partially consumed. He jumped his head away quickly, trying to keep himself from hurling.
"I"m... sorry you had to see that."
Littlefoot looked back at his old friend, now looking very guilty.
"He... was he... you're dinner?"
"Yes, it.. well, he was. Wow, this is... awkward."
"I understand. I mean... you have to eat meat."
"He... I went out and killed him yesterday. I killed him... for you."
"For me!?"
"Yes. My mate had given me this ultimatum while you were here, healing. She told me I had to go out, and bring back a kill yesterday, to feed the family, or..."
"...Or, you would have eaten me?"
His friend's eyes watered up.
"...Yes."
"Br... Brack died... so I could live?" This shook the broken longneck to his very core. The very longneck he had seen enter the Great Beyond, He was entering the afterlife, so he himself could get a second chance. A second life.
He... didn't want to talk anymore after that. He closed himself out. What else could he do? Just moments before, he had been in paradise, before being kicked out, and thrust straight into... a graveyard. Literally. There wasn't just the carcase, left behind from his acquaintance in the Great Beyond, but several full on skeletons littered the area around him, with some more random bones littering the ground. How many dinosaurs now called ths their final resting place? All of their remains, seemingly left here as trophies. Trophies gotten from past hunts... his old friend's hunts. It was all too much for the poor longneck.
He couldn't get up and run away from this graveyard, either. His broken body wouldn't let him. He'd need a lot of time to heal from the attack. He was going to be stuck here for awhile, for better or for worse.
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The next day, he woke up to find a pile of leaves in front of him, left there by his friend. He laid there for awhile, contemplating if he even wanted it. He finally decided to eat his fill, still not saying a word. Having a little bit of his strength come back to him, he reluctantly decided to lift his head, and look around the nest again. The sight before him was surprising, to say the least.
Everything was gone! Brack, the skeletons, and the other bones were all missing!
"Um.. Morning, friend. I tried to... clean up around here all I could. I'm... still sorry you had to see all that."
His friend was doing what he could to not make him feel so uncomfortable.
"I'm sorry Chomper. I know you saved my life out there, and I thank you for that. I really do. It's just... This is just so... I don't know."
"Disturbing?"
"Yeah, that starts to describe all of this."
His friend shifted in his place, still looking concenred
"I was so worried about you coming to... I wasn't really thinking about what would happen if you did woke up. I should have had that... mess out of your sight."
"Hey, where's everyone else?"
"You mean my mate and son? Well, they're... they're out today."
"Out? Doing what?"
"Look, you don't need to concern yourself with all of that. You've been through so much, just get some more rest, please."
Littlefoot considered his friend's words. He was still so shaken from his reawakening yesterday. He already knew what the two other sharpteeth were out there doing, but he really did not want to think about it. His old friend was right. He... needed some more time alone in his thoughts. When he laid his neck back down for a nap, a loud yell hit his ears.
"Hey! HEY! Fast biters! Fast biters trying to get at the longneck!"
Littlefoot's head whipped back up, at the sudden exclamation from an unknown source. His sharptoothed friend suddenly got up, running after the screaming voice. He only turned his head back for a moment to yell back to the longneck.
"Sorry, Littlefoot. This shouldn't take long!"
What was going on? Was Chomper having to chase some fast biters away from him? He was kind of confused right now. His confusion only got worse, as the voice from before yelled out again.
Oh, hey! I heard you had come around recently!"
That voice. Where was that voice coming from!? He had never heard it before. Was it Chomper's son?
"Wow. Really had to get oughta there. Hopefully Rex's daddy can take care of those fast biters. I wasn't gonna get anywhere near em, hell no!"
No, this wasn't Rex. This was some new face, apparently. Someone he had probably never seen before. But who?
"Hey! Down here, big guy!"
Littlefoot finally looked down to see a little iguanodon staring up at him. What's going on around here!?
"Wh...what...who...you...huh!?"
"Wow. You still not thinking straight or something? I can't understand ya!"
"What...the...hell is a little leafeater kid doing in a sharptooth nest!?"
