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Revenge II

LBTFan13 · 105 · 10186

LBTFan13

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I'm really sorry that it's taking so long to update. I promise you I am working on the next chapter as we speak. However, I have midterms at the end of January, which means this month is going to be a hectic one studying for the tests. Once midterms are over, it will be much easier for me to continue uploading!

Thank you guys for your continued patience with me!


RFZT

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Eh, don't worry about it. Life gets all of us, and tends to pull us back from writing as much as we'd like.

I read the first Revenge last night and I am loving the series! For a start, it's pure LBT, and I prefer true-to fanfics over crossovers. In general, crossovers annoy me because suddenly there are all these characters from somewhere else intermingling with another plot. The crossed show/book/something also tends to be something insanely popular like Naruto or Sonic. I dunno, I just don't like the idea of having characters from a different WHATEVER mixing with another whatever. ESPECIALLY when it's something like Naruto against LBT. Totally different worlds. So yeah, I prefer pure fanfictions because I feel like it's staying true to the story and makes it...better. Super Smash Bros. themed fanfics are different, however.

Oh snap, that was a ramble. I'm sorry. Something remarkable about the characters that really struck out to me was how well your portrayed them. One thing about my fanfic that I worry about is that I won't be good enough on sticking to their personalities. All of your characters acted the way they do in the movies and show. They were believable because of that. Whenever they spoke, I thought, "Hey, that sounds straight out of a movie!" You know their personalities so well, you can make the dialogue sound just like them.

Your description was excellent as well! You could work a bit on your comma usage. Otherwise, I was impressed at how well you described the story. You could visualize it, and you also used the right words to express what was going on at the moment. "Plummeting" and "plunging" can be completely different, and you understood things like that pretty well. One of your finest moments in this aspect was when Sierra and Pterano were fighting. It was an excellent fight scene. Very intense, action-packed and well-described. Probably the best LBT battle I've read so far. In fact, now that I think about it, this is my favorite LBT fanfic as of now.

But all this talent would have gone to waste if your storyline didn't work out. Well, it did! You turned the plot of all Rinkus and Sierra fanfictions--revenge--and turned the story into something of your own. The storyline was never boring or dull, and one thing led to another. There was never anything added that was indirect to the story or put in "just because." Everything flowed. And it was definitely exciting! Like I said, there was nothing boring about your fanfic. Whether there was a fight, a chase, or just dinosaurs talking, it all drew me in. One factor that definitely helped my interest was how believable you made the characters when comparing them to the movies/show.
I was even accepting of the romance. I normally despise the romance genre, especially when it's in fanfictions (hypocritically, one of my real-life books has to do with romance...). The reason why I hate romance in fanfictions is because WAAAAAAY TOO MANY fanfics have romance as one of the biggest concepts and it's intensely elaborated, even when it has hardly anything to do with the actual plot. Seeing all these lovefests really gets on my nerves. But you...for some reason I wasn't bothered when you did the Littlefoot/Cera; Ali/Shorty thing. I guess I didn't find it cheesy or pointless. Something tells me this romantic interest will play a big part in the series.

Well, I am taking up a lot of your time for you to read this, LBTFan13, so I better stop before I make the page explode! Overall, great, great job on the first book, and I'll start commenting on the sequel after you post the new chapter.


LBTFan13

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Well I gotta say! It's great someone thinks so highly about my story :D  Yeah all of those things you mentioned were really hard for me, especially keeping everybody in believable character. I must say though, the fight between Neo and Agent Smith in Matrix Revolutions is what inspired the epic fight between Sierra and Pterano. That will certainly be hard to top, but hopefully I can come up with something just as exciting in the sequel.

Which brings me to something I want to say. As we all know, in many cases sequels to a truly magnificent piece of work, be it a movie, book, video game, etc..., are never as good as the original. Coming up with the plot for the first Revenge story might had been a little easy, but the events which happened as a result were very hard! If the second one does not appear in the same quality as the first story, then I apologize in advance. I always wanted to write stories, and now I realize the pressure Christopher Nolan felt while filming Dark Knight :blink:


Chiletrek

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Hello:
 Well, I don't have the experience myself, but I can tell you that you must keep working at your own pace, and keep the writting a an ejoyable activity for you and not let pressure to make your plot good to overwhelm you. If you enjoy doing this, then write it as you did write the previous one and it will be a great story.


LBTFan13

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Well here's my dilema. I have finally finished Chapter 3, somehow, but for the past three days I've tried to upload it into Fanficrion.net and it won't let me log on to my profile because of a glitch in the system. If it isn't fixed soon, then I may not be able to finish uploading it there, in which case I will move everything over to here. I'm going to try again later when I get home from school.


Serris

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FYI, the problem still hasn't been fixed.

But I eagerly await Chapter 3

Poster of the GOF's 200,000th post

Please read and rate: Land Before Time: Twilight Valley - The GOF's original LBT war story.


LBTFan13

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Yeah you know what, I'm not even going to try uploading it on there. Until the problem is fixed, I will upload everything onto here. So I'll start with the prologue, then continue with the rest of the chapters.

Here's the prologue for everybody to read!

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN THE LAND BEFORE TIME, its CHARACTERS, SONGS, SETTINGS, ETC…

I ALSO DO NOT OWN ANY SONGS FROM MODERN DAY ARTISTS USED IN THIS STORY! EVERYTHING BELONGS TO THEIR RESPECTIVE OWNERS!

I highly recommend you read Revenge I before reading II, as the summary down below is minimal.


