The Gang of Five
The Land Before Time => LBT Fanfiction => Topic started by: joshua1127 on April 11, 2011, 04:03:03 PM
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Hi, everyone Vonboy rewrote The Land Before Time Journey to a New world for me. I am working on chapter 2 re writes to make it understandable with a little help with Vonboy. cause he and I are working on this together.
:DD I hope you like this cause I sure do. :DD
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THE LAND BEFORE TIME: JOURNEY TO A NEW WORLD
My name is Alan Texan, and my story begins in the 21st century in Kansas City, Missouri. At The Great University at Rockgurst; me and my twin brother, Jay Texan, were working on a strange device in the labs of the University. We called it the Time Laser, and it was supposed to be a time travel device. We spent many months of research at the University, and many more long months of failure after failure. One time, I thought we almost had it. We tried putting rubies, sapphires, emeralds, ambers, diamonds, chromite, jades and quartz separately in the device, like a battery. At first, the device powered on and seemed to be working, but then our experiment blew up in our face, literally. We took out one lab of the University, and were almost kicked out for it. After another failure using Chromite and Jades, we were almost ready to give up.
We decided to try one last time. By combining a ruby, an amber, a sapphire, an emerald, pink quartz and a diamond all together, we created a new mineral. We tested this new mineral, and it was a success! We called this essential stone the Rainbow Stone, A multi-colored stone containing red, pink, yellow, white, green and blue. It was a beauty.
Me and my brother showed this new device to the U.S. Government, General Russell Young presiding. We told them how it worked, and they were very intrigued. The Government tried a test where they inserted the Rainbow Stone inside the Time Laser, and aimed the laser very carefully at a fossilized tyrannosaur skull. A bright light flashed the room, and the chairs of the Government Committee stared in amazement at the stop on the ground where the ancient skull used to be. My brother explained how the skull was still in the same spot it was at before, but over 100 million years in the past. There was a rousing round of applause from the Committee chairs.
In the Dinosaur world, a Fastrunner named Ruby, and the little T-rex she was protecting, Chomper, were exploring their home, the Secret Caverns. They were getting bored, and they were about to get back close to the entrance to get some sleep, when the tyrrannosaur skull appeared out of thin air on the rocky ground. Both of them were shocked.
The next morning, they told Littlefoot and the Gang about the mysterious skull, and they were in disbelief. Littlefoot brought it up at a meeting the grownups were having at the Great Circle. The dinosaurs did not know what to think of it. Some, like Littlefoot’s grandparents, Tria, and Mr. Thicknose, believed Littlefoot. Others, like Mr. Threehorn, Couldn't believe it. He said "Just sounds like a sleep story to me. There is no way something like that could have happened!"
Back in the 21st Century, Me and Jay were called to the White House for a special meeting with the higher ups in the Government. The President said that this time device was extremely dangerous in the hands of the public, and that it should be in their hands for the country's protection. He added "If news has gotten out about this, other countries will be on the hunt for this device, and there's no telling the damage that could be done if this device is to fall into the wrong hands."
Both of us were against this idea. I told them myself that we would keep the device under our protection. It was OUR creation, and no one else was going to tell us what to do with it.
Back in the Great Valley, Littlefoot and his friends began to check out the Tyrannosaur skull, which in the Dinosaur World was called a sharptooth skull. With the help of Mr. Clubtail, the Gang was able to be slowly and carefully get the skull out of the Secret Caverns, and into the Great Valley, where everyone could see it. This skull fascinated the Valley's inhabitants, since it was so different from any skull they ever saw before. It appeared to be made out of stone, and not out of bone. One of the grownups said "This isn't a real skull, is it?" Another replied "It must be. There’s no way a rock could look anything like that!"
Grandpa Longneck told Littlefoot and his friends to run along and find something to do while the grownups try to get to the bottom of this.
In the 21st century, me and Jay were at a hotel, at room 123, Having supper and organizing our clothes inside drawers. While organizing, Jay saw a green button on the side of the Time Laser. I never told Jay what this button was for, so I guess I can't blame him when he pressed it and made the Device disappear. I was still angry at him and tried to blame him for it anyway.
I explained to him afterword’s what the button was for. That button sends the Time Laser itself to the past. Then when someone presses the button, they will be teleported with the device back to the present. He asked me why I put a button like that on the device in the first place, and I told him that I thought we might need it someday.
Back in the Great Valley, Littlefoot and his friends were playing a game of kick the pointy seed. Littlefoot's team was about to win, when the Time Laser appeared right in front of him. He stopped in his tracks, petrified. Chomper came running over and said. "It happened like that, just like that! The little thing just appeared out of nowhere like that sharptooth skull did last night!."
Everyone was scared of this device, everyone that is except Littlefoot; "let's show this to the Grownups!" He said. He tried to pick up the strange device with his mouth, but in doing so, he accidentally pushed the green button with his teeth. In an instant, Littlefoot disapeared with the device.
"LITTLEFOOT!" Cera screamed as she ran over to where Littlefoot just was a moment ago. Littlefoot was gone, and his friends were in shock.
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Yeah, I'm helping Joshua with his fan fiction now. He's still pretty much controlling the plot, and what happens in the story, and I'm spicing it up some to make it easier to read and more exciting.
BTW, I noticed a bunch of little errors I made in that first chapter. :bang I'll send you a fixed version soon.
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Thank you Vonboy :DD
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I won't lie. The story is super simplistic in some areas. Some things don't make sense. The characters introduced the device to the government instead of the scientific community. etc. It would have been nice if THEY went back in time instead of littlefoot time traveling. Also the transitions from 21rst to the GoF's time wasn't done well. The device of that complexity wouldn't be designed at a simple university. If the government were interested in the device, they would steal it outright. I'll also say that instead of stating "me and this guy" you should write "This guy and I." Some other small typos as well. There are other things, but I'll leave it at that.
This story was READABLE though, and consistent in it's way of story telling.
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:DD Thank you Campion1 :lol I want ya to know that there's more to come in this story and I'm working on it still. Plus, I am thinking about drawing illustrations to it. ;)
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Hi Everyone Here's chapter two where Littlefoot is in the 21st century. I hope you enjoy it :DD :DD
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THE LAND BEFORE TIME: JOURNEY TO A NEW WORLD
CHAPTER 2: "DINOSAUR ON THE LOOSE"
Littlefoot woke up and found himself in a strange place, The Dinosaur Exhibit Union Station in Kansas City. The first thing he noticed was how the place appeared to be a cave, but it was very different from any cave he had ever been in before. Littlefoot gasped when he saw hundreds of strange two-legged creatures walking around. They had no tails, came in a variety of colors, and seemed to have fuzzy stuff on their heads like the little fuzzy creatures he'd seen before. He was baffled by the whole scene.
One of the strange creatures saw Littlefoot' and screamed. Other creatures started running away in fear, while a few just stood there, looking at the young Apatosaurus. Littlefoot was so scared, he darted off. He charged down a hallway, knocking down things by accident. He came to a hole in the wall. He tried to run through, but was blocked off. "What’s going on?" he thought to himself. He backed up a few steps, and jumped through the hole, breaking the glass that was blocking his way. He dashed down the street in panic. Police officers tried to grab him, but Littlefoot was too big to catch by hand, even though he was still very young and small for his species.
Jay and I had come back from Washington D.C. and we grabbed a copy of the daily paper to find the headlines read "Dinosaur on the loose, Citizens in panic!" Jay had a look of shock as he read the paper over my shoulder. "Could it be? Did we do that?" We read some more of the story, which read.
“At 8:16 AM this morning, at the Dinosaur Exhibit Union station, Citizens were shocked to discover one of the dinosaurs on exhibit was not just a pile of bones. James Markus, a patron on the scene, commented that "The Dinosaur just appeared out of nowhere, without any warning. It then ran off. It probably was as scared of us as we were of it." The dinosaur caused over 25 thousand dollars of damage at the exhibit before escaping into the streets.
Police attempted to catch it, but couldn't. "We've never seen anything like it before." Commented one of the officers. "We weren't prepared for something like this!"
We interviewed General Russell Young, a very prestigious member of the national Government. This is what he told us.
"The dinosaur is still on the loose. It appears to be a young Apatosaurus, probably weighing several hundred pounds. This species of dinosaur was strictly herbivores. Even so, a wild animal on the loose can be very dangerous. Citizens are instructed to stay away from it if they see it. Call the police immediately; they will deal with this situation safely."