"well, what the hell you doing here, big guy?"
"I asked first! Mind your elders, dammit! you... you...Hmm, what's you're name?"
"The names Guaro. What's yours? Or should I just call you mountain!"
He couldn't even think of what was up with this little runt. He was already pissing the longneck off. He was hanging around sharpteeth, apparently, so he obviously didn't know what was really good for him. He seemed like a real trouble maker, too. He started to wonder if this little iguanodon had pissed Chomper off as much as he did him just now.
"Look. I was just trying to get back to sleep, kid. and now you're freaking me out by just being here."
"Well, you don't have to be freaked out by me. I'm just Rex's friend!"
"Well, okay, Rex's friend. Could you like... run off and play in Chomper's mouth or something? I'd really like to get some more rest.
"I wouldn't say no to that!"
The purple sharptooth had returned from chasing the fast biters off. He didn't really know what the other sharpteeth were after, as he never got to see them.
"Hey, Guaro, could you leave my friend alone for a little while?"
"Aww, do I have to? I was having so much fun talking to your old friend!"
"You even know what you're talking to, little guy? Littlefoot's got a lot a resting to do! Leave him alone!"
"Rex wouldn't like it if somethign happened to me."
"You wanna try me, kid?"
The still healing longneck was watching this other worldy little exchange, before hearing a roar emanating from the distance.
"Ah, Pearl and Rex are coming back! I wonder how it went?" Chomper was the one who had spoken up, with an... unreadable expression on his face.
Guaro had already gotten up, and run off towards the nearby woods. He seemed to already know what was coming, and didn't seem too keen on witnessing it.
Chomper roared out to his mate, when she replied back, his face still remained unreadable, as if he was unsure of how to even feel about the news.
"So... He did it. My son finally did it."
"What did he do? Is he okay" Littlefoot didn't have to wait for long to get his answer. As the two came close to them, Rex looked horrifying. He was caked in dried blood, covering his teeth and his claws. More revealing, however, were his eyes. They were full of sadness, horror, and disgust. The longneck now knew what had happened.
Chomper greeted the other two sharpteeth in their own language. The two larger sharpteeth tried to comfort the little one, who broke down crying. Chomper nuzzled the little one, before speaking to his mate again, and leaving the other two to walk up to the sauropod. Littlefoot spoke up before Chomper could.
"Did he do what I think he did?"
"...Yes. It was his first time. He's...really having difficulty dealing with it, but he had to learn this lesson sooner or later." He lowered his head, a few tears coming from his own eyes. "I'm sorry, son. I'm sorry all of this... stuff had to happen before your first kill."
He returned to the other sharpteeth, and they all got up to leave him. The poor longneck was still dealing with his own situation, but he also felt sorry for the poor little sharptooth. He had just done what all sharpteeth must do, and he wasn't taking it very well. He laid there, in the nest for awhile longer, before drifting off to sleep again.
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A couple of days later. Things had quieted down around the sharptooth nest again. Littlefoot still rested at his same spot. His strength was returning to him, but his healing was not done yet. His physical healing, at least. He had built up the strength of his spirit, at least enough to have an important chat with his old friend. The next time Chomper came by the nest, he decided to have that chat.
"hmm, so is this how it makes you feel?"
The purple sharptooth jumped up, staring at him, confused as to what Littlefoot was getting at.
"I mean... Does it make you feel like this... Chomper... whenever someone has to die for you to live?"
"Yes. It did a long time ago, and it kind of still does even today."
"It's still affecting you?"
"Kind of. I can do what I need to to survive, but I still have an appreciation."
"An appreciation?"
"Yeah. Every time I take a life, I feel... grateful for it. It's... horrible it has to be this way, but if it does, I'll at least... thank them for it, if only in my thoughts. Those who lives I have to take, to save my own, I make sure their death aren't in vain, in a way. I make sure I live my life to the fullest. I don't squander the gift that they give me."
Littlefoot had never thought of it that way before. His friend had to be a sharptooth now, but he was still Chomper, his old friend. He didn't lose himself when he turned into a killer.
