Insane Cafe

The Great Valley Guardian · **Reply #100 on:** December 05, 2007, 07:42:39 PM

Longtail looked over and said "Wow...that is one deadly tentacle, so mister lord....are you going to use that fancy sword of yours to kill that thing?" Omnivorous looked down at the flyer and said "Maybe your right...after all my last beer is wearing off...so..." he activated his lightsaber and activated the green blade, and walking into the kitchen and a few moments later a girly, fearful scram left the room as the sith lord walked out, looking like a ghost.

"Great now I'm dead...I wonder..." he said aloud he pointed his hand forward and out shot force lighting! "Yes I still got it!" he cried as an innocent customer was fried by the Force Lighting shot by the sith.

"Well you seem to be happy provided your now dead." said Longtail as he finished another beer.

Nick22 · **Reply #101 on:** December 05, 2007, 08:12:50 PM

"I'dlay off the beers from now on sir.. always in moderation" a nearby waiter said. as he exited his table with the orrder. Meanwhile, on the Scooby Table, Dixie was trying to comfort maurice. Nick came by after finally finishing his sweeping duties. "We have a spare cot over by the employee enterance that we use for tired or sick patients. Put him on there and I'll go get the drugs kit. " Despite the crappy food, the resteraunt had a pretty good supply of medicine. Considering how often injuries happened at the insane cafe, it was a necessity.

Raptor · **Reply #102 on:** December 05, 2007, 10:09:55 PM

Another, background waiter was shot it the head by an enraged customer. Anno stared as the man shot another waiter, then lept up and shot the crazed customer in the head. FINALLY. Said Death. THEY'RE DIEING AT THE RIGHT TIME. He reaped the souls. The Death of Rats said SQUEAK. Then, he headed of to the kitchen, reaped several Rat souls(they fell in the soup) and headed back. SQUEAK EK EK EK SQUEAK! The Grim Squeaker said. The Raven said "The Rat says those rats died early." Numerous Watchmen were in the resturant at the time. One was human. He had the papers to prove it and everything. At that moment, the voaracious Sasquatch who lived upstairs came down and clubbed a customer, then dragging him back upstairs to put him in the freezer for later consumption. Everyone who could see him looked at Death. He took a bite of pie and said WHAT? HE IS NOT YET DEAD.

The Great Valley Guardian · **Reply #103 on:** December 06, 2007, 02:03:50 AM

The newly christened Force Ghost Omnivorous said "Ya know Death....I can take care of him for you! Ya know a little Force Lighting goes a loooooong way."

AvestheForumFox · **Reply #104 on:** December 06, 2007, 08:50:07 AM

Aves had finally returned from saving another customer from the paranta plant in the food storage. He looked around the kitchen and wiped away some sweat

"Another normal day" he said and returned to the kitchen

"Oh great that stupid soup cracken's been eating the customers again"

he sighed and started to douse some eggs into a bottle of thick vinegar

"I really need to quit this stupid job" he said to himself, looking all glum

ooc: exactly how I felt this morning getting off work =P

Raptor · **Reply #105 on:** December 06, 2007, 09:59:11 AM

Death said ODD. YOU DIED AT THE CORRECT TIME, BUT YOU ARE NOT DUE TO BE REAPED. WELL, PERHAPS YOU COULD FURFILL SOME DUTY.. PERHAPS WHEN BOTH ME AND MY GRANDDAUGHTER ARE INDESPOSED, YOU CAN REAP THE SOULS. He continued BUT FOR NOW, IT IS MY DUTY. The Death of Rats added SQUEAK. Death heard a scream, then headed up the stairs. A few moments later, he reappered. THE SASQUATCH AT HIM EARLY, THEN DIED OF THE HIGH LEVEL O TOXINS IN HIS PREY'S BODY FROM EATING THE FOOD HERE. WE MUST FIGURE OUT WHAT THOSE AUDITORS ARE BUILDING. "Well, the Rat said it was some sort of big thing with lots of electric nodes and stuff." Said Anno. "Maybe we should-" Outside, a man slammed into the window, made an odd gurgling noise, and slid down the glass pane. Moments later, the wall of the cafe opened up and ate him. Death disappeared, reaped the man's soul, and then reapeared. WHAT A PECUILAR PLACE. Death said. He asked a nearby waiter WHAT DROVE YOU TO CHOOSE THIS SPOT FOR A RESTURANT?

Kor · **Reply #106 on:** December 06, 2007, 11:05:54 AM

A chronal disturbance appeared in a corner away from everyone. It soon formed into two figures. A troodon (with some clothes on) and a human, though the human had bone white skin as if he had no blood left.

"Well at least it's not a swamp like last time." Marcus Darkwood said. "You don't know what long exposure to swamp water can do to dead flesh. If I weren't dead I would have found the place discusting and to hot."

The troodon looks around, "It appears we have appeard within an eating establishment, and the more correct term to reply to yourself is undead since you are a zombie." He said.

"Zombie detective if you want to be exact but who cares, at least we're out of the swamp." He said.