The Land Before Time

Revenge II

Prologue

PREVIOUSLY ON LBT REVENGE

   Rinkus and Sierra returned to the Great Valley in an attempt to exact their revenge on Littlefoot and his friends for ruining their plans to acquire the Stone of Cold Fire. They kidnapped Chomper, Ali, Shorty, Ducky, and Petrie to lure Littlefoot to the Mysterious Beyond. Along with Cera, Spike, and Pterano who returned to save his nephew, Littlefoot traveled to the Mysterious Beyond. Along the way, Littlefoot confessed his true love for Cera, while Ali fell for Shorty. Eventually, Rinkus led a group of flyers to stall Littlefoot, but Pterano killed him. Ali and the others escaped their prison, and after a near death off a cliff meet up with Littlefoot’s group. Sierra tracked them down, and after a grueling fight, with some help from Littlefoot, Pterano killed him but sustained heavy wounds. They all returned home safe and sound, and Ali and Shorty, along with their parents, decided to stay and live in the Great Valley



   The bright circle began to sink slowly behind the big water’s edge as night approached the world. Not too far from the Great Valley the big water brushed along the sandy beaches. The body of a brown flyer named Sierra lied stiff on the ground. A sharp rock was lodged in his neck, and his wing showed a hole from the stick which pierced it. The sand underneath his limp body was stained with blood until it clumped together. The body was bruised up badly from a fight with another flyer, and it seemed there was no chance of survival for the poor soul. Suddenly, as if by a miracle, Sierra slowly opened his eyes. He was still alive, but clinging on a sliver of it. He gasped for air, but it proved difficult with the stone stuck in his neck. Sierra couldn’t move at all, but he knew he had to do something before he succumbed to his death. I…can’t…believe…I…lost…to…those…brats…I…can’t…die…like…this… Suddenly, Sierra felt a sharp jolt of pain in his neck. Then he heard a quick, sickly sucking noise. Afterwards, all he felt was a small hole in his neck. Someone or something pulled the rock out, but who or what. “Thank…you…” he struggled out, but then his eyes widened when he looked up at the stranger. Standing above him was a dark green fastbiter. It glared at Sierra, and at that moment the flyer knew he was staring into the eyes of death. The fastbiter thought for a second and snorted.

   “Where is the longneck child?” he asked in leaf tongue, which really shocked Sierra. The flyer opened his mouth to respond, but no sound came out. “Where is he!?” the sharptooth demanded. Sierra couldn’t move or say anything, and the fast biter sighed. “His scent led me here. I know he’s around somewhere. Now if you value your life, tell me where he is!” Sierra finally realized who he was talking about. He lifted his arm and pointed in the direction of the Great Valley, sighing in pain. The sharptooth smirked and then stared down at Sierra. “I’ve always wanted to taste flyer before.” Sierra gasped with horror and pain, and he struggled to stand, but it was no use. The sharptooth then lunged at his prey, claws ready to tear and teeth ready to bite, and at the same time he thought to himself:

   Very soon Littlefoot. Very soon I will find you, and you will die for what you did.


TO BE CONTINUED



LBTFan13

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I know I'm uploading these rather quickly, but I feel like it. Anyway, here's chapter 1:

The Land Before Time

Revenge II

Chapter 1

   As the sky changed from its normal blue to a mix of fiery colors, Littlefoot climbed down the hill and headed back towards his grandparents. Following close behind him were his friend Ali, his brother Shorty, and his now closer friend Cera. They had just spent some time contemplating on their latest adventure, as well as their encounter with Rinkus and Sierra. Now without a fear of danger anymore, Littlefoot was finally able to feel some sense of peace in the Great Valley. As he reached the bottom of the hill, he turned back to the others. “Race you guys back home!” Littlefoot yelled back to the others. Cera laughed and ran ahead of him.

   “You’re on slowpoke! Last one home is sharptooth food!”

   “Hey no fair! You got a head start!” Ali yelled back. She then started to pick up the pace. “Come on Shorty!”

   “Aww give me a break!” Shorty complained. The four of them continued to race, with neither one seeming to gain the lead. Cera even tried knocking over rocks or tree branches to slow the others down, but to her dismay nothing worked.

   “We’re catching up to you!” Littlefoot called out. “Get ready to lose!”

   “If there’s one thing I can’t and won’t stand for it’s a bragging longneck!” Cera yelled back. She started to sprint ahead, and sure enough she gained a massive lead. Littlefoot, Ali, and Shorty desperately tried to keep up her pace, but it was useless. Cera kept running and running until she was long gone. The three longnecks then decided to slow down their pace to a casual walk. Panting, Shorty spoke up first,

   “Ok, whose bright idea was it to challenge Cera to a race?”

   “Don’t be mad that you lost,” Littlefoot replied.

   “So did you,” Ali pointed out, and the three of them laughed. Ali then said, “You know, Littlefoot, I’m glad that we’re friends and all, but are you sure about this?”

   “What do you mean?” Littlefoot asked back.

   “Well, I mean about you and me. Are you sure you’re ok that I’m in love with Shorty and not you?”

   “Geeze Ali, why do you have to be so open about it?” Shorty asked.

   “No it’s ok,” Littlefoot shook his head. “To tell you to truth, now that I’ve been thinking about it, I kinda prefer us as friends.” Ali smiled

   “Yeah, I guess I’m glad too.”

   “But did you really have a crush on him,” Shorty asked with a sarcastic yet surprised tone. “I mean, of all the longnecks in the world you were crushing on the dumbest?” Littlefoot glared at him.

   “Well at least I passed the Big Longneck Test before you!” Ali laughed again as Shorty and Littlefoot continued their arguing back and forth over the silliest things. Had she not known better, Ali would have guessed Littlefoot was arguing with Cera. Finally she decided to brake up the argument before it escalated into a full scale brawl. “You two are hopeless,” she rolled her eyes.

   “He started it!” both Littlefoot and Shorty replied in unison, and Ali sighed.