"Hmm, I wonder how my son's going to get through this?"
"You were hoping it wouldn't be as hard for him as it was for you, didn't you?"
"Yeah, but everything's that happened. With you, and with Guaro, didn't make it easy on him."
"Well, you made it through, didn't you? I know he'll be able to get through this. He has such great parents, I'm sure he'll be okay!"
"Thanks friend."
"So, when you first woke up, you said something about knowing that longneck?"
"Knowing him? No, I didn't really know him, but I met him once."
The sharptooth just sat there, looking away for a moment. He gazed back at the longneck, ready to hear about the dinner he and his family had been having over the past few days.
"I met him... up there. I was there, to greet him, and welcome him into the Great Beyond. He told me a little bit of his story. He'd been kicked out of his herd, by Shorty, no less. And then he met you, and it didn't end too well for him."
"You were in the Great Beyond? Really?"
"Yeah, I was there for awhile." Littlefoot expected Chomper to look at him like a looney right there, but he wasn't. "I got to meet so many up there. My grandparents, Topsy, Ruby..."
"Ruby!? Ruby died!?"
He had let that slip, absentmindedly. The mighty sharptooth stared at him, bewildered. I guess I had better break the news to him, then.
"Yeah. If you remember, she didn't get to leave the valley with you, out of all of the confusion. She had went out into the Beyond for awhile, trying to look for you, but she couldn't find you. She came back to the valley, to live with us again. She was sorry that she couldn't be with you, but there wasn't really much she could do about it. Then one day... Oh, it happened so fast..."
He stopped there, not knowing if he could continue with the story. Both of the dinosaurs looked at eachother again, Chomper giving him a sad nod.
"...One day, she got trampled to death by the grownups."
"WHAT!?"
"Apparently, they had caught her eating some meat. I think it was probably fish, or something, but they were getting worked up over it, anyway. They just... killed her. They didn't even ask any questions. They were just..."
He couldn't say any more. He had tried to forget about it a long time ago, but his past was haunting him again. He felt a claw on his shoulder. Looking up, he saw that Chomper was in tears, just like he was. He came over to hug him, and they just embraced each other for a bit.
"It was a good thing that I left when I did, wasn't it?"
"Yeah, it was. At least she's in a better place now. I'm sure she's still looking out for you."
"I'm know she is."
The two let out of their embrace. After they had spent some time settling down, Littlefoot decided he had an announcement to make. He and Chomper had come to an understanding tonight, now having something they had in common. Littlefoot did already have this, from back when his mother died saving him, but these recent events just cemented it. He had to let his friend know.
"So, with the ones you have to kill. you said you make sure their deaths aren't in vain? I should do the same. I have to make sure Brack's death isn't in vain. So, I've decided, Chomper. I'm not going to waste this second chance. This second life!"
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I still have another part coming, guys. I know I said this would be the last part, but I'm just having to devote so much time to Littlefoot dealing with his situation. I didn't realize before how hard all of this would really end up being for him, and what it would take to get him through it in a believable way. I hope you still enjoyed this, and that you guys aren't sore at having to read another part! :p
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Hey that was really nice! :smile I definitely don't mind reading another chapter, hehe :DD
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Personally, though I'm not the one writing this, but I think Ruby's death should be avenged. :anger :anger :anger :anger :anger
I think Littlefoot should get together with the other members of the Gang of Five and help lure Ruby's killers into an ambush and Chomper and his mate will take the guilty party down.
Also, Shorty has it coming too. He's gone too far this time!
You could have Littlefoot turn on the guilty grown-ups and his own foster brother (who appears to be mean and cruel).
It could be an interesting understanding with Chomper, that, like him getting even with Sharptooth for his mother's death, both of them need to avenge Ruby. She is one of my favorite characters and I'm so ticked that they murdered her just for eating fish. :cry :cry :cry
The guilty party DESERVES to be made into a meal. Of course, if the Gang of Five goes through with this "Avenge Ruby" idea, then they probably won't be able to go back to the Great Valley ever again, but, then again, if the grandparents, Topps, Tria, and Thicknose are dead, and they are of age, perhaps this would be best for them.
