The Gang of Five
The forum will have some maintenance done in the next couple of months. We have also made a decision concerning AI art in the art section.


Please see this post for more details.

Fanfictions

Cyberlizard

  • Ducky
  • *
    • Posts: 2271
    • View Profile
    • http://raptoid.deviantart.com/
I have writer's block too. o_O  That's why it took me two months to post chapter 25 and 26.  And a few weeks to post 27, and my computer died so I had to do chapter 28 at school. o_O;;


f-22 "raptor" ace

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 6832
    • View Profile
so what do you think of my recent bit of my story i'm writing? i liked your recent up date of your story. gonna get back to work on my story now.



Malte279

  • The Circle
  • The Gang of Five
  • *
    • Posts: 15608
    • View Profile
    • http://www.ineinemlandvorunsererzeit.de.vu
No offense meant, but with quotation marks " it would be much easier to tell who is talking, when another character starts talking, when a character stops talking, when talking stops altogether etc.
There is room for improvement.  :yes


Cyberlizard

  • Ducky
  • *
    • Posts: 2271
    • View Profile
    • http://raptoid.deviantart.com/
Well, yeah.  I forgot about that part that Malte just mentioned..  ^^;


f-22 "raptor" ace

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 6832
    • View Profile
i've done a bit of editing to the bit of the 6th chapter of my story.


Keni

  • Spike
  • *
    • Posts: 341
    • View Profile
    • http://www.fanfiction.net/~sorawtk
Hello there! I also have a few LBT Fanfictions to show! I know DarkHououmon, Cyberlizard and the new member, KingdomKey23, are familiar with them.  :P:

I'll be posting the threads with them shortly.


KingdomKey23

  • Ducky
  • *
    • Posts: 1088
    • View Profile
I am also interested in typing some fanfiction, displaying A Land Before Time fanfiction which ironically is a crossover between Kingdom Hearts 2. A Time Before Twilight, look out for it in the future. :lol

Quote
Hello there! I also have a few LBT Fanfictions to show! I know DarkHououmon, Cyberlizard and the new member, KingdomKey23, are familiar with them

Can't wait to see your's Keni, or as I know you better as Sora W.T.K. XD

And to Threehorn I want to say you're my personal hero. I too have a bit of a disbility, but I was always scared that people would think of me differently. But you had no fear to show it. You're one cool guy and that shows a lot of inspiration! B)


f-22 "raptor" ace

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 6832
    • View Profile
i'll post a full chapter of my story tommorrow. i've gotta work on homework now later! The story i'm working on now has a few references to my next story.


f-22 "raptor" ace

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 6832
    • View Profile
i've just started chapter 7 i'm gonna get back to work on it.


f-22 "raptor" ace

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 6832
    • View Profile

f-22 "raptor" ace

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 6832
    • View Profile
curently editing my story will post edited chapter tomorrow.  My story's turning out good.


f-22 "raptor" ace

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 6832
    • View Profile
I shall post an edited chapter tonight. (note this story has breif references to my next story.)(Yea first chapter posted!)