   “Boys will be boys I guess.” Just then, a figure was approaching them at full speed. As it grew in size, the three of them recognized it as Cera. The threehorn skidded to a stop in front of the group, panting hard. She had a look of fear in her eyes, and immediately everyone new something was wrong.

   “Sharpteeth……are attacking…….the valley,” she struggled to say. Ali gasped, and Littlefoot glanced over at Shorty.

   “Do you think they followed you and Dad here?”

   “No way they could have,” Shorty replied. “I mean Bron is big and all so he could have been seen on the way here, but we were positive we weren’t attracting attention!”

   “It doesn’t matter how they got here!” Ali frantically responded. She looked back at Cera. “Where are the others? Did you happen to meet up with them?”

   “Well there in lies the next problem. I told everyone to head to the caverns behind the Thundering Falls. So far I managed to find Ducky and Spike.”

   “What about Petrie and Chomper?” Littlefoot asked. Cera hesitated before continuing.

   “Petrie went to help his mother hide his siblings, but Chomper…” She stopped and looked down at the ground.

   “What?” Littlefoot asked. “Is he ok? Tell me he’s ok!” Cera blinked a tear.

   “I couldn’t find him anywhere.” Littlefoot felt all air rush out of him until he couldn’t breathe anymore. Ali and Shorty were taken back as well, but they were nowhere near as shocked as Littlefoot.

   “No…” was Ali could say.
   “You don’t think…….” Shorty started, but Littlefoot interrupted.

   “DON’T YOU DARE SAY IT! HE’S NOT DEAD!” he screamed out in pain, but before he could say anything else, Cera spoke up again,

   “That’s not half the trouble. I don’t know how to say this, but Ruby’s gone missing too…”


LBTFan13

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Here's chapter 2. Next post will contain the new chapter 3!

THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS BRIEF LANGUAGE AND VIOLENCE!
BLACKTAIL IS THE ONLY CHARACTER I OWN! I DO NOT HOLD THE RIGHTS TO ANYTHING ELSE!

The Land Before Time

Revenge II

Chapter 2

   Chomper felt a strong dizziness surge through his body. He didn’t know where he was at the moment, but he could still hear voices around him. Looking up, he saw four figures standing around him. He couldn’t pick out their definite shape, but he knew he wasn’t alone. “Where am I?” he asked out loud. He then heard snickering, and then hissing and growling. “Who…who is that?” he groggily asked again, but there was no reply. Then Chomper started to come to. The figures above him began to take form until he saw four fast biters glaring at him. Chomper motioned to scream, but one of the fast biters rested his foot on the little sharptooth’s neck.

   “Utter one sound and you will never breathe again,” he threatened. Chomper could understand him as he spoke in sharptooth tongue.

   “Get up you little wipper snapper!” another ordered.

   “Why should I?” Chomper struggled to say with the fast biter putting slight pressure on his neck. “You’re just...going to kill me!”

   “Our master has a special need for you,” the third fast biter replied. The fourth shot him a look of disapproval.

   “Don’t give away the plan you idiot! The master will tell him when the time comes!”

   “Maybe I should be the judge of that,” another voice called out from behind. The four fast biters turned their head in the direction of the voice, and a fifth fast biter appeared. This one had dark green skin and cold yellow eyes. He stared directly at Chomper, and when the two made eye contact, Chomper knew this was an exceptionally dangerous sharptooth. “Let the boy up,” he waived with his hand, showing off his sharp, hooked claws. The fast biter took his foot off of Chomper’s neck, grabbed him by the arm, and pulled him up. The dark green fast biter shook his head and sighed. “You’ll have to excuse him. You see, we just feasted on a nearly dead flyer, and he’s been craving for more.”

   “Who are you?” Chomper demanded. “And where am I?”

   “You are just few minutes away from the Thundering Falls,” the fast biter replied, “and my name if you must know is Blacktail.” The moment Chomper heard this name, his eyes widened with fear.

   “No. It can’t be you! You’re supposed to only be-“
   
                  “A myth?” Blacktail interrupted. He laughed and stepped closer towards Chomper. “Oh I can assure you, I’m more than just another bad sleep story.”

   “Why are you here?” Chomper asked, “and why did you kidnap me?” Blacktail laughed even harder after hearing the little sharptooth’s question.

   “You are certainly the curious one aren’t you? Well, I have some business to attend to here in the Great Valley. I need you to be my personal translator as I have seen you speak leaf tongue.”

   “Go to hell asshole,” Chomper cursed in leaf. Then he spoke in sharptooth, “Translate that one genius.” Blacktail shook his head again, and then leaned in close to whisper in his ear.

   “You really should be nicer to your elders,” and then he added, “especially to those who understand leaf tongue.” Chomper was shocked that he could understand what he said, but above all confused.

   “If you can speak in leaf, then what do you want from me?”

   “I despise leaf tongue,” Blacktail explained as he stepped back a little, “so I want you to act as my personal translator. To be honest, I’d prefer not to degrade myself and speak it like you do. In fact, you are a disgrace to the sharptooth race by befriending these grass guzzlers.”

   “First off, screw you because I’m not interested in your request,” Chomper started. “Secondly, you’re the disgrace for being such a coward that you had to resort to kidnapping. Finally, I don’t care what you think about me. These dinosaurs are my friends and family, and I will not allow you to insult them!”  Blacktail began to laugh the hardest he had ever laughed in his life. He almost started crying tears of amusement.

   “Ok, let me see if I got this right. You think these leaf eaters are your friends and family? Oh this is too rich! You’re pathetic!”
   
                   “SHUT UP!” Chomper yelled in leaf, and with that he lunged towards Blacktail, claws ready. Blacktail simply reached out with his hand and grabbed Chomper’s throat, almost choking him. He slowly picked him up and held him in the air.