It would be a nice final chapter. A huge twist in the story. Littlefoot, having worked with leaf eaters of other types to take down Sharptoot and avenge Mama Longneck, would now work with Sharpteeth to avenge Ruby.
Ruby needs to be avenged!
Also, I might add that an of age Chomper is likely to be green as both of his parents were green. He won't be purple.
Poor Ruby. That is so sad. :cry :cry
R.I.P. Ruby
(http://www2.hiren.info/desktopwallpapers/flowers/beautiful-pink-rose-2.jpg)
Her murder was a disgrace to Flatteeth everywhere!
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This was an extremely touching chapter. From Littlefoot reacting to his departure from the Great Beyond, to him waking up in Chomper's "dinning room", to him being forced to tell him the news of what happened to Ruby... It was all very touching and emotional. Although in light of how she died, it makes me wonder what conversations she and Littlefoot had in the Great Beyond... I am sure there were no dry eyes in that reunion. Likewise between Littlefoot and his mother and grandparents.
As for a certain iguanodon... he needs to learn that a fast wit is best followed by fast reflexes... I wouldn't taunt the big guys if I were him...
I only found two minor typos in the chapter:
"Beck here?"
It should read "back here?"
"I'm sorry, son. I'm sorry all of this... stuff had to happen before you're first kill."
"Your first kill"
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Nice chapter,glad to see Littlefoot healing. Maybe soon we will find out why he was out alone in the Mysterious Beyond in the first place?
Poor,Ruby what a sucky way to die. Being trampled to death,Chomper..don't blame him for being shocked at the news.
Oh,,Rex's friend is an annoying little pest.You don't taunt a fully grown longneck or sharptooth. Nope nope nope.
I'm glad there will be another chapter,I can't wait to see it,even more so if we find out a bit more about how Littlefoot's adult life has been going. :yes
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I'm just gonna try replying to all the comments/reviews I haven't replied to yet here, just to get caught up. I think it's gonna be pretty long.
For the Chomper PoV chapter...
I really enjoyed the way that you depicted the conversation between Chomper and his mate. Likewise, your elaboration on what happened after Chomper's father died was quite touching and gave good insight to the sharptooth frame of mind. It will be quite interesting to see what becomes of Guaro in the near future.
Thanks Rhombus. Yeah, Mrs. Chomper had to put her foot down, or nothing was going to get done. She ended up getting her way, when she talked Chomper into going out to hunt, and you could see that in how happy with herself she seemed after the conversation. As for his father, I figured that was something most sharpteeth did, considering how harsh it is out there, and how long it can take to find another meal. It's handled very delicately here, but I've also enjoyed all the joking of "Sharptooth Funerals" we've been having. Yeah, those funerals are definately pretty weird. Everybody there can't wait to get the formalities over with and dig in! :lol
Chomper is having a hard time,he wants to protect Littlefoot but needs to feed his family at the same time.
And it looks like Chomper now knows the truth of his sons little...friend. I doubt Mrs Sharptooth is going to approve of that..first Chomper brings Littlefoot home but won't let anyone eat him...now her son is friends with a leafeater..oh boy.
Yeah, he was really stuck here. He didn't want to turn on Littlefoot or his family, and he was kind of turning himself off at this point, not knowing what to do. Like I said earlier, it took his mate to get him moving again. About her not approving of Guaro, that's something I'm gonna have to get to in the last chapter.
I gotta agree with everything rhombus said smile.gif Chomper and his mate seem to be arguing every day which is quite amusing to an observer :smile
Chomper's little flashback is also very nice, as is the depiction of Chomper's situation after his father's passing which is kinda like the situation he currently finds himself in. He might have to eat somebody he knows and loves...