“Well,” I replied, “Looks like a dinosaur found our time device and came here into the 21st century” “let’s just hope no one found it and messed with it.”
We arrived at the exhibit the next day, and found the Time Laser. "It's a relief no one found it!". The device looked a little scratched, but not badly damage; Just some teeth marks, probably from the Apatosaurus.
After that, we went on a search for the young dinosaur. We grabbed another paper that said the dinosaur was still on the loose. We looked everywhere we could think of, but the dinosaur was nowhere to be seen. After 5 hours of searching, we gave up and went home. Our next door neighbor, Robert Jones, was at the front door of our house. "I saw the dinosaur!" He exclaimed. "It ran into your house, down into your basement. I think it's still down there."
Littlefoot was hiding in the corner of a small dark cave. At least that is what Littlefoot thought of it as. He heard the door he smashed down earlier being moved, then footsteps. He was shaking uncontrollably with fright. Two of the strange two-legged creatures, with long dark brown fuzzies hanging from their heads, walked down into the cave, and approached him. He had nowhere else to hide. The only thing he could think of was trying to reason with these creatures. In a feeble voice, he let out "Pl...Please don't hurt me!"
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Here is Chapter 3. :DD You might find this one a bit funny :lol
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THE LAND BEFORE TIME: JOURNEY TO A NEW WORLD
Chapter 3: Littlefoot Sleeps with Alan and Jay
Mine and Jay's eyes popped out. We never could have imagined that a Dinosaur could speak. We looked at each other, and I decided to slowly extend my hand to the dinosaur. "Don't worry, we won't hurt you." The Dinosaur replied "You won't?" he stretched his head out and sniffed my hand, which kind of tickled. He asked us where he was. "That's kind of hard to explain." Jay replied. "For one thing, you’re in our home." The Dinosaur lowered his head. "I'm sorry, I was scared and I didn't know where to go." I told him it was ok. I then explained more about where he was, telling him about the Time Laser we built, and how that device brought him to the future from the Mesozoic Era. Littlefoot looked really confused and a little scared when I explained this.
Me and Jay decided to keep Littlefoot for a while. Littlefoot agreed. He was interested in this strange new world, and he wanted to explore it some and learn more about it.
Littlefoot went outside to our backyard while the both of us had our dinner. After a while, I wondered where Littlefoot was. We walked outside, only to see our backyard was ruined! Half a dozen bushes were stripped clean of their leaves, and a small tree was knocked over from Littlefoot trying to get to it. Littlefoot said he was sorry, he was just very hungry. We said it was ok. We understood. We decided to spend the evening taking Littlefoot to a nearby forest on the back of our pickup truck.
When Littlefoot got there, He was pleasantly surprised by thick place. It was just a forest, a place that he could relate to. He set out and ate his fill. He met a little squirrel, or a fuzzy as his kind called it. Littlefoot asked him about the humans. "I don't really know much about them. I try to stay away from all of them." Littlefoot was surprised that there were other creatures here that were afraid of humans. He walked back to the truck to see me and Jay had spent some time piling leaves into the back of their truck. "It's for tomorrow." They said. Littlefoot layed down on the bed of leaves in the truck, and they went back to the brother's house.
That night, Littlefoot walked up to me and Jay, while we were sitting in wooden chairs in front of a fireplace. He asked where the other Dinosaurs are. Jay got a somber look on his face. "There aren't any more." Littlefoot was shocked to hear this. He asked what happened. "We think that a long time ago, there was a great disaster that killed all of the dinosaurs. The only reason we know about dinosaurs is because we've dug up dinosaur bones and studied them over the years. A human has never seen a live dinosaur before. This is the first time." Littlefoot, still very confused, asked "When did it happen?" I replied "You don't have to worry, Littlefoot. This happens a very long time after you. You won't see it happen, or your children, or your children’s children." I was right. The asteroid that killed off all the dinosaurs happened several tens of million years after the time Littlefoot came from. This consoled Littlefoot a little bit, but he was still very sad after hearing all of this.
That night, Littlefoot tried sleeping on a rug in our room, but he was very lonely. He never slept by himself. He always slept with his grandparents. Even when he was on adventures, he had his friends with him. Littlefoot got up and climbed up on our bed. He settled down, and was almost asleep, when he heard a crack. Jay woke up and said "What was that?" Suddenly, the bed crashed onto the floor. Littlefoot said that he was sorry yet again. We grabbed some sleeping bags, and slept on the floor with Littlefoot.
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Joshua will be writing Chapter 4. I'm to busy writing for my fanfiction, especially since I gave myself a deadline, and I really want to make this one a good one.
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;) That's Right Everyone, I am working on Chapter 4. firstly on paper and I am gonna PM it to Vonboy to see if it needs some fixing and a little more detail cause I trust him as a friend and an editor.
Chapter 4 will be about Littlefoot knowing about Halloween.
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:confused dose any one have any comments on "The Land Before Time: Journey To A New World"? To be Honest? :confused
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Here's Chapter 4 Vonboy and I worked on. I think some of ya will find some good action in it.
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The Land Before Time: Journey to a New World
Chapter 4: Halloween Party
The next Morning me and Jay took Littlefoot out around the neighborhood. We put Littlefoot on a leash and he thought it was kind of weird, but I said it was for his own good, to keep him safe. Around the neighborhood, many Halloween decorations were being set up, from ghosts, to jack o' lanterns, to witches, vampires, bats, spiders, and all manner of orange and black paper and paint. "What are those?" Littlefoot questioned. "What? Oh those," I replied, "Those are decorations. People are preparing for Halloween."
Littlefoot gave a confused look and asked "What is Halloween?" I explained the story behind Halloween while the trio trotted down the street.
"Halloween is an annual holiday observed on October 31, which commonly includes activities such as trick-or-treating, attending costume parties, carving jack-o'-lanterns, bonfires, apple bobbing, visiting haunted attractions, playing pranks, telling scary stories, and watching horror films. Trick-or-treating is a customary celebration for children on Halloween. Children go in costume from house to house, asking for treats such as candy or sometimes money, with the question, "Trick or treat?" The word "trick" refers to (mostly) a "threat" to perform mischief on the homeowners or their property if no treat is given. In some parts of Scotland children still go guising. In this custom the child performs some sort of trick, i.e. sings a song or tells a ghost story, to earn their treats."
"so people in this world wear costumes, what is a costume" Littlefoot asked.
"A costume is something that people wear to see what they look like or to confuse us or to surprise us. Halloween costumes are traditionally modeled after supernatural figures such as monsters, ghosts, skeletons, witches, and devils. Over time, the costume selection extended to include popular characters from fiction, celebrities, and generic archetypes such as ninjas, princesses, even dinosaurs like you."
"Well that sounds interesting but it's a bit spooky." said Littlefoot. "It's supposed to be spooky," said Jay, "sometimes being a little spooked is a bit fun, but as long as it's someone you know real well.
"Oh, I remember something that me and my friends did once that was like that." Littlefoot then went one to recount what happened a long time ago, before he made it to the Great Valley for the first time. "Me, Ducky, Spike, and petrie fell into a tar pit. We managed to get out, but we were all covered in tar! We stacked up on each other, got some sticks and a bone, and snuck up on our other friend, Cera. She was really scared of us!"
"That sounds like it was fun!" Jay laughed "I guess you see why so many of us like this holiday, then?" "Yes, I do." Littlefoot replied with a little evil laugh.
While walking on the street, they pass by a movie store with a TV showing a scary Halloween movie, When a female girl on TV screams. It Spooked Littlefoot, I knew that he started to run like crazy and we chased after the scared little Apatosaurus. Littlefoot ran through a front yard, when a rat dummy with sharp teeth dropped in front of him and screeched. Littlefoot screamed and ran faster, crashing into Halloween stands, knocking souvenirs down, and crashing into jack o lanterns. A white blanket fell on his back and a jack o lantern landed on his head which made it hard to see. He bumped into a land post and shook his head. Alan and Jay arrived and took the jack o lantern off of him. They both knew that it wasn't his fault. He just got spooked by a scream on a TV. Alan, Jay and Littlefoot saw a group of people with crossed arms and sour faces. "oops" Littlefoot replied.