   “So you realize how serious I am, I’m going to speak in leaf tongue.”  He glared at the little sharptooth as Chomper struggled for air. “You have two options you little twerp. You can be my slave, or you can die. The choice is yours.”

   “How about……. piss off?” Chomper managed to say in leaf. Blacktail began to squeeze tightly on Chomper’s neck, strangling him. Chomper knew at this point he was doomed.

   “I’ve never feasted on my own kind before,” Blacktail started, “but you have left me no choice!”

   Suddenly, out of nowhere, a rock flew right into the side of Blacktail’s face. He whipped his head to the side in pain and released his grasp on Chomper. Chomper fell to the ground, coughing and holding his throat, and he looked up to see who had thrown the rock. Standing behind the fast biters was a pinkish fast runner with red spots and feathers lining her back. “Ruby!” Chomper called out.

   “Chomper! Are you ok?” Ruby called back.

   “I am now thanks to you!” Chomper stood up and tried to move, but the other fast biters closed in on him.

   “Hey you bullies! I won’t let you hurt my friend, for he IS my friend!” Ruby yelled out. With that, she revealed another four rocks and launched them at the fast biters. One by one, they each fell to the ground, and Chomper hopped over them and ran towards Ruby. “Come on Chomper. Ducky and Spike are in the cavern behind the Thundering Falls, and Petrie is helping his family.”

   “What about Littlefoot and the others?” Chomper asked. “They never got back from the hill!” Just then, a grunt came from behind them. The two looked back and saw Blacktail slowly try to get up.

   “We’ll find them on the way back! Let’s move!” Both Chomper and Ruby started sprinting in the opposite direction, not looking back to see if Blacktail was following them. As they ran, many thoughts ran through Chomper’s mind. He hoped Littlefoot and the others were fine. He hoped Petrie would find that his family was safe. He prayed that Ducky and Spike didn’t wander out of the cavern looking for them. After running for what seemed like minutes, the two came to a stop, panting and out of breath. Chomper looked up at Ruby.

   “Thanks again for saving me Ruby.”

   “Thank you for the thank you Chomper,” Ruby replied, “and you’re welcome. Now let’s just get back to the others.”

   “I sure hope nothing’s happened to them,” Chomper said, and Ruby nodded.

   “They were fine when I left to find you, so as long as they are where I left them they will be fine!”

   “You’re right,” Chomper smiled. Suddenly, the sound of growling and roaring grew louder from behind them, and Chomper’s smile disappeared. “Oh no! They caught up to us! What do we do?” Ruby looked around and found two giant bushes under some big trees. She grabbed Chomper, ran him over to the bushes, and stuffed him inside the leaves.

   “Stay here Chomper! I’ll lead them away so you can escape.” She then pointed her finger at him. “Don’t make a sound.” Chomper tried to argue, but she had already stepped out into the open.

   Ruby turned around and saw the four fast biters approaching her. “You dome heads back for more?” she taunted. She looked down at the ground and grabbed a long stick lying next to her. Ruby grasped it firmly and held it in front of her like a sword. “Come on then! Who wants to go first? One of you will be first, so who?” Suddenly, Ruby felt something whack her on the back of her head. At that moment, a huge rush of pain surged through her body, and she lost all her senses. She fell to the ground unconscious, as Blacktail stood over her with a stick of his own.

   “How about me little girl?” he mocked. With that, he dropped the stick and looked around to make sure nobody else was around. When he didn’t see anybody, he sniffed the air for a scent of anything. At first, he thought he caught something, but then he disregarded it and looked at the others. “Take her back to the cave. She may prove useful yet.”

   “What about the other sharptooth?” one fast biter asked, but Blacktail simply shook his head, indicating they would deal with him later. The four fast biters then rushed over to Ruby’s unconscious body, picked her up, and carried her away. Blacktail proceeded to follow them, but then he stopped. He turned his head slightly and glanced over at a pair of bushes under a tree. He sneered as he left.

   “Consider yourself lucky that I’m letting you go for now little one, but next time you won’t be so lucky. We will meet again.” With that, he turned back and walked away.

   Chomper was filled with many emotions. He hadn’t realized that Blacktail saw him but was letting him go, and he didn’t understand why. None of that mattered though. All he could do was watch in horror as the fast biters carried away his friend.


BTW, any dialogue in italics is in sharptooth tongue. Otherwise, the dialogue is in leaf tongue, or standard English.


LBTFan13

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Finally after months of waiting, here is Chapter 3! You guys are the first to read it, so please enjoy and comment! Bear with me with the length of the post, and I'm sorry to the admins if this is considered spamming.

The Land Before Time

Revenge

Chapter 3

In the secret cave behind the Thundering Falls, Ducky continuously paced back and forth, waiting for her friends to arrive. She and Spike had been in the cave for seven minutes since Cera found them, but she told them the others would meet up at the cave as well. Spike had grabbed a vine sticking out of the wall and started chewing it. Ducky finally threw her fists in the air in sheer frustration. “I cannot wait any longer! No no no! Our friends are taking too long to get here! We need to go and find them Spike!” Spike simply looked up and nodded in agreement. Just then, a small flyer bolted in, panting. He landed right next to Ducky, and the little swimmer cheered. “Petrie you are here! You are you are! Is your family hidden?”

“Me…family…ok…Petrie…make…sure…they ok…” Still panting, he took a deep breath and tried to calm down. He managed to a little bit, but then a look of terror appeared on his face. “But me might… be followed here… by sharpteeth!” Ducky gasped, and Spike plunged his head into the soft ground.

“What do you mean followed?”

“Me think fastbiter saw Petrie! Petrie try to out fly, but me no know if sharpteeth follow!” Ducky ran and hopped on her brother’s neck, causing him to bring his head out of the ground.