Chomper doesn't seem to be pleased to meet his son's friend
Yeah, his flashback about his father is definately somewhat like the situation he was in in this chapter. And more about Guaro, I hope I didn't make Chomper too angry to see him, calling him "peice of meat" and whatnot. I remember a review by DosuToDinner said that. I thought he would be this angry, because his little boy had been taken advantage of, and he wouldn't have liked it one bit.
For the PoV of Chomper's dinner guest... :lol
A very nice but ominous addition. Chomper seems to have guilt over something. Is this because of him killing one longneck in order to protect another or is that a hint of something more significant... I suppose that is a mystery that I will have to wait to see resolved.
I am curious to see what has become of Guaro as well. Did Chomper's son have friends for dinner? :smile
Yeah, I tried to keep that part a little ambiguous, so the reader wouldn't know if Chomper was feeling guilt over what he was doing, or if Littlefoot had run out of time, or what.And about Guaro, I kept having to push back showing what happened to him. Hope I didn't make anybody angry with waiting.
Interesting... :;) There's a new character but Chomper kills him. Wonder in what way this scene is related to the whole story in :yes
Don't you see, Ducky? This is just Chomper inviting a longneck over to dinner, like the friendly sharptooth he is! I know Mrs. Chomper must have been really happy to see Brack had made it to thier dinner party! :DD
For part 1 of Littlefoot's PoV
Oh, very nice! dino_wow.gif I really like the way you started with a random thing and soon more and more details are revealed. There's also the conversation with Brack who was apparently attacked by Shorty ohmy.gif And of course Littlefoot's Mother... it's really sweet how Littlefoot interacts with her laugh.gif But it's only a short visit in the valley of the dead. Chomper is waiting and not for dinner actually Dino_grins.gif
Yeah, one of the things I had been agonizing over was how to handle Littlefoot's stay in the Great Beyond. I just felt I had to leave it somewhat vague and mysterious, as a heaven-like place should be. His conversation with Brack was very stange, indeed, and it ends up really messing poor littlefoot up for a while when he does wake up. I'm glad you liked the bit with Littlefoot and his mother! Chomper ended up inviting another longneck to dinner, so Littlefoot doesn't have to worry about feeding the sharptooth family, at least. :p
Wow, this was certainly an enlightening chapter. Shorty has apparently supplanted the leader of his herd, and the former leader has paid the price. Likewise, it seems that Ruby has already me her end... dino_sad.gif Well at least she is in a nicer place now. But now Littlefoot has gone from paradise to his broken body... but now that he has tasted the afterlife will he be willing to persevere despite his injuries?
The bit with shorty was just something I thought of in the moment, but it really seemed to fit, so I put it in.
And It was your reply here, Rhombus, that got me thinking more about What Littlefoot had been through, and ow he could possibly deal with everything that was about to be thrown his way. Thanks for bringing that up, as whether littlefoot would be willing to persevere after seeing the afterlife hadn't crossed my mind yet, and I realized I had to show how and why he got through much of it, and decided to fight. Thanks, buddy :)
finally, part 2 of Littlefoot's PoV
Hey that was really nice! Dino_grins.gif I definitely don't mind reading another chapter, hehe dino_happier.gif
Glad you like the latest chapter, and I hope I make the last part worth having that extra part. :)
...
I'm not quoting Littlefootandalitogether's review here, as it's pretty long, but I'm glad to see you're enyoing my story too! I'm not going to critizise your opinion, or anything, but I will say there's some things you should be more aware of.
About Getting revenge for Ruby's death, I don't even know how that would work. You have to think of Ruby, here. You think she would be happy up in the Great Beyond, looking down at two of her friends, going on a quest for blood and vengence, against the place she'd been calling her home before her death, and against some of the leaf eaters she really came to like, all in her name? I don't think she would want to see some of her friends dieing needlessly like that, even if they ended up killing her in a mad mob.
And I don't think Shorty deserves to be Chomper's dinner, either. (YeAh, i know that sounds weird coming out of my mouth. but deal with it! :p) He just did what he felt was right. He joined a herd, and saw that there were problems. Members of the herd were falling victem to sharpteeth, and who knows what else, and he felt the leader wasn't a very good one, and he would make a better one. He did what was good for his new herd. He really cared about them.