Back in the Great Valley, hopes were running low. All of the dinosaurs of the Valley had been searching for Littlefoot through the night and the morning. None of them had slept any since yesterday.Ducky rushed to the others on a wet creak and says, "I can't find Littlefoot any place, oh no, no, no!" Petrie flew down from the sky and said, "Me can't find him anywhere either!" "He's got to be here somewhere," Cera replied, "We can't rest now. We still need to find him!
From far away in the distance, the Gang without a leader heard the calls from Littlefoot's Grandparents. "Littlefoot! Littlefoot! Where are you, Littlefoot!”
Mr. Threehorn, always the dissenting kind, could only think of one thing it could have happened. "That little Sharptooth had him for breakfast, didn't he?!" "I wouldn't do that to one of my friends!" Chomper relied. He had been accused of such things before, and the Gang was there this time to back him up. "Please, everyone." Grandpa Longneck said. "We have to focus on the search!"
In the 21st century, the trio arrived at Olive Street, and the brother met up with their girlfriends. Carol Cruz, my girl, was dressed in a witch costume. While Jay's black girl friend, Eliza Summer, was dressed as little red riding hood. "Hi, do you have your costumes yet." Carol asked.
I blushed, "Not yet. Me and my brother have them up in our rooms still."
"You’re going to get a kick out of surprising us tonight?" Eliza asked Jay. Jay Blushed and answers "Actually yes it'll be a surprise tonight at our party with Littlefoot here."
Eliza and Carol had already heard of Littlefoot. Me and Jay were sure to tell them about the dinosaur ahead of time so they wouldn't be surprised or scared. "It's even cuter than I imagined!" Carol exclaimed as she walked over to pet Littlefoot on the head. "My name is Littlefoot" the dinosaur replied, looking a little annoyed. The two girls then started to scratch his back, which he kind of liked. As he was being petted, Littlefoot thought about how it felt a lot like being nuzzled and snuggled by his grandparents.
Later that night, at 7:30 PM to be exact, the Halloween Party started. I showed up as English man with a top hat, while Jay Arrived, looking like a zombie english man with fake green nose on him. Robert showed up in a wolf costume with his wife Delilah Jones dressed up as a heart.
There was red punch, looking like blood, a pumpkin cake with a jack o lantern face, and meat balls looking like eyes. Other neighbors arrived in there Halloween costumes, while children were outside, trick or treating from door to door. There was creepy Halloween music, such monster mash, rocking robin, witch doctor, everything. Littlefoot watched and was amazed at what the people were doing having fun with others as someone or something they’re not.
The party was going great until the sound of police sirens were heard from outside. A knock was heard on the door. "We've heard reports of the dinosaur being seen in this house. Everyone step away from the animal, and let us take care of everything!" Littlefoot ran over to me and Jay. "What’s going on?" He questioned. "I'm not really sure, but I think you should go hide in the basement!" I replied.
Me, Jay and our girlfriends led Littlefoot down the stairs into the basement just as the front door broke down.
"Everyone down on the floor! now!" Ordered the first swat team member that step into the living room. "Leave him alone!" Jay screamed. Two of the swat team members rushed through the basement door to see the scared Apatosaurus in the arms of the two girlfriends. Carol screamed "Stop!" as one of the swat team members shot a tranquilizer dart at Littlefoot. Littlefoot could see the two women rushing forward to try to stop the men as his vision started to fade. He collapsed on the ground, and was unconscious.
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THE LAND BEFORE TIME: JOURNEY TO A NEW WORLD[/b][/u]
Chapter 5: "THE ESCAPE PLOT"
When Littlefoot woke up, he was shocked to see where he was now. He was in a large jungle looking area with several trees and a lot of foliage. From beyond there, Littlefoot could see hundreds of humans in a different environment. Most of them were staring at him. Many onlookers were taking pictures of him with flashy cameras, and all of these flashing lights scared him. He tries to run away to the other side of the jungle, but he rammed into a bullet proof Plexiglas shield. Littlefoot got up and tried to ram the glass again, but it wouldn't even budge. Littlefoot was quickly discovering that he was trapped. He scanned the faces of the humans outside again. "Nobody here is familiar!" Littlefoot thought to himself. "I don't see Alan or Jay or any of their friends! Where am I?"
Back in the Great Valley, hope had almost been lost. It had been two days since Littlefoot had vanished into thin air, and most of the residents of the Valley were getting tired of searching.
"We mind as well give up now, he's not here anymore." Urged Mr. Threehorn. "No, we can't give up!" Grandpa Longneck replied. Chomper came running up to the group of massive dinosaurs. "Found anything yet?" Grandma Longneck questioned. "No, I haven't" The little sharptooth replied. "I've had my sniffer on the ground, walking all around the Great Valley, and I can't get a whiff of him. He's nowhere near here, or I would have smelled him by now."
"This is what is worrying me the most" Grandpa piped up. "If Littlefoot isn't here, me must be in the Mysterious Beyond!" Everyone gasped. "But it's dangerous out there!" Chomper exclaimed. "There's viscous sharpteeth all over the place!" "Humph! Your one to talk!" Mr. threehorn replied.
Grandpa lowered his head, and looked melancholy. "If Littlefoot is in the Mysterious Beyond, We'll probably never find him." Ducky gasped and said "You cannot ever give up, no, no, no!" "I'm sorry, but Mr. Threehorn is right" Admitted Grandpa. "The Mysterious Beyond is a massive place. We wouldn't know the first place to look out there. It's time." The discouraged dinosaurs set back to their nests to sleep.
Back in the 21st century, Littlefoot had finally fallen asleep, when a loud clank came on the gate separating Littlefoot from the outside world. Littlefoot shot up, and saw a zookeeper walk into his cell. "Who are you?" Littlefoot questioned. "Don't worry; I'm Robert, one of Alan and Jay's friends." Littlefoot was relieved to have someone he could trust back. Robert went on to explain how he dressed up as a zookeeper in order to sneak into Littlefoot's cage. "I am just here to tell you that the three of us are working on a plan to get you out of here!" Littlefoot's hopes were raised again. "I have to go now, but hang in there! We'll think of something!" Robert left Littlefoot, and he was alone again.
Back at our house, me and Jay had decided what to do. Robert walked into the front door, and asked "Have a plan yet?" "Why yes, we do have a plan!" I said. Jay started to talk about this plan. "Now, just going in by ourselves would be foolish. We're going to need something big to break into that zoo!" "That's where we thought of Littlefoot" I added. "Littlefoot? What can he do?" Robert questioned. "Oh, he can't do much..." I started up again. "...But he's spoken to us about his Grandparents."
"Yes, two fully grown Apatosauruses" Said Jay, starting his turn. "Two gargantuan dinosaurs, weighing in at several million pounds each. The gentle giants of the Mesozoic Era! If we had them, we could break into that zoo and get Littlefoot out of there!"
Robert was intrigued by this plan. "So, who is going to go back in time to retrieve them?" "...You are!" I replied. Robert's intrigued smirk turned into a big frown. "Me?" "Yes, we think you’re the best man for the job." Jay said.
After some more arguing, Robert finally decided to go. "This is going to be very dangerous," I warned. "Littlefoot might be fairly heavy himself, but his Grandparents could smash you in a second if they think you’re a threat. You will have to approach them very cautiously, and prove to them somehow that we're all on Littlefoot's side." Robert picked up the modified Time Laser (Which could now transport people or object both ways), and pressed the green button.
In a flash, Robert disappeared. Me and Jay had done their part. Now they had to wait for Robert to do his.
That Night in the Great Valley; Littlefoot's Grandparents couldn't get to sleep, They both were very heart broken about the mysterious disappearance of Littlefoot. Grandma Longneck broke a tear and called out. "My dear Grandson, where ever you may be right now, please be safe." Grandpa Longneck came to her side and said. "There, there. I have hope that Littlefoot is unharmed." Grandpa broke a tear and they both started to have Memories from a long time ago, when they were with their daughter, Littlefoot's mother, and watched Littlefoot hatch.
(REMEMBERING SONG)
[Grandpa Longneck] Remembering. Remembering is a kind of a funny thing it makes you feel as time gone by Friends are made by saying hi but I'll always hold dear Remembering makes Reappear.
[Grandma Longneck] But even when the thoughts are sad.
[Grandpa and Grandma Longneck] We'll Always Have Remembering Our Remembering
In the 21st Century..........
