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One of a Kind

Mama's Girl

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(Alright, don't want to leave you all in suspense too long ;) So, here it is, Veck and Lar's parents true colors as well as their sons...)

XI: Judgement
 
Three sets of reunions hit the herd of searchers at the same time. Each punctuated by relief but coming out in a different way.
 
"I am gonna kill you two when we get home!" Dinah and Dana both giggled in happiness as what their Aunt Cera really said by this wasn't lost on the two little kids. Ridge's father wasn't so covering with his relieved emotions, nor was his son. All while being the oldest of the group of kids, Ridge's demeanour had been strong and capable, for them. Now, finally, he let out the tears of his hidden worry as he nuzzled against his father who soothed him in relief of his own.
 
It had never been a secret to such an observant hatchling as Harper, their Uncle Pterano played favorites. Probably unintentionally, but still he did, and Petrie was it. Of course, even without their mother's pressure, he tried to be fair to all his nieces and nephews, but still Harper actually didn't expect much as she darted over to land near Pterano.

What she got wasn't overly exuberant either, but it was stunning in it's own way. "Harper. Are you alright, child?" Pterano sighed, simply bending and laying a hand along her shoulder, but with a more open look than she'd ever seen from him and a small smile of relief. She'd never put much focus into trying to pull attention from her uncle, but now, at that look, she felt unexpected comfort flood over her.
 
"Yeah...I'm fine" she found a smile, "Thanks to Petrie and Guido".
 
Pterano of course didn't let his "favorite nephew" go without a proud smile. "Yes, I must say, while horribly worrisome for this old flyer to witness, that was quite well done, Petrie. Both on your end and your little glider friend's" he turned to give a nod to Guido, who just shrugged off the attention again.
 
Bending nearer his niece and nephew, Pterano took up both of their wrists, preparing something else to say, when the contact on her end caused Harper to flinch with a small cry of pain. Instantly both Pterano and Petrie glanced to her and Pterano glanced down to inspect the wrist he held, frowning deeply as he did so.
 
Petrie gasped and, while seeing for herself the spots on both wrists where all but two days of binding had rubbed them sore, Harper glanced aside trying to come up with some way to excuse it away. Pterano wouldn't let her do that though. "Harper, what happened?".
 
The hatchling turned back to face him and found her own strength finally falling as she let her tears come. She still tried to cover though. "I--it's nothing--" sniffling, she tried to regain control, "I was just...tied...up for a bit. I...just so I couldn't fly away...nothing...". Pterano's frown grew, as if the vines hadn't done enough damage almost causing the unthinkable to happen but for Petrie thankfully noticing the situation ahead of everyone else. Cera was noting the extent of the twins cuts and bruises as well.
 
"Mother! Father!" seeming on a type of cue, every one's attention was drawn over to Veck and Lars as the two runners now stood before their herd, looking rather pleased. It was Veck who had cried out, voice full of pride and triumph, "No longer will your future heirs of our fine herd be called inferior!" Veck went on, "We have unlocked the tricks and traits that make a spiketail, threehorn and flyer's defenses what they are! Soon we will show that insolent threehorn that even those outside of the main five known kinds are worthy to be recognized! With the skills of three of the five at least we will beat him and prove our herd better and above the known five even, since we can match any kind!".
 
Beside Veck, on the rock this speech was being given from, Lars shrugged, "We still don't know exactly how we're going to fly, but we're working on it".
 
Veck frowned over at his brother, "Lars...you're ruining this...".
 
As the full plan came out, in the last thing Harper would have thought to think up, she glanced over at Ridge who had apparently known all along that this was their captives' angle. While scowling at the two runners, Ridge noticed her look and shrugged, "I told you, crazy".
 
In silence everyone else took in this news. Veck and Lar's mother just stared at her sons. Her mate doing the same. Slowly, she was the first to turn towards the herd of seekers they had aided who now stood there with their reunited young ones and a deep frown creased her brow as she put together what the children being here and her sons' words meant. A stoic look came to her mate's face as well as he looked back. Both faced their sons.
 
"Veck..." the matriarch breathed, "you don't mean to tell me...".
 
"You kidnapped and tortured these young ones!" while the boys father didn't yell, his voice boomed about the rock walls.
 