f-22 "raptor" ace

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 6832
    • View Profile
(Before I start I will point out this is an edited version of chapter 1.) (Without further adue I'll get started with my fanfic)
                   The Land Before Time Ali's Return
                      Chapter 1
    What do you want to do littlefoot?  I don't know cera. What do you want to do?  I don't know.  What do you want to do ducky?  I do not know.  What do you want to do petrie?  Me no know.  What do you want to do spike?  I don't know.  Meanwhile 3 miles from the great valley.  Mother is it true that we're going to the great valley?  Yes it is ali.  Suddenly 10 extermely hungry raptors attacked.  Then another raptor appeared but instead of attcaking ali's herd it defended it.  It swiftly defeated the other raptors after defeating them the raptor left ali's herd alone.  'What just happened," asked ali.  "I don't know," replied ali's mom.  3 hours later.  "Look the entrance to the valley," said ali's mom.  "Well it look like you made it," a voice of mystery said.  The herd turned around and there was the raptor that saved them.  "Who are you," asked ali's mom.  "Well you can just call me by my nickname kid is what they call me," the raptor responded. "Where do you come from," asked ali.  "I come from a place called laven valley," the raptor responded. I have never heard of such a place.  The older one said "I have been there." "Have we met before," asked the raptor. "We have a long time ago," replied the older one. "Oh yea I remember now we were the first one's there," replied the raptor.  "What happened to it," asked ali.  "I'd rather not talk about it," replied the raptor. "Is the question insdescreet," asked ali. "No the question isn't insdescreet but the answer might be," replied kid.  "Uh kid we have to enter the valley now," said ali's mom.  I understand tell littlefoots grandpa I said hi for me ok,"said the raptor. "Alright i will," replied the oldone.  Me see ali she back! "She is petrie,"asked littlefoot. Yes me see her! "Hello littlefoot, said ali.  Hello ali, replied littlefoot. "Oh there you are littlefoot Come eat your breakfast," said grandpa.   Oh it's good to see you again ali.  "It's good to see you again grandpa longneck, oh by the way the old one wants to talk to you," said ali  Ok I'll go talk to her.  Meanwhile in the land of mists.  "Hey kid you there," asked pops.  "Yes sir I am here," replied kid  "I need to talk to you," said pops.  Why do you need to talk to me? How long have we known each other?  70 years why do you ask?Well I just want to talk as we haven't talked in a long time.  I know but... "Well if it isn't the raptor duo" said itchy.  "Oh no not those two again," said kid.  "We have had enough suprises today," said pops.  It looks like we'll be full for a while dill.  "Really I don't see anything," replied dill.  The two raptors attacked taking them both out.  Meanwhile miles away.  "So we're going to the great valley bron, asked shorty.  "Yes we are,"  replied bron.  "Well let's get going, replied one of the other longnecks.  Four days later.  "Are we there yet bron," asked shorty.  "No we are not there yet shorty," said bron.  At that moment 20 hungry raptors struck.  Two more raptors appeared and they attacked the other raptors defeating them.  "We mean you no harm longnecks," said pops.  "Are we suppose to beleive that," asked bron.  "Can you just trust us," replied kid.  Why... roaring in distance.  Great twenty large sharpteeth.  "They only hunt in two's and three's," said bron.  "These are not your typical sharpteeth," replied pops.  "Yea right," replied shorty.  "Look you can either come with us or we can leave you to the other sharpteeth," said kid.  "Ok we'll come with you," said bron. so they run from the area with the larger sharpteeth hot in pursuit. (What do you think?)(expect reference to next story in next chapter.)


F-14 Ace

  • Member+
  • Cera
  • *
    • Posts: 3670
    • View Profile
You may want to tell who is talking.  I had some difficulty understanding who was saying what.  Other than that, it looks good.


f-22 "raptor" ace

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 6832
    • View Profile
It's more clear on who's talking.  Now for chapter 2 which I will post tonight.