[Littlefoot] Remembering Remembering is a kind of a funny thing it makes me feel as time had gone by. Like saying hello when I meet new freinds but I'll always hold dear Remembering makes Reappear, But Even as the times go by I'll always have Remembering.
In the Great Valley..........
[Ruby] Remembering Remembering is a kind of a funny thing it makes us feel when time has gone by like glad hello or sad good bye but I'll always hold dear Remembering makes reappear from good to bad or even sad I'll always have Remembering.
[Littlefoot, Ruby, Grandpa and Grandma Longneck] Our Remembering.
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Vonboy is working on the other part of Chapter 5 cause he asked me about his story part Idea and I agreed with it I'll wait till he's finished and I'll proof read it. ;)
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Lol, I thought that was supposed to be the whole chapter 5 right there :lol It seems like a pretty good stopping point to me. Robert is leaving on his adventure, and Littlefoot and his grandparents sing a touching song about how much they miss each other.
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Well, Vonboy When I looked through it I believe it is a stopping point you made and I am impressed when I wrote the song Remembering. However you told me on my PM message that you have an Idea to add in Chapter 5 and I'm allowing you to write some more and I like your Idea. I am only showing other members what you and I added. I thought it would be wise to show parts of the story to other members.
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Sorry everyone, I misunderstood Vonboy he is actually working on the 6th chapter. I am sure it'll be tripple cool. ;)
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The Land Before Time: Journey to A New World
Chapter 6: Time to Time
Back in the Great Valley, Robert materialized out of thin air. He gazed across the prehistoric landscape to discover that he was in a vast Valley with high walls all around it. Robert figured it would not be a good idea to see out for Littlefoot's Grandparents at night. He was also very tired, so he decided to go into some nearby foliage and sleep for the night.
Chomper was sitting in his cave, staring out into the starry sky. He was so worried for Littlefoot, He couldn't sleep. "Maybe the grownups have given up, but I haven't!" The little sharptooth said to himself. He got up out of the cave, and set out to search for his friend again.
Back in the 21st century, Littlefoot had fallen asleep in his cage. He woke up when he heard the singing of animals. He shot up and ran to the edge of his cage to see a multitude of animals in the cage next to his were having a meeting. Lions, Tigers, Bears, Elephants, Zebras, monkeys, Penguins, Rhinos, Antelopes, Gazelles, Hippos and Kangaroos were all crowded into the large cage. Littlefoot watched as they began to sing. They sang a song called The Lion Sleeps Tonight.
[Iguanna] Weeeeeheeeeeeeumbabumwa
[monkeys] Awemboa amwemboa awemboa awemboa awembeo Awemboa awemboa awemboa awembia
[Chimpanzee] In the Jungle the Mighty Jungle The Lion Sleeps tonight
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Chimpanzee and Iguana] In the Jungle the Quiet Jungle The Lion Sleeps tonight
[Chimpanzee] ohoooooooooooooooweumbumbawa!
[Zebra] In the Village The peaceful Village the Lion Sleeps Tonight!
[Zebra and Antelope] In the Village the Quiet Village the lion sleeps tonight!
[Chimpanzee] oooohoooooooooooweumbumbawa!
[monkeys] Awemboa amwemboa awemboa awemboa awembeo Awemboa awemboa awemboa awembia
Janice walks close to Littlefoot with Bo and they continued singing while shaking their tushes slowly.
[Zebra] Hush my darling don't fear my darling the lion sleeps tonight!
[Zebra and Antelope] Hush my darling don't fear my darling the lion sleeps tonight!
[monkeys] Awemboa amwemboa awemboa awemboa awembeo Awemboa awemboa awemboa awembia
[Iguanna] Weeeeeheeeeeeeumbabumwa
After the Song, three of the monkeys left the cage. They walked up to the gate of Littlefoot's cage, and used a key one of them had to open the gate for Littlefoot. They walked in and introduced themselves. Their names were Will, Bill and Jill. They invited Littlefoot to the other cage for the animals meeting.
They lead Littlefoot into the cage with many animals in it. "Are you a purple Giraffe with spots or something?" asked a female Giraffe. "Whats a Giraffe?" Littlefoot questioned. "I'm a Longneck. What are all of you?"
"You've must of seen animals like us before, right?" asked Elvis, a Chimpanzee. Littlefoot said that he hadn't, and that he had no idea who all of these strange creatures were who were looking at him. The animals were perplexed by this, but they welcomed in the little Longneck.
Back in the Great Valley, the bright circle had risen. Robert had slept in fairly late, since he was so tired last night. When he opened his eyes, he saw several young dinosaurs staring at him, Cera the threehorn, Ducky the swimmer, Spike the spiketail, and Petrie the flyer. Robert quickly got to his feet and stepped back. "Wh...Who are you?" Robert demanded. "Humph! We got the same question for you!" Replied Cera.
Robert said "I'm a human, and I've come because a dinosaur named Littlefoot needs help!" "You know Littlefoot?" Ducky's face brightened up. "He's one of our friends, and we've been looking for his for the past few days!" "Littlefoot isn't here anymore" Robert replied. "He's in my time now!"
"Your time?" Petrie asked, perplexed. Cera added in "What is that supposed to mean?" Robert went on to explain how he is from the future, and how Littlefoot accidentally got sent into the future with the help of the Time Lazer. Ducky said "Oh no! I think that we should take you to our parents, they will know what to do!" Robert got up, and started to follow the Gang to their nests. He was so caught up in the moment that he forgot about the Time Laser. It laid on the ground, at about the same spot where Robert had entered this world.
Back in the 21st century, Jay and I had woken up. They saw that Robert had not yet to return, and they were beginning to get worried. The brothers heard a knock at the door, and their two girlfriends walked in. "How is that little dinosaur doing?" Carol asked. "He's still trapped in that zoo." I answered. "Robert has gone back in time to see if he can bring Littlefoot's grandparents back to our time to help." "I hope that works" Carol said. "I really do worry about that poor little dinosaur." There was nothing any of them could do though, so we just stayed at our home, waiting for something to happen.
Littlefoot's situation wasn't much different. He was back in his cage, after an alarm was set off last night, and all the animals were rounded up and taken back to their respective cages. Littlefoot felt a little better today, for he had made many animal friends last night. Elvis the chimpanzee, Janice the Zebra, Bo the Antelope and the 3 red monkeys Will, Bill and Jill.
Back in the Great Valley, The gang and Robert had made it to the Longneck nest to see that both of Littlefoot's Grandparents were there. "What is going on, little ones?" Grandma asked. Ducky spoke up. "We have someone here who wants to help Littlefoot! He knows where he is!" Grandpa lowered his head down to Robert. Robert felt very nervous as the giant creature eyed him. He could feel a great wind, which was the breathing of Grandpa.
Farther away from the Longneck nest, along the edge of the Great Valley, Chomper was still searching for Littlefoot. He was starting to feel discouraged, when he saw a shiny object on the ground in front of him. It was the Time Lazer. Chomper sniffed the strange object. "This is the same rock that appeared before!" Chomepr thought to himself. "The one that Littlefoot was messing with when he and it disappeared!" Chomper's hopes were lifted again. He thought that maybe this rock could take him to wherever Littlefoot had gone too. He picked it up, and examined it. "Nothing's happening." He thought to himself. "How does this thing even work?" Chomper decided to try what Littlefoot had before, and he put the Time Lazer in his mouth. Just like before, one of Chomper's teeth touched the green button, and Chomper disappeared with the time machine.
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Chapter 7: Chomper in the 21st Century
Back at the Longneck nest, Grandpa longneck continued to observe Robert. Robert still felt the the breathing of the giant dinosaur. While thinking of what he will say, Robert put his hands in his pants pocket to get out the time lazer, but realized that it was gone.
"where is littlefoot?" Grandpa asks.
Robert got out his pocket a handkerchief to wipe the sweet off of his forehead. He was more nervous after he discovered the device was gone. He didn't know what to say. "Well, I know this may confuse you, but Littlefoot is in our time now in the 21st century."
"21st century?" The confused Grandpa Longneck exclaimed, "what in the world is that?"
"It's the time in which we humans live. I came here with a Time Lazer which I now lost by accident. Please, Littlefoot needs your help!"
Grandpa Longneck already noticed that the human was frightened of him, so he tried being gentle with him. "So, you only want to help Littlefoot too?" Robert said yes.