“Well we have to find our friends. Yep yep yep! They will be in danger!”

“Me coming too! Me want to find friends!”

“Maybe we will find your uncle along the way. He could help us fight the sharpteeth! He could he could!”

“Me hope so Ducky.” Unfortunately, the moment they stepped out of the cave, a group of fastbiters jumped out from behind the bushes. Ducky screamed as the sharpteeth unleashed their claws and snarled with hungry looks in their eyes. Petrie flew closer towards Spike, and Spike prepared to leap into battle. Just as one of the fastbiters approached him, something body slammed into it, causing it to crash to the ground. What stood before them was very pissed off threehorn.

“Cera!” Ducky gasped.

“What the heck are you guys doing? I told you three to stay hidden!”

“Please no be mad Cera,” Petrie intervened. “We set out to find you, but here you are!” Cera hmphed and looked back at the cave.

“Get back inside the cave now! I’ll hold them off!”

“Not alone you won’t!” a voice cried out from the side. They all looked over to find Littlefoot, Shorty, and Ali rushing towards them. Littlefoot shouted, “Spike take Ducky and Petrie into the cave now!”

“Do you really think we can take them all?” Ali asked. “It’s now twelve against four!”

“Well we can split them evenly,” Shorty replied. “We each get three of them!”

“Sounds good to me!” Cera yelled. With that, she lunged towards one fastbiter and impaled it with her horn. She forced it to the ground and glared at two more. The fastbiter on the ground screamed a dying cry as its body went limp. Littlefoot and Shorty used their tails to trip another fastbiter and then simultaneously smash its head with their hind feet. Ali leaped onto the back of one fastbiter and bit its back, causing it to scream in pain and collide into another. Once on the ground, Ali jammed her foot onto the fastbiters heads and quickly flicked it to the side, snapping its neck. Cera grabbed a long stick nearby with her mouth and whipped it at two more fastbiters, knocking them to the ground. After Littlefoot body slammed into another one, he glared at the remaining fastbiters.

“Had enough yet?” Suddenly, an evil laugh echoed from behind the fastbiters. Everybody glared back to see none other than Blacktail

“So you must be Littlefoot,” he sneered in leaf tongue. “I’ve been looking for you.”

   “How do you know me?” Littlefoot asked.

   “And how the hell are you able to speak in leaf?” Shorty asked.

   “Just who are you?” Ali demanded.

   “My name does not matter puny weed whackers,” Blacktail replied. “What does matter is that Littlefoot is going to die by my claw!” Littlefoot gasped and stepped back. Ali and Shorty stepped back towards him to protect him, but Cera stepped forward.

   “Over my dead body asswhole!” Blacktail roared with laughter at the sight of a young threehorn trying to defy him, but Cera stood strong. “If you so much as touch him I’ll tear your arms off!”

   “Ok then little girl. I’m flexible.” With that, he lunged towards Cera ready to rip her to shreds. Suddenly, a giant tail whipped through the air and smacked Blacktail in the side of the face. The fastbiter flew to the ground, shuffled up, and glared at one tall longneck. Littlefoot and Shorty others smiled.

   “Dad!” “Bron!” the two called out in unison. Bron looked down at his sons.

   “You guys ok?’

   “We are now!” Ali said. Cera grunted.

   “I could have easily beaten the crap out of him!” Bron laughed.

   “I’m sure you could have Cera, but why don’t you let me take it from here?” Bron then stepped towards Blacktail. “If you have any intelligence left in you, you better leave now, and don’t ever think about hurting my son again!” Blacktail stood up but started to back away.

   “This isn’t over longneck! Mark my words!” He pointed towards Littlefoot. “That runt of a child will pay, and I will stand over his corpse and laugh. He will understand what it feels like to have everything taken away from him, and when he begs for mercy I will grant him none!” With that, he turned around and sprinted away. Littlefoot and Shorty ran towards Bron, and Ali stood next to Cera.

   “And don’t come back you creep!” she yelled out. Then she looked at Cera. “I can’t believe we just took out a bunch of fastbiters.”

   “I can,” Cera shrugged her shoulders. “These fastbiters were pretty stupid. It was very easy to kill them.”

   “I wouldn’t quite call them stupid,” a voice said from behind. Everyone turned around to find Chomper, unharmed. Ducky, Petrie, and Spike ran out from inside the cave, all happy to hear their friend’s voice. Ducky leaped off of Spike and squeezed Chomper tightly.

   “Oh Chomper you are ok! You are you are!”

   “We afraid mean Fastbiters get you!” Petrie said. “Thank goodness you all right!” Spike walked over, licked Chomper’s cheek and nodded. Littlefoot almost jumped with joy, but the morbid expression on the little sharptooth’s face prevented him from doing so.

   “Chomper what’s wrong?” Ali stepped forward.

   “And where the heck have you been?” Cera asked very annoyed. “We’ve been worried sick about you!” Chomper sighed.
   “I’m sorry I disappeared, but I had an unexpected visitor.”

   “Who was it?” Shorty asked. Chomper started to speak, but then he hesitated. Everyone looked worried, but Cera merely hmphed.

   “Just tell us already!”

   “Cera calm down,” Bron said. Cera looked up at the longneck and bowed her head. Bron then looked at Chomper. “Please Chomper, you must tell us who it was.” Chomper looked up and blinked a tear.

   “He…that monster…he took Ruby!” Everybody gasped, and Bron shook his head.
   “Damn, not again,” he cursed.

   “How is that possible?” Ducky asked. “Petrie’s uncle killed Sierra! He did he did!”
   
   “It wasn’t Sierra,” Chomper continued. “It was that fastbiter you guys just encountered.” Cera grunted again.

   “You’ve gotta be kidding me! That fastbiter doesn’t scare me! There’s no way he could have nabbed Ruby!”