f-22 "raptor" ace

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 6832
    • View Profile
(Here's chapter 2.)
"Hey ali what up," asked petrie.  "Nothing much petrie," replied ali.  "What do you want to do," asked petrie.  "Why don't we play tag," suggested ali.  "Me no it," said petrie. "Not it," said littlefoot.  "Not it," said ducky.  "Well I'm not it," said cera.  "I'm not it," said ali.  "spike's it, said everyone.  Just then a old swimmer entered the valley.  "So this seems like a good place to take control of, this is where my campain will begin," said Havanaman. Oh man locals I'd better play it cool. "Hello I am Havanaman what is your name threehorn," asked havanaman.  "I'm known as M.R. threehorn aroud here got that," said mr threehorn. Can you be quiet!  Why you... uh notices littles grandpa. Sorry about that starnger.  "It is alright I don't mind, where I come from if your friend said that he would be banished. Oh well I don't know what to say.  "You needn't say a word kind sir," replied havanaman.  "I come from elka," said havaman.  "Elka oh yes I fought in that war," said grandpa.  "What side did you fight on," asked havanaman.  "The ostein side of course, replied grandpa.  "What side did you fight on," asked grandpa.  I did not fight in that war.  "Really," asked grandpa.  "Yep," replied havanaman.  "Now I'll be getting some rest since I've had a long and tiring journy so if you'll excuse me," said havanaman.  Of course.  Hmm I shall soon take control of this great valley.  Then I'll take control of the world with my sharptooth army.  Meanwhile else where.  "Are they still following us," asked bron.  kid looks back to see the larger sharpteeth burst through a large bunch of trees. Yes they are still following us! "We need to stop them," yelled pops. "Yes but we need some help now," replied kid.  At that moment 4 more raptors appeared. The six raptors with some help from some of bron's herd defeated the larger sharpteeth.  "Hey kid is that you," asked frank.  "Sir," commented kid.  "It's been a long while," replied frank.  "Yes it has sir," replied kid.  "Stop calling me that," Shouted frank.  "Ok," replied kid.  What's in that area over there kid? I don't know frank.  Let's find out what is over there.  "Uh kid pops who are they," asked bron. "Oh this is frank joe smith and charles,' replied kid. Nice to meet you all. Likewise.  So are we going to see what's over there?  Right let's get to that now.  as they walk away. "It's been twenty years since we've talked," said frank.  "Yea it has been twenty years, replied kid. A few feet behind. "Can we trust them bron," asked shorty.  "We haven't given them a chance let's give them one," replied bron.  Ok we will. A few feet ahead. "Kid get down," said frank. "We'll have a better view from that ridge," said kid.  "What do you see down there," asked frank.  Sharpteeth hundreds, no thousands.  "Looks like someone wants to take over the world," said frank.  Yes but who? There is only one that I can think of who could arrange this havanaman.  "But he's dead," said kid. "Or so we're ment to think," said frank. Do you think he's already at the great valley? If he is we're going to need a lot of help.  They walk quickly back.  "So what was there," asked bron.  Oh nothing was there.  Pops joe smith charles I need to talk to you, and speaks to them in sharptooth language. "Havanaman is not dead he has rallied a sharptooth army, get a hold of everyone else kid and I will escort the longnecks to the valley," said frank. "Right away," replied pops.  (That's chapter 2!) (I'll post chapter 3 later.)


f-22 "raptor" ace

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 6832
    • View Profile
Anyone esle want to review what I have so far?


Ptyra

  • Member+
  • Cera
  • *
    • Posts: 3183
    • View Profile
    • http://z8.invisionfree.com/The_Valley/index.php?
I think I'm going to do one that has Petrie's teen cousin, Ptyra. Poor girl doesn't have a mom (she died before she hatched), has no siblings (taken by "eggstealers") and she was seperated from her dad in the Great Earthshake (guess who her dad is  :lol: ?)

She's been looking for him ever since, migrating from herd to herd, even meeting the one he was with before he was banished! When she gets to the valley (torn up from a fight she got into with some sharpteeth) all she can say and think is "Where's dad!?" When she finds out where her dad is, she's devastated. She is soon reunited with her cousin Petrie, and proposes they go to the Mysterous Beyond to find him. It is a mad idea, but the gang all agree that her father should know that she is alive. So, they embark on an adventure to the Mysterous Beyond. Can they find Ptyra's father or is he really gone (dead gone)?


landbeforetimelover

  • Member+
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 8495
  • Littlefoot
    • View Profile
    • http://www.thelandbeforetime.org
I am working on a lbt fanfic.  Unfortunately, it always get's pushed to the back burner since I am now working on 3 lbt backwards videos, a realistic LBT comic, and am now attempting to participate in Action9000's singing of 'bestest friends".  I will get around to finishing it though.  It's just not on my highest of priorities right now.  I am about 12% finished with it and it is about 22 pages.