Out from behind some bushes, Ruby rushed out and said "Chomper is missing! I saw him..." she stops as she looks at Robert in an odd way. "What is that?"
Robert walks up to her. She shook a little with fear because this particular human was big, buff, and muscular. “I am a human and the name is Robert Jones. Ruby was still a little intimidated, so Robert continued. "I only want to help! Grandpa Longneck assures Ruby. "It's true. He says he knows where Littlefoot is, and that he can help us bring him back." Robert turns to Ruby and asks "?What is this about Chomper? He's missing too?"
"Yes, I saw Chomper disappear just like Littlefoot did a couple of days ago!" Ruby said.
"Really!?" Robert exclaimed. "He must have found the Time Laser that I lost!" He went on to explain to the dinosaurs about the Time Laser, and what it did to Littlefoot and now Chomper. "And all those stones were put together to create the Rainbow Stone. It is what gives the Time Laser it's power. That Time Lazer is how I got to your time, and how both Littlefoot and Chomper got sent to my time by accident."
All this talk of the Time Lazer confused the dinosaurs, but they didn't have much time to ask questions. Robert went on to explain how Littlefoot is now being held in a Zoo, and how him and twp brothers that he knows came up with the plan to bring Littlefoot's Parent's to his time to break Littlefoot out of the zoo.
"I'm all for helping to rescue our dear little one..." Grandpa began, "...but how do we get back to your time, as you say it, if Chomper has that little thing that can do it?"
"I don't know" Robert replied. "I guess we have no choice right now then to wait and see what happens."
Back at the 21st Century me and Jay were still at our house with Carol and Eliza. We had been waiting for Robert for a long time, when a bright light flashed from outside. All four of us ran out to find a young purple Tyrannosaur with the Time Laser in his mouth.
The two girls stepped back, because they did not know the friendly Little sharptooth. Littlefoot had told me about this interesting friend of his before, so I knew what to do. I walked out and questioned the dinosaur, "Are you chomper? A friend of Littlefoot?"
Chomper dropped the Time Laser and his eyes popped when I mentioned Littlefoot. "You know Littlefoot?" "Yes," I answered "He is being held at the zoo and we were expecting Robert to return with his grandparents."
"Why?"
I explained everything to him and it shocked him when I told him that Littlefoot is now caged up and he can't get out. "That's terrible! I have to go help him!" Chomper was about to run out of the house, but I grabbed his tail and told him "No Chomper, with that mouth full of dagger like teeth you'll cause a major panic!"
I picked up the time lazer and asked Chomper to go back to his time with me, so I could bring Littlefoot's Grandparents, but he didn't want to go. "No! I want to stay here and Help Littlefoot! "We're best friends!" "I tried to tell him that would be a bad idea, due to the fact that he was a tyrannosaur, but he didn't listen. "Please let me stay. Littlefoot is almost a brother to me, and I really want to help him!"
I didn't want to leave Chomper in our time, but I gave up. I pressed the green button on the slobber covered Time Lazer, and instantly saw the Great Valley. I could see two massive Apatosaurus's far in the distance, so I set off in that direction. It would be a long walk, so I figured I wouldn't make it there until after nightfall.
Back at the zoo, Littlefoot waited patiently as the zoo keepers closed the zoo down for the day. When the last human had left, Will, Bill, and Gill unlocked the gate to Littlefoot's Cage. "Ready for another meeting?" Will asked. "Of course I am!" Littlefoot replied. "I have been lonely all day. I really need someone to talk to. Littlefoot walked into the big cage, to see the zoo animals meeting was already underway. Littlefoot listened to the other animals talking. He was shocked by some of the things they were saying. "Humans are horrible!" Said a Zebra. An Elephant said. "They hunt other animals. Sometimes it's not even for food, but for fun! They kill animals and just leave their bodies to rot!" "I miss my family." a Kangaroos said. "They caught all my whole family, and I was the only one sent to this zoo." An angry Lion added in "They act like they're so much better than us!"
"They aren't all bad! "Littlefoot spoke up. "Before I was sent to this zoo, I was with two brothers. They were very kind to me. They even wanted to help me get home!"
Back in the Great Valley, Robert was still at the Longneck nest with grandpa and grandma. All three of them were beginning to get worried. I had been a while since Chomper had presumably gone to present times. The gang had heard of what had happened earlier that day, and they came to wait at the nest as well.
As I walked up to the Nest, I noticed that Littlefoot's grandparents weren't the only ones there. Robert was there, of course, but there were also many young dinosaurs of various species. I introduced myself to the dinosaurs. When I finally asked the grandparents to come with us to the future, grandpa interrupted. We can't head out right now! It is nighttime already, and none of us have had much sleep for the past couple of days. I say we all take a rest. We need it! I didn't want to argue with a 50 ton dinosaur, so I agreed.
Tomorrow, we would finally head out and try to rescue Littlefoot.
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Hi everyone Vonboy completed Chapter 7 and he is writting chapter 8 and I am working on three chapters 9, 10 and 11. wish us all triple :goodluck :goodluck :goodluck on the LBT story novel. ;)
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:DD What do you think of the these remaining chapters that me and Vonboy worked on so far? :D
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Chapter 8: The Escape
Back in the 21st century, at the brother's house, The girlfriends and Chomper were chatting while patiently waiting for Alan and Robert to return. It was late at night, but no one was ready to go to sleep yet. Jay walked into the room, carrying several steaks that were still packaged. "We have these for you, Chomper." "Thanks, Chomper replied, "But I eat mostly ground crawlers and buzzing fliers." "That might be true," Jay replied. "But we can't let you outside right now. You would cause even more of a scene than Littlefoot did." Chomper ate his meal, and went to sleep. Jay and his girlfriend stayed up a little later to talk.
The next morning, in the Great Valley, The dinosaurs, Robert and I woke up. What was left of the Gang had spent the night at the Longneck nest. Grandpa said it was time to go. I said "We should go back to where we entered this world, so we will end up near our house, and be able to meet up with everyone else." The old Longnecks let me and Robert crawl on top of their heads, and they headed off for the edge of the Great Valley. The gang followed.
Back in the 21st century, everyone at the house jumped up when a very load stomping sound was heard from outside. They rushed outside to see a strange sight. Along the street were two gigantic Apatosauruses touching tails. Robert and I were on the head of one of them, with Robert on the head of the other. Both of the dinosaurs lowered their heads to let their human passengers off. "Well, here we are." Grandpa Longneck said.
“We'll have to get this done fast." I said. "The sun is setting, so we should make it to the zoo by the time it closes." The two longnecks took off towards the zoo.
Back at the zoo, Littlefoot couldn't sleep. He had never been away from everyone he knew for this long before. Will opened up the dinosaur gate, like before, but Littlefoot didn't feel like coming out this time. "What's wrong?" Will asked. "I just don't feel like talking to anyone right now." Littlefoot replied.
"Is it because of what everyone else said last night?" Will questioned. "No." the longneck replied. "I just feel like being alone right now." Will looked worried, but he left Littlefoot alone. Littlefoot looked up at the sky, wondering if he would ever see his friends and family again.
Somewhere in the city, we, the rescue group, were running toward the zoo. Many bystanders looked on in shock at the two gigantic beasts, which were traveling down a business district. “Maybe I should have thought this through more." I thought to myself. Two large Apatosaurs were causing a much greater panic than the young one did previously. These two huge dinosaurs could easily kill if they wanted to, and that put fear in the hearts of all the onlookers. "We better hurry!" I called out to the rest of the group. "From the looks of things, we might have the police or even the military on our tail soon!"
Back at the zoo, Littlefoot was going to sleep. Will had come back into his cage, and was snuggling the dinosaur to try to make him feel better. Littlefoot had just closed his eyes, when a slight rumble on the ground would be felt. Littlefoot opened his eyes, and will asked "What's going on?" "Is there anything here that can shake the ground that much?" Littlefoot asked. "No. Elephants are pretty big, but they couldn't be shaking the ground like this!"
Littlefoot looked out of the cage to see his grandparents walking towards him. His eyes lit up. "Grandpa! Grandma!" Will backed away at first, scared of such huge animals, but he came back when Littlefoot said he knew them. Grandpa walked up to the cage the young one was in, and called out. "Littlefoot!" Grandpa shattered the cage with his immense tail. Littlefoot darted out and snuggled with his Grandparents. Chomper got off of Grandma's back, and ran over to hug Littlefoot. "Chomper! What are you doing here?"