If you would, I'd love to see what you think of this story, otherwise. I know you're a huge Chomper and Littlefoot fan, and I'd just like to hear what you think of this little situation that happened between them in this story, if you'd be willing. :)
This was an extremely touching chapter. From Littlefoot reacting to his departure from the Great Beyond, to him waking up in Chomper's "dinning room", to him being forced to tell him the news of what happened to Ruby... It was all very touching and emotional. Although in light of how she died, it makes me wonder what conversations she and Littlefoot had in the Great Beyond... I am sure there were no dry eyes in that reunion. Likewise between Littlefoot and his mother and grandparents.
as for a certain iguanodon... he needs to learn that a fast wit is best followed by fast reflexes... I wouldn't taunt the big guys if I were him...
I hope I gave Littlefoot enough time to get through all of this. Not just him, but Chomper and Rex also have some emotional scenes here. There's still some healing left to do, and some loose ends I'll have to tie up here.
About some conversation in the Great beyond, that's an interesting thought. I might bring light to one or two more of them in the last part. haven't decided yet, but if anybody would like to write out their ideas for some conversations that might have happened, or any other little story or tidbit you want around this story, I'd love it. :)
Yeah, Guaro is definately acting 'too big for his britches' here. He's gonna need to learn to keep his mouth shut, if you wants to live much longer. I'm gonna be going over more of his backstory in the last chapter, hopefully shedding some light one how he ended up being this way. Also, I gotta 'take care of him' in the last part, so look forward to that. :DD
Nice chapter,glad to see Littlefoot healing. Maybe soon we will find out why he was out alone in the Mysterious Beyond in the first place?
Poor,Ruby what a sucky way to die. Being trampled to death,Chomper..don't blame him for being shocked at the news.
Oh,,Rex's friend is an annoying little pest.You don't taunt a fully grown longneck or sharptooth. Nope nope nope.
I'm glad there will be another chapter,I can't wait to see it,even more so if we find out a bit more about how Littlefoot's adult life has been going. in-yes.gif
I'm glad you're still enjoying this story, Nahla! You bring up something I haden't been focusing on, with what Littlefoot's life must be like, now, and why he was out there in the Mysterious Beyond. I'm afraid that's another loose end I'm gonna have to tie up in the last part. Dang, hope I can fit everything in one more part, now! :p
Yeah, little pest is a good way to describe Guaro. (Though, I'm sure Chomper would prefer 'snack'. :p)
Whew, that was a lot of catching up. I'm gonna try to be better about replying to you guys in the future, because I know people always have things they'd liek to discuss with a story, and I should encourage that more. Sorry about that, guys.
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Are Cera, Ducky, Petrie, and Spike still alive or have they come to a bad end too?
Also, if the Ruby was murdered for eating meat, can we conclude that Guido, whom I also love, was murdered for the same reason?
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...How many years...
A beautiful valley. A Lush valley. My home. A perfect place. Well, not quite, but the closest to perfect in this harsh world. How many years have I been away from this place, thinking I'd never see it again, that i'd end up as dinner.
...Dinner for my old friend.
Fortunately, that didn't happen. By some crazy series of events, I got dragged to a sharptooth nest, and nursed back to health. Then, I left with something I didn't really want.
"Mornin', big guy!"
Something? Sorry, I meant someone.
"Are you zoning out again? Good way to end up as dinner, ya know!"
"Like you would know, Guaro? The little dinosaur that made friends with a little sharptooth, and somehow didn't end up as dinner? You know, I've heard many hatchling stories, and that's not how they are supposed to end."
"Well, it's not how your little hatchling story should've ended, either. Remember?"
"You know you are still little enough to... you know... 'accidently' get stepped on, right?"
"You are, too, you know?"
"What? I am not! I'm a fully grown friggin longneck, see?"
Professor: "Hey guys! What's up?"
...what? That... human? I don't know this... thing. But, then why do I know that thing is a human? What is he even doing here, anyway!?"
