The Gang of Five

Beyond the Mysterious Beyond => Caption This! => Real-Life Captions => Topic started by: Noname on December 18, 2009, 03:22:21 PM

Title: Billy Mays...
Post by: Noname on December 18, 2009, 03:22:21 PM

(http://roflrazzi.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/celebrity-pictures-billy-mays-sell-mother.jpg)

Never mind the text already there...

Title: Billy Mays...
Post by: WeirdRaptor on January 07, 2010, 02:55:00 AM

But the already existing text can serve to inspire.

And lo, to the horror of all viewers at home, the ad continued:

"They can pleasure you for hours! Believe me, I know!"

"But wait, there's more! They also come with a discipline kit for nights they give you that lame "I'm tired" excuse! It is a very delicious method..."

"For only $12.00, you can also get a vat of bleach and several jugs of water, complete with a pulley system to dangle them over it with! Why do that? Simple, force feed them the water, and eventually they'll have to piss! The ammonia from their urine will mix with the chlorine bleach and become what was known in World War I as Mustang Gas! So as they hang there for hours without end, enduring the agony of having to go. They will have to make a decision. Let themselves go and die a horrible death or endure it. It is then that they will know the extent of my pain. PAIN!!!"

Viewers: :bolt

Title: Billy Mays...
Post by: Lillefot on January 07, 2010, 06:41:51 AM

Hi! Billy Mays here!
Call right now and order the big city toilet, the new wireless toilet, for only 99.99!

Title: Billy Mays...
Post by: 2007excalibur2007 on January 07, 2010, 08:02:17 AM

HAI BILLY MAYS HERE FOR THE ORIGINAL BILLY BURGER STATION - THE FAST AND EASY WAY TO PRESS AND COOK DELICIOUS BILLY BURGERS WITHOUT BREAKING YOUR BACK!!!

(R.I.P Billy Mays, 1958-2009) :cry

Title: Billy Mays...
Post by: Littlefoot1616 on January 07, 2010, 09:30:22 AM

The smile I don't trust,
that twinkle in his eye says he's up to no good,
but that BEARD! UGH! Just screams evil!
...EVIL!!!

Title: Billy Mays...
Post by: Lillefot on January 07, 2010, 10:38:34 AM

Must... resist... BUYING!!!

Title: Billy Mays...
Post by: 2007excalibur2007 on January 07, 2010, 11:11:26 AM

BUT I'M NOT DONE YET! CALL RIGHT NOW, AND WE'LL SEND YOU A FULLY-LOADED 80,000lbs TRACTOR TRAILER - JUST PAY SEPARATE SHIPPING AND HANDLING!

Title: Billy Mays...
Post by: Noname on January 27, 2010, 05:14:48 AM

Hai Billy mays here with suicide putty! I tested it on myself!