Help with a "LBT War Fanfic"

[Serris]

Another problem:

How should our heroes find Cloud Island?

I have 3 choices:

1.) Rime will know the route to Cloud Island and he will show the heroes the way.

2.) Deimos and his gang capture an enemy sickleclaw use interrogation/torture to extract the information.

3.) Use the Great Valley Air Corps for recon and find it that way.

Which do you think will fit better with the story?


On a side note, I have part of the "Rime problem" solved.

He will defect but I don't know where to have him flee from.

I considered having him flee from Cloud Island (prison break!) but how am I going to get him off the island? I mean, there's no plane or boat for him to steal.

I may have to resort to him fleeing from the conquered Great Valley or Claw Valley.

If I choose to have Rime help our heroes to find Cloud Island it will be better explained if Rime was originally held on Cloud Island.

As for his family, should I have them be rescued by our heroes and join as characters or should I have them be already dead (heroes didn't arrive in time) or should they just go own their own way and not have anything to do with the war?

[Dark Pterano]

I kind of just now came up with an idea, about how the heroes find cloud island. You could have Pterano and about five of the un named GVAC flyers find it while doing some recon. But then Rinkus, Sierra & about six of the un named CVAC flyers show up and a sky/air style  dog fight starts between the GVAC flyers & the CVAC flyers.

In fact you could have that one idea come in to play that I gave you, with Sierra, now sporting the lion king like scar on his left eye. Well anyway only Pterano is the only one, that's able to get away from Sierra, Rinkus & the CVAC flyers. But at the same time only Rinkus and Sierra are the only two left after the battle.

(Pterano who did get hurt by Sierra & later in another chapter will sport the lion king like scar, but on his right eye!)

But as for the other one, I really don't know which would be best. And did you like like other idea about Theta having a sister that get killed in a one on one fight with Ducky's Mother in an upcoming chapter?

[Serris]

Dark Pterano,

I was going to put in Theta's sister (who will be killed by Ducky's mother in a brutal 1 vs. 1 fight) but I'm deciding how to introduce her without causing some continuity problems and what to name her.

And after MANY chapters with combat I want to include some chapters with no combat (torture and sparring, yes but GV vs. CV dinosaur combat, no) so I'm going to hold off on the dogfighting for now.

[aabicus (LettuceBacon&Tomato)]

Some Great Valley dinosaurs could bust Rime out of Cloud Island with help from an aquatic dinosaur, like Mo or Elsie. Alternately, they could learn about Cloud Island from someone who escaped from there in the past. Might be a good way to provide background on a character.

[Dark Pterano]

Serris,

I was thinking that his sister's name could sound kind of like Theta, but change the first letter on it, some what to look like one of these names like this maybe, who knows?

(Zheta, Kheta, Sheta, Fheta, Nheta!)

Maybe you could have Theta's sister a part of the secret CV underwater swimmer team, or in this case Blue, Gray or Brown Team. But when she and Ducky's Mother do have that brutal one on one fight to the death. They are moving all around/over the area, by fighting and stomping their through a small field of flowers until they end up knee or waist deep in water. In fact that's where Ducky's Mother ends up killing Theta's sister.

[Serris]

I have the "Rime Problem" totally fixed but I ran into a new problem.

The gang will be going on an expedition to the Land of the Mists but the antagonists from LBT IV (Icthy and Dil) are at the Great Valley. Thus, there are no real antagonists save for the hostile terrain.

I have considered adding in something from Dink: The Little Dinosaur (more brutal than their version).

I considered having the group encounter some hostile plant-eaters who demand that Littlefoot (or possibly someone else) fight them in a 1 vs. 1 confrontation before they let them pass.

What I like about this idea is how it establishes that there are villains who aren't affiliated with Claw Valley.

The bad part is that I add to the already massive cast of characters.

[Dark Pterano]

I kind of have an idea, that's somewhat like yours. But instead of a one on one fight before letting them pass by/through. I was thinking on the lines of maybe having them trying to figure/guess a riddle or something, before letting them pass?

