This was a silly idea that I got while tinkering with ship designs - some cruise ship lines have all their ships share a pattern of names; White Star Line's ships all ended in -ic, Cunards all ended in -ia for a while, etc.
Anyway, I was toying with the idea of a thousand tiny tugboats doing jobs for one company, and how the names of these ships could get a bit silly after a while.
This started with only a few jokes, and eventually I got carried away writing lots of them. Some are good, some are bad. Eh, have a look anyway and tell me what you think.
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The harbourmaster leaned back in his chair. "So, what are today's reports?"
"Um..." the assistant flipped back through the printout of the day. "According to this, the Neurotic and the Frantic erroneously reported several sinking ships, the Moronic has run aground, the Symbolic is currently delivering a shipment of model ships, the Hygenic reportedly had an outbreak of flu onboard, although the Psychosomatic later sent word this was false, the Strategic crashed into the Ironic, the Hubristic has lost its fourth funnel, the Generic and the Realistic have nothing much to report, the Fantastic and Chic are currently undergoing redecoration, the trainee crew of the Kinesthetic failed the written part of their exam, the Anorexic is low on ballast, the Ergonomic's crew is reportedly suffering back problems, the Critic reports that the Egocentric appears to be sinking, although the Egocentric claims otherwise, the Dyslexic is reportedly sending out OSO messages, witnesses state that the Schizophrenic is apparently patrolling both the North and South shores, the crews of the Agnostic and the Dogmatic are currently fighting one another, so are the crews of the Capitalistic and the Communistic, the Sporadic has apparently vanished off our radar, the Cinematic, or a good replica of it is apparently resting near an island, the Carcinogenic's funnels have recently been repaired, the Asthmatic's ventilation system has exploded, the Acidic and the Caustic have crashed into the Toxic and will all require repairs, the Aquatic was thought to be sinking, but the Apologetic reported it had mishandled the signal, the Amnesiac is apparently unsure of its current location, the Agoraphobic is currently in dock, and the Catastrophic thought it might be sinking, but the Anticlimactic reported that things have turned out alright."
The harbourmaster ran a hand over his head. "Oh boy..." he grumbled. "Well, at least it's not as bad as that mess last year with the Erotic."
"Oh, certainly."
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