"I wanted to help save you!" The little sharptooth replied. Grandma longneck picked up the two little dinosaurs by biting their tails, and placed them on her back. As they were starting to leave, cries for help were heard from the other animals in the zoo. After Littlefoot asked grandpa to help them, he used his heavy tail to smash the other cages in the zoo. Then he knocked down a good sized section of wall so they could escape.
As the animals started to run amuck in the city, even more of a panic was ensuing. "We need to get out of here, and fast!" I said. I picked up the Time Laser, but just as I was about to use it, A bullet whizzed through it. I looked in the distance to see General Young standing down the street, with several dozen soldiers behind him. I took a quick look at the Time Laser. It was not seriously damaged, but damaged enough where he couldn't use it at the moment.
"What do you think you’re doing?" General Young called out to the group. "Were trying to save the little dinosaur you had trapped here!" Jay called out. "We're taking him home!" "You broke into a zoo," the General began. "...caused thousands of dollars of damage, let a plethora of dangerous animals loose, used that time travel device when we told you not to, brought dangerous beasts from the past here, and to top it all off, put everyone in the this city in grave danger!" General Young stopped for a moment, and then gave the order to charge.
The soldiers behind him darted forward. They pulled out their guns, and tried shooting at Littlefoot's Grandparents. This wasn't very effective, as the bullets simply bounced off the two longneck's tough hides. As the soldiers drew near, Grandma used her tail to smack them back. The soldiers became discouraged and retreated.
"Are we going to go back, Alan?" Grandpa asked. "Not right now, I'm going to have to fix this Time Laser first." we left the city and headed for a forested area to rest. All the dinosaurs ate dinner, the leafeaters eating some foliage, and Chomper finding a bees nest and some ground crawlers. The dinosaurs then went to sleep for the night. Me and Jay stayed up that night. They spent several hours trying to fix the Time Laser to no avail. Just then, a single human cautiously approached the group. It was the General. He tried to look as inviting as he could as he said "I would like to call a ceasefire. I'm here to apologize for mistreating that little dinosaur; I think he's called littleneck or something." Everyone was kind of taken back by the offer to stop the hostilities. Jay and I didn't know how to respond to this. Me, Jay, and Robert decided to get together to talk it over.
While they were talking it over, unknown to them, dozens of soldiers were slowly and quietly taking positions in the dense foliage, waiting for the General's signal.
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I am working on chapter 9, 10 and 11 after that the LBT story is completley ;)
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This is a very interesting story you two have written,albeit a good one. I hope to read more of it in the future.
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Thank you Belmont2500, I am working on 3 chapters 9, 10 and 11 and I am struggling with ideas of what should happen next. but we are doing our best to complete it. ;) Wish me tripple good luck ;)
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Good story, my favorite part is the first meeting of littlefoot and the brothers in chapter 3. i can't wait for read the next chapter.
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I am glad and pleased that you like Vonboy's and I's LBT story I think you'll like chapter 9. I can't tell you what happens nexted it's gonna be a suprise. ;)
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I'll just say that I've been enjoying collaborating with you on this story. I've never done a group project like this before. It's been a lot of fun.
And it's good to hear people are reading it and liking it, thanks guys. :DD
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:lol: I am completely pleased Vonboy and I am glad that it's fun for you. It's been fun for me too. :DD
I am still thinking and still working on the chapters still and I think it's gonna be a great success don't you think? :DD
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Can't believe it's been almost a month since the last chapter :blink: Both me and Joshua have been pretty busy, and we've had to talk back and forth quite a bit for this chapter, since we were both looking for ideas. I think chapter 9 is ready to show now, so I'll just post it. I hope Joshua doesn't mind me posting it this time :lol:
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Chapter 9: The General's Chat
Littlefoot, his Grandparents, Chomper, and the humans were in their little circle for several minutes, discussing about General Young's strange change of behavior. The group finally broke up, and Alan turned to face the general. "Explain yourself!"
The General cleared his throat, stalling for time, then he started on his explanation. "Our Reactions on Littleneck..." "My name is Littlefoot!" The little longneck corrected the General. "sorry, Now where was I? Oh Yes; Our reactions on Littlefoot may have gotten a little out of hand..."
"Out of hand!?" Jay began. "look General, I don't know if We should trust you or not, but what ever it is you are plotting against these two apatosaurs or longnecks as they call themselves, and this little...tyr...sharptooth, they will give you a lot of severe damage if you go through with it!" Jay Threatened.
The General got up, crossed his arms and scowled at them. Grandpa and Grandma Longneck glared at the general from eye to eye, but from a far distance. The General then grunted in fustration, knowing that he couldnl't possibly control Littlefoot's grandparents.
Chomper got curious when the general kept looking behind him. Chomper sniffed the air with his sniffer. He got a very strange smeel through his sniffer. Strange to a sharptooth at least. He looked far in the distance and spotted a shining object. Chomper realized that the general was not alone. "I don't trust this...whatever he calls himself." Chomper piped in. "I don't think he's alone."
The General got up and was about run, but he decided not to. He said "Now let's not start anything irrational!"
"Better be sure!" Grandpa Longneck grumbled closely at General Young.
General Young backed off to get some personal space. Littlefoot asked. "what do you want from me?"
General Young popped his neck, got a little smile on his face and continued.
[The General's Rap Song]
(General Young): 1, 2, 3, 4 Now our plan is pure and simple. We plan to use your device that the boys used with disobedients! But I must confess you twin boys are pure geniuses!
(Alan) If your talking about the time lazer, we refuse!
(General Young) Refusing will not work around me. I just might have do a number on you!
Alan punched the general, and he fell on his back.
(Jay) So saying that you might have to do some damage on us. I think it's the other way around. It sounds like your planning to make time go topsy turvy!
General Young got up with a black eye.
(General Young) Topsy Turvy is only child's stuff!!! but our plan is pure and simple. We plan to use your device that the boys used with disobedients, but I must confess you twin boys are pure geniuses!
(Chomper) I just don't get you General. Your just talking like a sharptooth! so what is your plan?
(General Young) The plan is pure and simple Chomper tooth. We plan to use your device that the boys used with disobedients. but I must confess the twin boys are pure geniuses they brought you here in the 21st-
The General could continue no longer, for the massive tail of one Grandpa Longneck had knocked the wind out of him.
"Are you trying to stop the General from playing out his plan, Grandpa?" Littlefoot asked.
"No, I just had to make that annoying little thing shut his mouth!" Grandpa replied.
"Thanks! I was about to do something myself." Alan said.
The other soldiers retreated with their leader when Grandpa Longneck tail whipped General Young. Grandpa longneck laughed. "They are just a bunch of cowards!"
That Night, me and Jay went right on back to work on the Time Lazer while the dinosaurs were resting. we were both getting very droopy but we couldn't sleep because of Littlefoot's grandparent's loud snoring, or sleep rumbles as they called it. After a long night, the time lazer was finished. When we were ready to go to bed, 3 animals appeared. Janice the zebra, Elvis the Chimpanzee and Bo the antelope.
Littlefoot felt the breathing of Janice and he woke up. "Hello Littlefoot." Janice smiled and blinked her eyes. "Janice, Elvis, Bo what are you doing here?"
We heard the 3 animals talking to Littlefoot but we couldn't understand them at all because we were too sleepy. We both hit the grown, and went right into a deep sleep. Not even Grandpa Longnecks sleep rumbles could keep us up at that point.
The Next morning me, Jay and Robert woke up and heard Littlefoot, Chomper and the Grandparents talking with the animals.
"So, the humans captured you as well?" Grandma Longneck questioned in worriness.
"Um...no. Our parents were captured by the humans and we were born and raised in that zoo as well." said Janice.
"We are used to the humans thanks to your grandson." said Elvis.
We started to realize that the dinosaurs could communicate with the animals and We were impressed. we couldn't understand animals, we could only understand the dinosaurs.
We announced that morning that The Time Lazer was finally completed. Everyone cheered, Even the 3 animals, who didn't really know what was going on. we decided to run a few tests on it first to make sure it was working wight.
I picked up the Time Lazer, and pressed the red button on the side. Everyone, including me, were in for quite a shock...
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nice story, you two! Give yourselves a pat on the back!