Veck and Lars looked taken aback. It was the oldest, Veck, who spoke first. "I...kidnap? Torture?!" he sounded shocked at these words being put to them. "We were going to return them, soon even, and let them be present when we made our announcement we just made. They have been invaluable in showing us how their kinds do what they do".
 
With a start, Cera growled and made forward to probably attempt pinning the runners to the wall. Littlefoot stopped her though before going back to listening in shock along with the others to all of this as well. Ridge's father and Pterano were still, letting this sink in.
 
There were mumbles from within the runner's herd. The advisor, the one who had seen the two boys last before they took off, frowned and shook his head. "I told you two, I told you before you ran off, not to pay any mind to what that lone threehorn said. We have never had to prove ourselves!".
 
The patriarch of the herd held a hand out to pause him, still just staring at his son. Slowly he turned to face the herd of others they had traveled here with. "Companions. Children" he nodded to both, yet lumped Littlefoot, Cera, Spike Ducky and Petrie in with "companions". At "children" his gaze took in Ridge, Harper, Dinah and Dana specifically and held eye contact with them, "I apologize for my sons' actions".
 
"Apologize!". Astonished, Veck made to walk forward from the rock yet with the swiftest speed probably ever seen of any runner, his father turned to face him, "Stand! Back!". Both runners were still. The small valley grew quiet. Minutes seemed to stretch on and it seemed none breathed, especially not of the runners.
 
Yet still the children, adult spiketail, and Pterano could see the faces of the runners clearly. The patriarch closed his eyes. Beside him his mate gazed at her sons in sorrow. Finally the lead male opened his eyes to face his sons. "Veck. Lars. Runners in standing for leading this herd, and who should hold the values there in required. Have you any words to say in your favor now? To me? To those you've hurt?".
 
As slow reality of what was exactly going on came upon the two runners, Lars frowned in shock and worry and Veck's shocked look slowly turned to defiance. "You don't mean..." Lars started forward, but Veck held out a hand to stop his brother. Eyes never leaving his father's he gave his answer.
 
"I...defended this herd" he said evenly, "Defended it even as we were ridiculed for being 'just runners'. The kind that goes through these far walking herds forgotten. For us more colorful kinds, whispered about, but otherwise not given the position of the Bright Circle!".
 
The matriarch slowly shook her head as her mate's frown grew. "Veck...please..." she seemed to plead.
 
"I take back nothing!" Veck's voice now echoed about like his father's had. Silence fell once again.
 
The patriarch breathed in evenly then spoke, "You...deny wrong doing then?" he asked.
 
"Lars..." the boy's mother now glanced to her other son, trying to get some sense in through him. Although frowning in worry, Lars glanced to his brother.
 
"We...we were doing good. It was for the herd" his voice was less sure, not so defiant, but he stood his and his brother's ground.
 
"Very well..." The male herd leader's voice seemed nothing but a breath of pain, yet he stood straight once more and put more strength, any and all he had, into his voice as he went on, "Veck. Lars. Once heirs of the herd, by actions both immature, selfish and hurtful you have shown yourself unworthy of taking your status in our herd. Shown yourselves unworthy of the herd even".
 
From where they watched this talk, the children and Ridge's father were frozen. Not sure what to think or feel. This was especially true of Pterano as he struggled with all that was going through him. He knew first hand what it was like to stand and be convicted. The boys' grief stricken but silent mother, struggling through this but not speaking out for knowing what crimes did lay on her family, might very well have been Tory back during his own trial for immature, selfish and hurtful deeds.
 
Compassion and empathy wanted very much to well up from him towards these runners, but then...Pterano glanced down to Harper once again. Even to Petrie. These two runners carelessness had already caused so much and almost cost much more. Petrie had become tangled in the vines too, Pterano had seen it once he'd been close enough to realize what his nephew had charged after. Had their glider friend not turned the momentum of the fall into a tumble both Petrie and Harper would be...well it wasn't able to be fully thought on!
 
Yet, finally, Pterano understood the angry cries that had been sent out against him by the family members left behind of that herd he'd mislead. The cries for exile, even for death, during his trial finally resonated. He knew what extreme worry did to your compassion sense, and didn't know what to feel.
 