   “I saw it with my own eyes!” Chomper complained. “You have to believe me!”

   “We do believe you,” Petrie reassured. “It no problem though, right Littlefoot?” Everyone looked at Littlefoot, but he didn’t respond. He was still trying to take in Chomper’s words. Fastbiter… Took Ruby … Littlefoot couldn’t understand why he would have taken Ruby, especially when he didn’t even know the fastbiter. Finally Bron responded instead.

   “Well at least this time it’s only one dinosaur. It will be easier to rescue Ruby since there aren’t two of them like before.”

   “It’s worse than you think.” A mysterious yet raspy voice appeared from behind. Nobody recognized it, except for Littlefoot. Whatever daze the little longneck was in, this voice immediately grabbed his attention.

   “That voice. It can’t be!” Littlefoot spun around and met eyes with someone he did not expect to see ever again. What stood in front of him was a very old, dark green mole-like dinosaur. Littlefoot gasped.

   “Hey kid. It’s been a long time,” the dinosaur said. Littlefoot could hardly speak, but the others were confused.

   “Who is he?” Ali whispered to Shorty.

   “You got me,” he replied.

   “I have never seen him before. No no no,” Ducky whispered to Petrie, and Spike nodded. Cera rolled her eyes.

   “Who the hell is this old geezer?” Bron glared at her. Finally Littlefoot spoke.

   “Rooter…”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

   Meanwhile, not far from the others, Hyp sat at a small watering hole looking at his reflection. He sighed as he took in how alone he was. “Man, why did Mutt and Nod have to go away on some awesome adventure with their parents? Now I’m so bored.” He sighed once more and threw a rock into the pond, watching the ripples expand through the water. At that moment, another reflection appeared right next to his. This one was a young, brown longneck kid about the same height as Littlefoot, and his name was Rhett.

   “You ok Hyp?” Rhett asked. Hyp turned around.

   “What do you want hatchling?”

   “You know I have a name. Would it kill you to use it?”

   “Fine. Rhett.” Rhett nodded.

   “Better, now tell me what’s wrong?” Hyp lightly shoved Rhett aside and stood up.

   “What’s it matter to you anyway?” Rhett shook his head.

   “It seemed like you were really lonely sitting out here by yourself.” At that point, Hyp faked laughter.

   “Me? Lonely? You hatchlings are not very smart. I never feel lonely!”

   “Right, and that’s why you complain about your friends not being here and you being bored.” Hyp started to say something but stopped. Could this young longneck really be getting to him? Hyp was very puzzled, but then he spoke.

   “Listen, just please don’t tell anybody about this, especially Littlefoot and his friends. All they’ll do is make fun of me.” Rhett looked even more confused than he was before, but before he got the chance to say anything something rustled in the bushes beside them. Hyp glanced at Rhett. “Is somebody with you in there?”

   “No,” Rhett shook his head. “I came alone.” The bushes continued to shake a little for a few seconds until it finally stopped. Hyp took a step forward.

   “Hello? Any pipsqueaks back there? Come out now!”

   “Is that really a good idea?” Rhett asked. “You have no idea who or what it could be.”

   “I don’t need some baby longneck telling me what to do!” Hyp shot back.

   “Hey I was only trying to help!” Rhett argued. Neither of them realized the two fastbiters hiding behind the bushes, and at that point it was already too late. They sprang out of the bushes and attacked their prey.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

   At the same time, Blacktail had rounded up the remaining fastbiters and ordered them to leave the Great Valley and head back towards the Mysterious Beyond. While he kept looking for his followers, he cursed himself. “Damn that little brat! Why did his dad have to come and ruin everything? And what the hell is that old mole doing here also?” Blacktail had noticed Rooter had arrived in the valley, but he wasn’t sure if Rooter had seen him or not. Whatever the case, the fastbiter made his impression, and now he had to fall back for now. Blacktail then ran into one of his fellow fastbiters. “What is your report?” he hissed.

   “Two more of the kid’s friends have been captured. A longneck and a two footer.”  Blacktail nodded.

   “Were they harmed?”  The other fastbiter shook his head. “Take them back to the cave. They can join the girl fast runner. Make sure you restrain all of them, and do not kill them. Understand?” The fastbiter nodded and sprinted in the opposite direction. Blacktail couldn’t help but smile. “Everything is going according to plan. I will use his friends to lure him to me, and then I will kill him. Once I am done with him, I will kill the rest of his little friends, and then the rest of the Great Valley shall fall!” Blacktail laughed a demonic laugh before he continued heading towards the Mysterious Beyond.

To Be Continued…


Dark Pterano

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That issue over on fanfiction.net is fixed for now?


Cancerian Tiger

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Yippee!  A long-anticipated update!  Man, they kicked some serious booty in that chapter :yes!  This is getting good 'n suspenseful!


LBTFan13

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Yeah I managed to upload it onto fanfiction.net. You can follow the link to it here if you so desire to

LBT Revenge Chapter 3


LBTFan13

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I was kind of afraid this would happen, but it seems like a lot of people have lost interest in my story because of how long it took me to upload the next chapter. Nobody has really left a review for the chapter, which is strange because normally when I upload a chapter I would have maybe three or four reviews within a day. :unsure:  

However, if that's how it is then so be it. I will continue to upload the rest of the story, and then maybe for whatever else I write it will be uploaded onto here exclusively where I know people will appreciate it.

Of course, I might just be acting paranoid at the moment, and if I come off as such I am sorry.


Chiletrek

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Hello:
 Sometimes it takes time for people to get to know you uploaded a new chapter after I think you had a problem with the page and that made you delay the whole thing. So I don't think it is that people lost interest, but just give time so they can see you could finally make an update. Just don't let the sudden lack of reviews to affect you and remember that you must write first for yourself because that should make you feel good. That may sound kind of selfish, but if the writter doesn't enjoy writting, then why to write? ;) .
 Just keep up the great work!