The troodon looked at his wrist which had a bracelet looking thing from his wrist to near his elbow. "chronal levels?" He said and a holographic display showed some readings in his language, "It does seem that Douglas's chronal energy is rising, but I was correct at being able to rechannel it so he need no longer be shunted around at random, though fine control is not yet under full control." He said.

"Meaning you can't control it very well yet. You should have built a flying car or something, we would keep out of the elements." Marcus said.

"A flying time traveling automobile, what a ridiculous idea, besides there would be no room for my tail in those human designed seats. Now a small 1 room shed perhaps would be feasible." The troodon said.

Manny Cav · **Reply #107 on:** December 06, 2007, 12:26:41 PM

The infamous Benjamin Oliver Newman George Oldhaus (often called Bongo Oldhaus by those that know him) walked him. He was an immigrant from Germany, but he wasn't full-blood German. No one really knew his true decent. Not even himself. He was comically obese and wore one of the flashiest red shirts one had ever seen, with equally flashy gray slacks. He walked over to a barstool without much thought and said embarrassingly loudly, "I WANT TO EAAAAAT!"

Raptor · **Reply #108 on:** December 06, 2007, 12:32:27 PM

"That was rather... odd." Said Anno. The Death of Rats said, in asset, SQUEAK. Death nodded, and said AGREED. The Raven chimed in. "Would you look at the eyeballs on the blo-" SQUEAK! "Fine, fine."

Nick22 · **Reply #109 on:** December 06, 2007, 03:12:58 PM

Nick, Dixie, and Scooby, carried Maurice to the cot near the back enterance, where Nick gave him a shot of painkiller. "that should ease the pain. Someone will have to watch him to make sure nothing tries to eat him" He said. "So you have things here" Dixie began "Yes, that like to eat the customers.. and staff. Scooby i would not advise you to use the the men's bathroom, for example. Many customers have used the bathroom , and not come out." Scooby turned pale. "Roes rit rike rogs?' He asked. "I don't know, If I tried to ask, that would be the last you see of me.. and I'd prefer not to be eaten by the Shurlup.." "The Shurlup?' dixie frowned. "What about the ladies bathroom?' The mirror in there likes to insult the ladies who use it" Nick replied. "you won't get eaten, but you WILL get insulted.."

The Great Valley Guardian · **Reply #110 on:** December 06, 2007, 03:17:18 PM

Longtail overhearing the scooby gang's conversation with Nick he began to laugh as he replied "Now that I would like to see! It must be fun!" Omnivorous smiled like a child as he repeated Death's words "Substitiute soul reaper....WAH-HOO!!!!!!!!!!!!" This is the greast day of my after life! Thank the force!"

Manny Cav · **Reply #111 on:** December 06, 2007, 03:24:17 PM

Just the most loud-mouthed waitress who ever lived burst out into the dining area and yelled out, "I HERE GOT SOMEONE'S SUPER ROOTY TOOTY FRESH 'N FRUITY. DID SOMEONE HERE ORDER A SUPER ROOTY TOOTY FRESH 'N FRUITY? YER GONNA BE A LOSIN' IT IF YA DON'T COME UP AND GET 'YA SUPER ROOTY TOOTY FRESH 'N FRUITY. OH, WELL, BACK WE'S GO!" She dashed back into the kitchen like nothing ever happened.

Nick22 · **Reply #112 on:** December 06, 2007, 03:34:53 PM

Scooby and the others are far away from Longtail. He cannot overhear their conversation from that distance)
Dixie frowned better to be insulted, than deads I say" She looked at Shaggy. "What?' "could you take car of Maurice for a little bit/ I'll take over caring for him in a half hour." Oh, Fine, but where arevyou and Scoob, going, back to the table?' Shaggy winked at Scooby. Dixie caught the wink, but pretended she didn't notice. 'yes, as a matter of fact we are.." She said...

Raptor · **Reply #113 on:** December 06, 2007, 03:53:45 PM

Suddenly, several bird-like humaniods entered the cafe. They all sat down at the same table, and Anno said "Well, would you look at that. Jackals." Then, the Jackals exploded. One of the windows smashed in and a Grunt, with it's methane tank alight, zoomed through the cafe and landed in the sausage maker. Death went to reap the souls of the various Covenant that had appeared. SQUEAK. Said the DOR(Death of Rats). Anno said "I'm not having the sausages from here. Not that I was before, but now it's made out of Grunts..." Anothe customer appeared. A Waiter, named Joe, went to atend to him. "What would you like to drink?" Said Joe. The customer said "I would like a Cuppa Joe." Joe flinched, twitched, screamed, and ran to the kitchen. There, he tripped and fell, and landed in a giant coffee bean grinder. A few seconds later, another waiter came out with a cup of coffee. "Here is your coffee, sir." The man took it, and noticed a nametag saying 'HI, MY NAME'S JOE' float to the top. The man pushed it away. "And I'm not having the coffee from here, either." Said Anno.