Professor: "Littlefoot? You lost in lala again or something? hello?" *Lightly bonks Littlefoot on the head*
Guaro: "Good one!"
"Why are you here, Professor? You're... not supposed to be here, are you? I was just..."
Professor: "Well, I think I should be here. Lived here a couple years, remember? Unless the council has thier collective heads in the ground again or something."
"Why are you always talking that way?"
Professor: "I've always talked this way. Makes more sense to know who is talking right?"
Littlefoot: "I... guess so."
Professor: "See? That wasn't so hard!"
Guaro: "Both the crazy creatures keep on talking to each other. That'll definatley go places!"
Professor: " Would you shut up please. You're the perfect size, you know."
Guaro: "to step on? With those lanky, wrinkled old feet of yours?"
Professor: "Naw, I meant the perfect size to roast"
Guaro: "Whats... roast?"
Professor: "You keep you little mouth shut, and you'll never find out. Got it?"
Littlefoot: "Now that we got all that garbage out of the way, what have you been working on lately?"
Professor: "...wait a minute..."
Ducky: "What is it, Profess..."
Suddenly, The professor pulls out his gun, and shoots guaro through the head, killing him. Everyone else screams.
Littlefoot: "The hell!?"
Cera: "he's mad! Everyone, tackle him!"
Professor: "I'm mad, but not in that way!"
Ruby: "Why?"
Littlefoot: (tearing up) "...friend. He was my friend, you... you..."
Professor: "No, he wasn't a friend. Look!"
Guaro shrinks into what looks like a worm, spewing green liquid around itself.
Chomper: "So, a little crawler? Can I eat it?"
Professor: "I seriously wouldn't."
Littlefoot: "How can you think about eating my friend!?"
Chomper: "Well, Sharptooth code and all..."
Professor: "Would both of you shut up! It's not Guaro, and it's not food. It's a memory parasite! they come from other dimensions!"
Ducky: "...What?"
Professor: "Yes, the come from other dimensions. They imitate people from other dimensions... different realities. Then they pick one reality to take over!"
Littlefoot: "That doesn't make any sense, old man!"
Professor: "Yeah, doesn't make any sense, does it? That's why they're so good. They're so smart, and good at planning, and no one ever expects them."
Littlefoot: "But... I went through so much with him!. I... lived through so much with him. Getting dragged to Chomper's nest. Almost getting eaten by his family..."
Chomper: "Hey, I remember that, too! I brought you to my nest to save you! I Lived with my mate, and my son, because I was..."
Cera: "...Banished from the valley."
Chomper: "...Yeah."
Ruby: "Wait, that doesn't make any sense! You're right here, and you were only done for a few days, before I gave up looking for you, and decided to eat a fish. And then..."
Littlefoot: "You... got crushed to death..."
Chomper: "Wait. That doesn't make any sense! That couldn't have all happened! I mean, I remember it, but..."
Professor: "...it made a few mistakes. Hmm, I guess they aren't all that smart."
The Professor then pulls out his gun again, and shoots the dead worn with him high setting, turning it into a little bit of ash."
Professor: "That should be the only parasite, at least. What a relief."
Cera: "So, what do we do now?"
Professor: "Well, we just go back with our lives, and forget all this never happened. Besides, he was a dick, anyway."
An orange fastbiter with black stripes walks into the scene, handing the Professor a cup.
Professor: "Ah, My mid-morning tea. Why, thank you, Taunt!"
Clicky Clicky (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_7ou27JwxM)
Past-O-Rama: Episode 53sd-+=^&3Overflow error - Total Recall of Fanfictions
and... I didn't really write any more for it. Sorry, guys. Been procrastinating on this fun little thingy here, and never got it anywhere close to finished. Though, it could only be for April Fools, and I'd probably forget about if I kept this till next year, so... here you go, guys.
I guess... does anyone like this? I guess I could finish it if you wanna see more of it.
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Ha, I remember this! :DD I still don't get what you see in that nasty leaf water, Professor.