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Chapter 10: Return to the Great Valley
As we and the group of dinosaurs headed back to the past, they noticed that Cera, Ducky, Petrie, Spike and Ruby were standing right in front of them. The kids who were left behind were overjoyed to see Littlefoot and Chomper back and well. The Gang was together again.
They quickly realized that they were back in the Great Valley. Littlefoot was overjoyed to be reunited with his friends and family again. The grandparents thanked us for our genius hard work. Littlefoot's friends went over to Janice, Elvis and Bo, looking confused. Cera asked "What kind of Dinosaurs are you?" Janice questions "what's a dinosaur?" "You don't know what dinosaur is?" Petrie asks, "Nope" Elvis answers "This is just a surprise to see more than one up close. Your friend Littlefoot here is the first one we ever met."
The other adults arrived on the scene, as the animals from the future were questioned by the curious dinosaurs. So many questions were asked, that the three animals grew tired of answering them all, and decided to take a break.
One thing no one noticed was another human that somehow stowed away on the trip through time. He quietly sneaked off to the side into some dense foliage.
That night, At the Great Meeting Circle, Littlefoot told the story about his journey to a new world. Cera was annoyed that she said, "We had to stay in this boring valley while the longneck went on an adventure!" Petrie was relieved he didn't go. "Sounds scary!" Ducky was relieved that Littlefoot was back, and that no one was hurt. Spike was more interested in a pile of treestars. Ruby said "Sounds a little like an adventure I had myself in the Mysterious Beyond!" All the same, they were all fascinated the tale, except maybe Spike. Most of the adults were there too, listening to the story. Me, Jay and Robert stayed for the meeting, commenting on Littlefoot's story, and telling parts of the story from our points of view.
As Littlefoot finished his epic, it started to rain heavily. The dinosaurs called it the days of rising water. the meeting was still going on. Me, Jay and Robert went under Grandpa Longneck to stay dry. Mr. Clubtail showed up with the fossilized Tyrannosaur skull and I was surprised to see it again. We didn't say a word about it because we didn't know if that could mess up history or not.
The next morning after the meeting, Littlefoot and his friends showed us the majestic view of the Great Valley, from a very tall cliff at one side of the immense valley. Everyone was relaxing, enjoying the sights, when suddenly The General jumped out of a bush. He pulled a pistol out of his pants, and pointed it at me.
"Hand over the Time Lazer!" The General threatened. "Who are you?" Ruby asked.
The General takes a shot at Ruby, but the bullet darts in between her legs. The gunshot was heard from across the valley. Littlefoot's grandparents recognized that sound. "The General in the Great Valley?" Grandma Longneck exclaimed. "We must warn the others!" said Grandpa Longneck.
Cera charges at the General and knocked him to the ground. The general kicked Cera off of him. I tried to pounce on him but the General rolled over and quickly got back up. The General gave 3 punches on me on the sides. Thinking quickly my brother punched General Russell Young under his chin. The General was still standing, he held his mouth and he spits out a bloody tooth. The General growled and punched Jay in the stomach. It was so painful that Jay went on his knees.
The General picked up the pistol and pointed it at Jay's forehead. "Give Me the Time Lazer now or you're finished!" he threatens.
Chomper growled and chomped down on General Russell Young's Leg. The General cried out in pain while trying to shake the little sharptooth off. Littlefoot then pounced on him and stomps on him with all his strength, knocking the wind out of the old general. He grabs Littlefoot's Neck and strangles him. Robert punched him on the side that he lets go of Littlefoot. I pounced on General Young and I punched him a lot. With one Hard Punch General Young blocked it and headbutted me. I slipped, and almost fell off the edge of the cliff. I grabbed the edge, as everyone else looked at him in helplessness. The General walked up close to the edge and said "You're finished!" When General Russell was about to finish me off Littlefoot charged towards him from behind.
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Vonboy and I are almost finished with this LBT story and chapter 11, the final chapter is still being worked on. :DD
What do you think of chapter 10, so far? ;)
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Yeah, I hope we can get it done and posted sometime next week.
Also, just for a little fun, here's the chapter 10 that Joshua wrote before I edited it.
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Cera, Ducky, Petrie, Spike and appeared infront of them. At first They were very happy to see Littlefoot again.
They quickly realized that they were back in the Great Valley. The grandparents thanked The Texan Brothers for there geinus hard work. However Littlefoot's friends went over to Janice, Elvis and Bo and Cera asked. "What kind of Dinosaurs are you?" Janice questions "what's a dinosaur?" "you don't know what dinosaur is" Petrie asks, "Nope" Elvis answers "this is just a suprise to see more then one up close, Your friend Littlefoot is the first one we met"
the grown ups arrived and the animals were now into it now. they asked the animals the questions and they were getting tired of answering so they just took a long break.
At night, Littlefoot was sure happy to be reunited with his friends again that he told his story about his journey to a new world. they were sure fasinated by it and I couldn't blame him that he met me, Jay and Robert.
All of a sudden it started to rain heavily, which the dinosaurs call it the days of rising water. the meeting was still going we went under Grandpa Longneck to stay dry and then Mr. Clubtail showed up with the fossilized Tyrannosaur skull/the stone sharptooth skull way to and I was suprised to see it again.
We didn't say a word about it cause it might ruin history.
After the meeting Littlefoot and his friends showed us the great view of the Great Valley but suddenly The General Appeared with a pistol in his hand pointing at Alan.
"Hand over the Time Lazer" The General Growls and threatens. "who are you?" Ruby asked.
The General fires at Ruby but the bullet hit in between her legs. the gun fire sound was heard from a mile away and Littefoot's grandparents recognized that sound. "The General in Great Valley?" Grandma Longneck says in shock. "We must warn the others" said Grandpa Longneck.
Cera charges at the General and the General fell to the ground. He kicked Cera off of him and I pounced on him but the General flips flipped. Me and The general got up and the General punched me 3 times on the sides. Thinking quickly I punched General Russel Young under his chin. The General was still standing. He held his mouth and he spits out a bloody tooth I was suprised about that. The General growls and punched Me in the stomach. It was painful that I went on my knees.
He picked up the pistol and points it at my forhead. "Give Me the Time Lazer now or you are finished!" he chuckled crazily.
Chomper growls and he bites General Russel Young's Leg. The General tries shaking him off. But then Littlefoot pounced on him and He stomps on him with all his strength. The General grabs Littlefoot's Neck and strangles him. I punched him on the side that he lets go of Littlefoot. I punched General Young a lot.
With one Hard Punch General Young blocks it and headbutts him. I slipped and the General came close and sayed "You're finished." "I'm not finished you are!" Littlefoot Charges at the General and headbutts him. The General loses his balance and he fell over the edge of the cliff. He grapped my leg; Littlefoot grabes my sleeve with his mouth but sinces it was raining he struggles to pull Alan up...
(He wrote some more stuff after this, but I cut it off here for a cliff hanger.)
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Yeah, I hope we can get it done and posted sometime next week.
Also, just for a little fun, here's the chapter 10 that Joshua wrote before I edited it.
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Cera, Ducky, Petrie, Spike and appeared infront of them. At first They were very happy to see Littlefoot again.
They quickly realized that they were back in the Great Valley. The grandparents thanked The Texan Brothers for there geinus hard work. However Littlefoot's friends went over to Janice, Elvis and Bo and Cera asked. "What kind of Dinosaurs are you?" Janice questions "what's a dinosaur?" "you don't know what dinosaur is" Petrie asks, "Nope" Elvis answers "this is just a suprise to see more then one up close, Your friend Littlefoot is the first one we met"
the grown ups arrived and the animals were now into it now. they asked the animals the questions and they were getting tired of answering so they just took a long break.
At night, Littlefoot was sure happy to be reunited with his friends again that he told his story about his journey to a new world. they were sure fasinated by it and I couldn't blame him that he met me, Jay and Robert.
All of a sudden it started to rain heavily, which the dinosaurs call it the days of rising water. the meeting was still going we went under Grandpa Longneck to stay dry and then Mr. Clubtail showed up with the fossilized Tyrannosaur skull/the stone sharptooth skull way to and I was suprised to see it again.
We didn't say a word about it cause it might ruin history.
After the meeting Littlefoot and his friends showed us the great view of the Great Valley but suddenly The General Appeared with a pistol in his hand pointing at Alan.
"Hand over the Time Lazer" The General Growls and threatens. "who are you?" Ruby asked.