AnimeLover

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I Read The Revenge In The Land Before Time On Fanfiction And It Turns Out There Was Violence Which Mad Dad Doesn't Like.

But 8 Days Ago Before I Watched Glory Which Was R-Rated On DVD The One I Got From The Library, My Dad Saids It Has Some Violence And A Little Bit Of Cuss Words. But He Saids That Glory Is A History Movie About A Colonel With A Team Called The 54th Massachusetts To Fight War Which Had Violence.

The Revenge Story In The Land Before Was Too Violent, But It's Fine.


Serris

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Actually, I didn't think the Revenge series is that violent. I've seen much more violent LBT fics and even RPs.

Poster of the GOF's 200,000th post

Please read and rate: Land Before Time: Twilight Valley - The GOF's original LBT war story.


LBTFan13

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I was always curious to see how violent people thought Revenge actually was. I agree there are some violent parts in there, maybe too violent for the good of the LBT, but that's what makes fanfiction fun. You get the freedom to go "what if this happened" or "what if this was possible". Also, any idea that would not work for a movie can almost always work for a fanfiction, because Revenge would certainly NEVER work for a movie, at least if it wasn't toned down by a lot.

Speaking of which, I once again apologize for the inactivity. Vacation and school and play take up so much of my time. I promise you guys I am still working on the story, as much as I can ;)


Dark Pterano

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That's what I like about fanfiction, because you can take characters and have them do anything you want with them. Like for any kind of story, you could write about Scooby Doo vs a dog OC as part of a dog gang turf war between two dog gang families (one of my friends on fanfiction.net did something that in one of her Scooby Doo stories) or even have Sierra vs Pterano fight to the death for a story?

Or maybe have Petrie and Ducky as boyfriend and girlfriend, or Spike starts talking  for most of a story/movie, anything can happen!


LBTFan13

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Well after a busy time figuring this part out, here is Chapter 4 to Revenge II. Once again, you guys are the first to read this, so enjoy :D

The Land Before Time

Revenge II

Chapter 4

   “So your name is Rooter?” Ali asked. The group was leading Rooter to the circle of stones while Bron went ahead to gather the adults to discuss about the recent sharptooth attack. Rooter simply nodded, and Ali asked, “So how do you and Littlefoot know each other?”

   “Oh I found your friend when he was just a hatchling. I’m kind of a wanderer you see and was minding my own business when something bumped into me. I turned around and saw a young longneck crying.” Everyone nodded, but Cera merely grunted.

   “Can we stop talking about the past and worry about what’s happening now!” Ali gasped a little, shocked by Cera’s rudeness, but Littlefoot simply ignored it. He wasn’t surprised with Cera’s reaction because he was certain she was feeling some remorse for the death of the longneck that saved her life.

   “She’s right,” Rooter agreed. “The past cannot be undone, and there is no use feeling remorseful about it. Right now we have to deal with Blacktail.”

   “He sure seems tough,” Shorty commented. “He’s definitely worse than Rinkus and Sierra.” Ali nodded.

   “He is definitely scary. What do you think Chomper?” She turned back towards Chomper, but the young sharptooth did not seem to be in the mood to talk. He had dropped back away from the group and hung his head low. Everyone glanced back and could tell he was crying. “Chomper?” Ali called out, but Rooter sighed and gently shoved her aside.

   “Let me talk to him.” He then looked at Littlefoot. “Lead the way kid.” Littlefoot nodded and stepped ahead while Rooter fell back towards Chomper until he was walking right next to him. “You know in all my years I would have never expected a sharptooth to be living among leaf eaters.” Chomper didn’t respond. He simply kept his head low and started to cry a little harder. Rooter had seen this before when he met Littlefoot, and at that moment he knew what he had to say. “Listen kid, I am going to tell you exactly what I told your friend Littlefoot. It is nobody’s fault that Blacktail kidnapped your friend, and it is most certainly not your fault. The great circle of life continues-“ Chomper shot his head up and angrily interrupted,

   “You don’t understand! It is my fault! If Ruby didn’t have to come and save me she’d be here right now! If I hadn’t stayed in that bush I could have helped her! If I-“

   “If you had tried to do anything you would be dead,” Rooter interjected. “There was nothing you could have done to help her. She gave herself up to save you.” Chomper wanted to argue but couldn’t. He knew Rooter was right, but it was too hard for him to admit it. “Look kid, I know how hard it is to lose a friend. I don’t even really have anybody to call a friend. I also know that there is no use in thinking about what could have happened. All you can worry about now is what has happened and what you can do about, not what you want to do.”

   “But Blacktail might kill her!” Chomper replied. “If she dies…”

   “She won’t. I promise you we will save Ruby and take care of Blacktail.” Chomper looked up at Rooter, and at that moment he knew he was telling the truth. The little sharptooth blinked another tear and nodded. “Come on then. Your friends are waiting for us, and it looks like we arrived at the meeting place.” Rooter was right. The circle of stones was in view, and they could also see the group of adults as well. Rooter and Chomper hurried up to join Littlefoot and the others. They arrived in the middle of the circle as the adults were already discussing. Grandpa and Grandpa Longneck rushed towards Littlefoot while his friends all hurried to their parents. Grandma Longneck lowered her head and nuzzled Littlefoot.

   “Are you ok little one?” she asked.

   “I’m fine grandma,” Littlefoot replied. Grandpa Longneck then nuzzled him.