Standing within his own trial, Veck's eyes never left his father's as the verdict went on. "It is...there for, my duty, as leader of this herd to see justice served and..." the patriarch paused in his sentence.
 
"You've come this far, Father!" Veck shot out, bitterly spitting out the title, "Say it! Finish what you began!".
 
"Banish you from the herd" the patriarch went on, "...indefinitely". His silent mate finally broke a bit, turning her head into the comfort of his shoulder. He put an arm about her even as he gazed at his sons in unfathomable sorrow.
 
"Fine!" Veck shot out, "but this isn't over! I'll show you, I'll show you all!". Pterano flinched at the youth's cry, for it just as well may have been his own prideful promises after a similar fate had hit him that first time. Veck leapt down from the rock and darted off. Lars giving one more glance to his parents before darting off after. The patriarch slumped in, hugging his mate close as she cried, leaking tears down his own cheeks. But for this, all was silent.


Pterano

  • The Fabulous Fearsome Flyer
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Well it seems the parents took a stand, but their children aren't backing down either. I wonder what sort of dark revenge they'll be plotting now. XD  :unsure: I liked the contrast and comparison with Pterano, as it reminded him of his own experiences with being outcast. :)

Well, everyone's safe again, for now... but somehow I don't think this is the end of the story yet.

(runner up)
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Poster of the Gang of Five's 400,000th post


vonboy

  • Chomper: "Threehorns are better at everything, including rumpsteaks"
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Yeah, seems like the story could go on for quite a bit longer. Hmm, I wonder how involved Pterano is going to be in this story now? Is he going to try to talk some sense into those youngsters? You know, like keeping them from causing a tragedy like he did? That would be really interesting!

Anyway, great chapter! and I look forward to what happens next!
Come check out my new Youtube gaming channel, Game Biter!
---------------------
Littlefoot: "Look, Chomper. You're uncle is dead, and it's just right for your friends to be there for you. You'd be there if someone we know died, right?"

Chomper: "Well, sure I would!"

Come give my LBT TV Series fanfiction, PAST-O-RAMA, a read!
---------------------
(Runner-Up)


Mama's Girl

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Thanks guys :) Well I'll tell you this, we're nearing the end of THIS story, though I do have a sequel in the pondering stages since, yeah, can't leave Veck and Lars just running off and causing no trouble.


Petrie85

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Alright. I'm looking forward to this sequel to this awesome story. Can't wait for it.


vonboy

  • Chomper: "Threehorns are better at everything, including rumpsteaks"
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Oh okay. So this story's gonna end with the promise of an exciting sequel? I guess that works XD.

I would of liked to review this for the Fanfiction Awards, but I guess there's always next year for that ;)
Come check out my new Youtube gaming channel, Game Biter!
---------------------
Littlefoot: "Look, Chomper. You're uncle is dead, and it's just right for your friends to be there for you. You'd be there if someone we know died, right?"

Chomper: "Well, sure I would!"

Come give my LBT TV Series fanfiction, PAST-O-RAMA, a read!
---------------------
(Runner-Up)


Petrie85

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Yep. I know. I bet the sequel will be awesome.


Mama's Girl

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(Well someone pointed out ;) that yeah, since when do these kids get to just walk back to the Great Valley no extra problems...well it's probably happened sometimes, but not now :D Unfortunately. So warning of violence and death in this chapter. No named characters but still, yeah, this sharptooth's kinda hard core. Also, as said, well this is the last actual chapter, though I do have an epilogue afterwards)

XII: Proof of Concept
 
As the runners slowly walked back over towards the others, no one was sure at first what to say. Well mostly no one. "You are all welcome to come with us to the Great Valley, you are". It was sweet little Ducky's voice that said this, gazing right at the matriarch of the runner herd and, even for one so young, seeming, at least as far as she could, to understand the immense grief that now swept through the regal but vulnerable female.
 
She gave a smile, placing a hand on the swimmer's back, "Thankyou, dear one" her voice was soft with grief. She glanced to her mate. "We should at least escort you back" was his answer. Thus with it decided, they all headed out away from the small enclosed clearing and Harper wished to never see the spot again.
 