The General fires at Ruby but the bullet hit in between her legs. the gun fire sound was heard from a mile away and Littefoot's grandparents recognized that sound. "The General in Great Valley?" Grandma Longneck says in shock. "We must warn the others" said Grandpa Longneck.
Cera charges at the General and the General fell to the ground. He kicked Cera off of him and I pounced on him but the General flips flipped. Me and The general got up and the General punched me 3 times on the sides. Thinking quickly I punched General Russel Young under his chin. The General was still standing. He held his mouth and he spits out a bloody tooth I was suprised about that. The General growls and punched Me in the stomach. It was painful that I went on my knees.
He picked up the pistol and points it at my forhead. "Give Me the Time Lazer now or you are finished!" he chuckled crazily.
Chomper growls and he bites General Russel Young's Leg. The General tries shaking him off. But then Littlefoot pounced on him and He stomps on him with all his strength. The General grabs Littlefoot's Neck and strangles him. I punched him on the side that he lets go of Littlefoot. I punched General Young a lot.
With one Hard Punch General Young blocks it and headbutts him. I slipped and the General came close and sayed "You're finished." "I'm not finished you are!" Littlefoot Charges at the General and headbutts him. The General loses his balance and he fell over the edge of the cliff. He grapped my leg; Littlefoot grabes my sleeve with his mouth but sinces it was raining he struggles to pull Alan up...
(He wrote some more stuff after this, but I cut it off here for a cliff hanger.)
Well.... I write a lot to get better at writting stories and when ever I get done with a chapter on the LBT story I let Vonboy proof read it. :yes
Now I am allowing Vonboy to write the final chapter, chapter 11. I think you all will like the whole story. ;) :yes
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This fanfiction has been nominated by its author to be rated for the fanfiction awards 2011. To all the readers and fans of this fanfiction, please rate and review (http://www.gangoffive.net/index.php?topic=9467) it! :)
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Chapter 11: The Ending
On the very high cliff, I was dangling by his fingers, with the General now holding onto my leg. "I'm not finished you are!" I yelled out to General Young. Suddenly, part of my pants ripped from my leg, and the General plummeted a thousand feet down to his death. As his screams for help faded away, I started to slip myself. Littlefoot quickly bit onto my hand to try to pull me back up, but it wasn't enough. me and Littlefoot both fell over the edge.
It looked as if all was lost, when Granma Longneck ran over just in time to gently grab the dinosaur and the human in mid-air. As she slowly laid us down on the ground, everyone else made their way down the cliff to meet up with them.
"I'm so glad to see all of you little one's safe" Grandma Longneck spoke up.
"We came as soon as we heard the General making that...sound that he makes."
"It's called a gunshot." I piped up.
"Where is the general now?" Grandma Longneck prodded.
Littlefoot lowered his head and said. "Well, he fell off a very high cliff. I don't think he could have made it." Littlefoot felt a little sorry for the General. He always did when anyone died, even a bad person.
"At least he can't bother us anymore!" Jay said.
As everyone took a moment to take a breather from all that had just happened, more of the adults of the Great Valley congregated at the scene. Any action in the Great Valley attracted attention, since the valley was usually such a quiet and peaceful place. Everyone there didn't know what to think of the action they experienced. The prehistoric denizens never heard a gunshot before.
Grandpa Longneck replied, "Please everyone! Please calm down!!!" and they all remained silent. "I have seen this happen before by the humans when they tried to kill us. Those...bullets have no effect on us though. They are small, and they just bounce off of our skin. At least we won't hear from them again. We now know that not all humans are bad.
"That's right!" Chomper spoke up. "They aren't all bad, just like not all sharpteeth are bad!"
"That is very true, Chomper" Grandpa continued. "They are animals like we are. They have good sides and bad sides!"
The dinosaurs all looked at, Robert, Jay, me and the other Zoo animals that came along. Littlefoot came up to me and said "I want to say thank you for bringing me back!" "you're Welcome Littlefoot” I replied.
Littlefoot noticed now that I looked quite sad. "Why are you so sad, Alan?"
"Because this is where this is where we say our good bye!" I reported.
"Why?" Littlefoot asked.
"Littlefoot...let's just say that there won't be anyone to bother you anymore!"
"But Alan!..."
I gave a long sigh. "No buts Littlefoot, I can't be with you anymore. You belong here, with your family, and all of your friends. I...don't belong here."
Littlefoot broke a tear and rubbed his head on Alan's legs. "I am gonna miss you too much!"
I broke a tear as well, but remained calm. "We are all going miss you too. Littlefoot, we both live in two different centuries we live in the 21st century and you live here in Mesozoic world.” I rubbed my eyes and continued, “You are a longneck, if we took you back they’ll be others in our time that'll take you back to the zoo. We can't let you come the 21st century. It is no place for a dinosaur like you. It's just too dangerous for you."
Littlefoot understood, but that didn't stop the tears from streaming down his face. "Don't forget about us!" littlefoot sobbed.
I put my hand on Littlefoot's head and said. "We won't forget about you, we promise!"
Janice, Elvis and Bo went up to him and Janice said. "Farewell Littlefoot!"
"You were great kid!" said Elvis.
"We won't forget about you or this adventure you gave us!" Bo added in.
As we and the animals prepared to go back to their time, they looked back at the huge group of dinosaurs seeing them off. We paid special attention to Littlefoot.
Before I pressed the button on the Time Lazer, I called out to the little longneck one last time. "Well, who knows? We just might decide to come back sometime!". With that, We and the zoo animals disappeared instantly, leaving behind an empty and barren patch of ground.
Chomper walked up to Littlefoot, and tried to comfort him with a brotherly hug. Littlefoot thought about the last thing that Alan said. Would they perhaps come back someday? It was anyone's guess, but Littlefoot wanted to believe that they would.
THE END
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I wrote the beginning and the ending of this chapter, but got writer's block, so I sent it to Joshua. He wrote the middle, and posted it.
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Looking back on this story, I see how badly it was written lol. I get what Pterano said about that aspect of it. I'm sorry Joshua, as some of that was my fault. I didn't really proofread this as much as I should have. Whatever I sent to you, you seemed happy with, so I just kept it up like that :lol
Also, Joshua kept writing in first person (mostly), and I preferred third person, so I would try to rewrite his chapters in third person if I could. Some of this is in first person though. REALLY messy how that turned out, and in hindsight, it looks really bad. In the end, I guess we jsut didn't collaborate on it very good.
The story itself though is still really good. I liked all human characters Joshua made up for it. As far as the story goes, my only real contribution was making Chomper a major part of it.
Would you ever want to write another LBT story, Joshua?
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Hi Everyone! :D I have just now re-written the story with the first person's point of view (Alan Texan) and it's now completley finished ;)!! what do either you think of it now? and are your favorite parts in the story?
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Hello Everyone :D
Me and Vonboy would like to have new members to read our LBT story and we are hoping you will enjoy it ;)
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If you guys do write a new one I will read it.
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I have been thinking about mailing the LBT story copie to The Universal Animation Studios.
plus I've been thinking of adding illustrations to the LBT story too ;)
do either of you have any honest suggestions? :D
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^ As a rule, big studios generally have a policy where they simply throw out any story ideas, plot ideas, character ideas, etc. They don't want to risk legal battles with the original creator, and most studios will outright state this on their personal websites. They can't know which fan is sincere and which is out to make the quick buck, so they treat all fan submissions the same. :p
Pictures are probably a good idea. They always enhance stories in my opinion. :)
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^ As a rule, big studios generally have a policy where they simply throw out any story ideas, plot ideas, character ideas, etc. They don't want to risk legal battles with the original creator, and most studios will outright state this on their personal websites. They can't know which fan is sincere and which is out to make the quick buck, so they treat all fan submissions the same. :p
Pictures are probably a good idea. They always enhance stories in my opinion. :)
Hi Pterano
when I read your message I sort of understand but I am not can you explain it a little more clearer?
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I'm Making A Moive Script That Will Include Human Chartacters. It's Called The Land Before Time/The First Humans. E-Mail Me To mjsusens@gmail.com if you would like a copy of the script. (NOTE! You May Not Send The Script To Universal Studios Or Claim It's YOUR Idea. If You Would Like To Add Anything Else To The Scirpt Is Fine. Make Sure You Send Me The New Version Of The Script. :idea