   “Thank goodness those sharpteeth didn’t hurt you. We were worried sick about you.” Littlefoot smiled a little and nodded, and then Grandpa Longneck addressed the rest of the herd. “Everyone we have a serious problem. Sharpteeth don’t randomly attack the Great Valley. Something is wrong.” Topsy, Cera’s dad, was of course the first to respond.

   “Sharpteeth are too much of cowards to organize an attack like this. They must have been after something.” Then Pterano, Petrie’s uncle, joined the group. He was stilled somewhat injured from his previous fight with Sierra so he couldn’t fly, but he was still able to walk.

   “Did the sharpteeth take anybody with them?” The children all looked at each other and dropped their heads. Pterano sighed. “It’s just like before with Rinkus and Sierra. Who was taken this time?”

   “Our friend Ruby,” Ducky started. “Those mean fastbiters took her! They did they did!”

   “Was she the only one?” Pterano asked, but Bron who was next to Grandma and Grandpa Longneck shook his head.

   “Unfortunately there are two more hostages. I caught a glimpse of them leaving the valley, and some of the fastbiters were carrying another longneck and a runner.” The kids thought for a moment and then Ali gasped.

   “The other longneck is Rhett!” Everyone grew worried, and then Littlefoot realized something.

   “The only runner we know is Hyp, so they have him too?” Cera groaned.

   “We really have to save Hyp? I’d rather be covered in sharptooth drool than help him!” She then glared at Chomper before he had the opportunity to remind her that he could make that possible.

   “Yes we must save them,” Ducky scolded. “Rhett is our friend! He is he is!”
   
   “And Hyp not always mean,” Petrie commented. “He just confused.”

   “I’m afraid that’s easier said than done,” Chomper finally spoke. Everyone turned towards him, and he stepped forward. “We aren’t dealing with pushovers like Rinkus and Sierra. This fastbiter is nothing but bad news.”

   “But why?” Ali asked. “Why is he so terrifying?” Rooter then cleared his throat.

   “I suppose I should tell you all who we are dealing with.” He then looked at everybody before continuing. “Blacktail is a ruthless fast biter. He is a wanderer like me, except he kills everything in his path. He doesn’t care about anybody except himself. Not even other sharpteeth are safe from his wrath. Everywhere he goes he leaves death and destruction in his trail.” Then Bron spoke up.

   “If he’s an enemy to other sharpteeth, then why are there other fast biters working for him?”

   “They’re probably too threatened to fight him,” Ducky’s mother said. “I know I certainly wouldn’t want to go against a monster like that.”

   “Not even Sierra was this evil,” Pterano sighed. “I never thought I would hear of anybody crueler than him.”

   “But something doesn’t make sense,” Petrie’s mother said. “Why would Blacktail come to the Great Valley? And why would he kidnap the children? We’ve done nothing to him.”

   “Well it doesn’t help that we have a sharptooth living with us!” Topsy replied and then immediately glared at Chomper. “Maybe he’s a friend of yours and you led him here!”

   “Mr. Threehorn you can’t be serious!” Grandpa Longneck yelled. “Chomper would never align himself with a vicious sharptooth like that!” Topsy grunted, and Rooter spoke up again.

   “He’s right. Besides, Blacktail would never align himself with anybody for that matter. Chomper has nothing to do with this. As for why he kidnapped the children…” He stopped and then glanced over at Littlefoot. “He wants to kill Littlefoot.” Everybody gasped, and Littlefoot inched very close to his grandparents.

   “What do you mean?” Shorty asked. “What’s Littlefoot got to do with this?”

   “I don’t think it would be right for me to tell you,” Rooter sighed. “It will only bring pain.”

   “What the hell are you talking about?” Cera yelled. “In case you haven’t noticed, our friends are in danger because of this fast biter, and you won’t tell us why? Who the hell do you think you are?” Topsy couldn’t help but smirk a little at her daughter’s behavior, but Bron stepped forward.

   “Cera stop it! I’m sure Rooter will tell us if you let him!” Cera stepped back, and all eyes were on Rooter. Finally, he addressed the whole group.

   “Does the name Sharptooth mean anything?” Everyone was confused at first.

   “Well yeah,” Ali said. “Aren’t all sharpteeth named sharptooth?”

   “It’s not just any sharptooth.” All eyes were on Littlefoot as they found a look of sheer terror. Littlefoot almost couldn’t breathe. “It’s………it’s……..” It wasn’t long before Cera realized it, and her mouth dropped.

   “No…….. you can’t…….. you can’t mean……..him!” Just then, Ducky, Petrie, Spike, Chomper, Grandma and Grandpa Longneck, and Bron all grew the same horrified look, and Rooter lowered his head.

   “I’m sorry, but you have to know.” Shorty and Ali were still confused.

   “Who are you talking about?” Shorty asked.

   “Sharptooth,” Chomper replied. “THE Sharptooth. The original monster.” Then Littlefoot spoke in a whisper.

   “He….. he….. killed my mother………” Grandma and Grandpa Longneck both nuzzled him, and Bron moved closer.”

   “What does he have to do with any of this?” Then Ducky and Petrie replied in unison.
   “We……. we……. killed him……” Everyone had mixed reactions. Most of them were confused as to why this was a bad thing, but then Rooter said the one thing that would strike the utmost fear into everybody’s heart.

   “Blacktail, the fast biter who has Littlefoot’s friends, is an orphan. His mother had died during the great earthshake, but his father was murdered some time after it.” He then looked over to Littlefoot, and he saw a tear roll down the longneck’s cheek. Rooter knew that Littlefoot had realized what this meant. “Blacktail………… is Sharptooth’s son.”

TO BE CONTINUED

Once again, I’m sorry for the wait. School is almost done for me, so I will have more time to work on this.

Before anybody says anything, I will explain everything in the next chapter, and I promise this does not compromise the first LBT movie in anyway!

Anyway, hope you guys like this!