Because you already have a lot of dino's fighting battles, as it is in the story! I would like to see something where Littlefoot or one of the others using his or her brain to guess a riddle or something like maybe having more brain's and less brawn for at least one part of your Twilight Valley story.

[Cancerian Tiger]

2.) Deimos and his gang capture an enemy sickleclaw use interrogation/torture to extract the information.

 

This should definitely happen.  Also, I was thinking about what the end for Ms. Maia and Procella should be like, and here's what I came up with.  From a safe distance, perhaps Rime or another biped should injure Ms. Maia and Procella by doing some "sniper" work.  There should be a few fast-biters with the protagonists who are ready to feast.  I say the protagonists, including a rescued Ducky, should beat the crap out of those two before the fast-biters take them out the way Ducky's poor brother was murdered.  This time, maybe, the two should be dismembered alive before decapitated to truly make them suffer.  A "Karma comes back around" scenario like this would be good.  I hope this helps ya out .

[Serris]

Dark Pterano

Hmm. I like the idea of a riddle instead of combat. Only, what would that riddle be?

---------------------------

Cancerian Tiger

Well, the closest equivalent to sniper rifles in Twilight Valley are blowguns (called hollow reeds in the story) and they rely on poisons to kill. However, I could have Deimos or Strut nail them with stones or stone throwing knives.

But remember that Ducky has been starved and beaten; it's unlikely she'd be strong enough to fight either of them.

I am having Ms. Maia survive this only to die later by Strut.

As for the fast-biters ripping Procella apart, I though that it would seem more interesting if the "commander" of Cloud Island orders Procella's death for failure.

I wavered between having Ducky muster enough strength (during the fight in the interrogation cave) to jam a stone knife into Procella's neck and cut her throat so severely that Procella is nearly decapitated (but still alive).

Another end I envisioned for Procella was that Deimos pin her to a tree with a few spears... and leave her like that. Note that this will probably not be combat related; they'll do it to her out of sheer spite.

As for the interrogation/torture, that's probably the most likely one as Rime knows that Ducky and Chomper are being held there but he does not know the location of Cloud Island. Also keep in mind that Rime is also a prisoner.

As to where they get the prisoner, I had originally intended that the prisoner be an invader into the meadow but I thought it would be better if Deimos and co. actually go to the Great Valley and kidnap an enemy sickleclaw for info.

---------------------------

I have also toyed with the idea of "recruiting" some dinosaurs from the Land of the Mists.

[Cancerian Tiger]

Oops, I did not think about Ducky being starved and beaten .  Your ideas there sound good just the same.

[Dark Pterano]

I think I might have a riddle, that maybe you could use in your story Serris.

(Riddle) I'm all around you! I'm in both the sky and on the ground, what I'm I?

(Answer) Air

[Serris]

One other thing, should the expedition team be forced to go near the Great Valley to get to the Land of the Mists?

Also, as an update, Rime has been captured by a Great Valley patrol.

And the expedition team is extremely small: Raptix, Ali, Littlefoot and Strut. I have considered adding Spike or Cera or one of the 3 Bullies.

Would it be better if it were a team of 4 or a team of 5?

[Dark Pterano]

I kind of think five would be better then four, but as to who it sould be I'm thinking either Hyp or maybe another adult like, lets say Hyp's father and/or maybe Pterano! Just in case they have a run in with some flyers like Rinkus and Sierra or maybe even Strut's brother Ozzie, who really know's who and/or what they might run into?

Plus that way you could do another couple of small time fights between Strut and Ozzie as well as Pterano and Sierra, both in the same chapter. But that's up to you though on both the five or four thing and about who it sould be, I guess.

[Serris]

I just realized that Spike and Petrie haven't been getting too much action.

Petrie is justified (Great Valley Air Corps) not much air to air combat going on now.

Spike is a little harder. Any suggestions? I am considering placing him on the expedition team.

Ovius is being considered but he's a "gunner" for the Great Valley Air Corps.

-------

Update:

1 OC flyers (Coatal) will accompany the group but its still in the air whether I should have Spike join as well.