Nick22 · **Reply #114 on:** December 06, 2007, 03:59:09 PM

(may I remind you guys there is a thunderstorm outside the cafe and it is growing worse?)
Rain from the thunderstorm outside blew through the open windom, soaking nearby guests. The wind howled, it was getting stronger and it was getting difficult for the waiters to keep thier balance.

Nick22 · **Reply #115 on:** December 06, 2007, 04:24:25 PM

Scooby and Dixie returned to the table, and ordered a pair of pies. This time, they got coconut cream and triple chocolate. Nick, who they had come to like, brought in the pies, which were still steaming. "You really like the pies don't you" Nick smiled. As he said this a gust of cwind struck him, and it was then he noticed the brioken window. "great" He muttered. "Excuse me..' He ran up to the head waiter, who was standing at the front "Activate the emrergency binds Jeff. we've got a whopper of a storm coming in." nick said. Jeff nodded and pressed a blinking buttom. There were a series of long clangs as dark shield drpopeed into place over the windows including the broiken one. This stopped the bloewing rain and wind, for now at least.

The Great Valley Guardian · **Reply #116 on:** December 06, 2007, 04:25:50 PM

Quote from: Raptor,Dec 6 2007 on 02:53 PM

Suddenly, several bird-like humaniods entered the cafe. They all sat down at the same table, and Anno said "Well, would you look at that. Jackals." Then, the Jackals exploded. One of the windows smashed in and a Grunt, with it's methane tank alight, zoomed through the cafe and landed in the sausage maker. Death went to reap the souls of the various Covenant that had appeared. SQUEAK. Said the DOR(Death of Rats). Anno said "I'm not having the sausages from here. Not that I was before, but now it's made out of Grunts..." Anothe customer appeared. A Waiter, named Joe, went to atend to him. "What would you like to drink?" Said Joe. The customer said "I would like a Cuppa Joe." Joe flinched, twitched, screamed, and ran to the kitchen. There, he tripped and fell, and landed in a giant coffee bean grinder. A few seconds later, another waiter came out with a cup of coffee. "Here is your coffee, sir." The man took it, and noticed a nametag saying 'HI, MY NAME'S JOE' float to the top. The man pushed it away. "And I'm not having the coffee from here, either." Said Anno.

(

Too funny! Cuppa Joe!)

Longtail and Omnivorous were still sitting at the table when the wind picked up. They however continued to drink the few cups of beer on the table (and please don't ask how a force ghost is drinking beer...he just is

)...when a bolt of Lighting bounced off a satalite dish and just before the metal shutters closed, struck Longtail in his head as he went for another sip of beer...and well you can imagine the results...KABOOM! The talbe had been destroyed but Omnivorous was holding the beers with the force and drinking from his cup at the same time.

Nick22 · **Reply #117 on:** December 06, 2007, 04:39:36 PM

Nick rushed over to Longtail's side, the bolt had struck him the side of the head, and had singed off some of his skin. He was conscious luckily. Nick motioned to Anno and Stripetail, who were sitting nearby, to come help him with Longtail. "Please help me with him. He's heavy" He said. "And someone needs to tell everyone who is sitting by the windows to get away from them.."
_ Stripetail stood up pulled out his stuff and pointed it at himself. Vocus Magniforum. The spell magnified his Voice. EVERYONE! YOUR ATTENTION pLEASE" He boomed, :eVERYONE SITTING AT TABLES CLOSE TO THE WINDOWS ,MOVE AWAY FROM THEM PLEASE! WE ARE EXPERIENCING A SEVERE STORM< AND WE DON"T WANT ANYONE INJURIED FROM FLYING DEBRIS OR GLASS! THAT IS ALL!" Stripetail Undid the spell as the window tables were emptied of patrons.

Raptor · **Reply #118 on:** December 06, 2007, 04:41:09 PM

Death reappeared. I MAY BE GONE FOR A FEW MOMENTS. He said. BUT I SHALL BE BACK. The DOR, the Raven, and Anno bade him farwell, and Death exited the resturant. Outside, the storm tore a path of destruction. I NOW UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU ARE. Death said. The storm crackle with thunder. THE AUDITERS CREATED A UNIVERSAL STORM. The storm shot lightening, but Death blocked it with his scythe. HOWEVER, YOU ARE DUE TO DIE TODAY. AND IT IS MY DUTY TO REAP YOU SOUL! A white horse appeared, and Death mounted it. He spurned it to fly into the storm. Meanwhile, in the warmth of the cafe, the Gnomes and gathered atop one of the waiters and were clubbing him. Anno helped oversee the patients, as was a new, female Sangheili who had arrived mements before the lockdown.

Manny Cav · **Reply #119 on:** December 06, 2007, 04:48:01 PM

The loudmouth waitress known as Martha went back to the Scooby gang's and, looking at Scooby, said, "Motesa?"

Manny was still observing the goings ons and he rushed through a dictionary from the underworld to better understand what Martha said. He got the answer he wanted and continued to gobble away at his cheesecake.