The gang and Guido traveled together in about the middle of the herd, of course, and the other kids right near them since Dinah and Dana seemed to want to stay so close to Cera that they almost tripped her up quite a few times. For once she didn't get onto them though, just sighed, shook her head and continued on. Petrie, also for once, didn't ride but rather flew near where Harper was. This left Ridge walking near the other kids as well, but any awkwardness was soon pushed aside and he and Littlefoot fell to talking.
 
"So, you're friends of Harpers?".
 
Littlefoot looked shy as to how to answer this, "Well...more her brother Petrie's friends and he came after her and we came after him" the longneck answered, "not that we wouldn't guard and protect any young one from the Great Valley, I mean...".
 
"No worries, I understand" Ridge laughed. They walked on for a bit and then Ridge went on, "I hear the rest of my herd's at the Great Valley?". Littlefoot nodded. "Well, knowing them they will probably want to stay" the spiketail went on, "is it really as great as it's made to sound?".
 
Littlefoot smiled, "Beyond that" he answered.
 
"No I believe Beyond would be where we are now" Ridge kidded. After such trials and worry, all the children were finding easy laughter.
 
"Well we think you should stay, Ridge" Harper threw out for what it was worth, "don't we kids" she smiled to Dinah and Dana, urging them on. The little kids smiled and nodded. "Yeah, you should stay!" Dinah said.
 
"Well I guess it's been decided" Ridge's father laughed, "I'll inform the herd leader of how he's been outvoted by children when we reach the Great Valley" he smiled.
 
"What about you and your own?" Pterano turned to the runners curiously. "I can attest that the Great Valley is as great a paradise if not better then words make it sound, do you feel you'll be called to stay as well?".

The matriarch smiled as she caught what Pterano was asking, he was finding out whether or not the only herd of ground walkers he'd found in a while to accept him would be abandoning him or not. She wasn't sure why, if the two young ones were his own sister's hatchlings as said, and if his sister did live in the Great Valley, he didn't as well, but it wasn't really a matter she felt she should pry into. Instead she just answered the question put to her.

"I...am not sure of our own plans" she said, "as you've no doubt picked up on, we are a bit of a mystery to most and thus looked at critically a bit".

Pterano nodded, not sure if this was a yes or no, but moving on. He wasn't actively scanning as he should be as the unofficial scout of the herd, but being the only adult flyer he was flying higher up and thus spotted movement up ahead of them. Through a pass they were about to go through, something darted from the right over to the left. It was just a blur but...something felt off and Pterano felt a warning sense flare up. "E-Everyone hold!" he used a normal level of voice and whispered for some reason as yet unknown to himself even.

"Oh, well..." Harper was in the middle of what was probably a defense of those in the Valley to the matriarch, when she was cut off by her uncle's words and the small herd pausing.

"What is it?" Ridge's father asked. Pterano frowned, about to say what he was thinking, how he didn't know, when the answer slowly stepped out.

For most sharpteeth, stealth and speed was their vital weapon; few would casually reveal themselves to a herd. But this small but effective hunter knew where his skills lay and knew the intimidation factor those smart enough to know of him and his kind felt. He smirked in pride and satisfaction as he stepped out and watched the frowns of uncertainty and some fear come over the flatteeth's faces.

The word that held all his power was soon enough whispered out, by Ridge's father, "Spitter..." he backed a step or two up.

"Get around the children, now!" the matriarch whispered to her mate, who was already moving with knowing what he must do and why. He motioned to his herd and they followed him in forming a ring about the nine children and Guido. Pterano flew down closer, mind working through what to do. He'd heard the word and it was one he'd hoped with all his soul had been just an untrue myth of the Mysterious Beyond. Apparently not. Apparently these devils existed.

"W-What's a Spitter?" Harper asked, glancing up to her uncle who had always known everything about everything before. His look was grim and he closed his eyes though, "Sharptooth...with...with a horrible defense that...".

"Look out!" Ridge's father called in warning to the advisor of the runners on the right of the blockade. A hiss came  from the sharptooth as a small frill, looking no more than a slight coloration about the neck, flared and...Harper (along with most of the other children) gasped as she caught sight of something her mind couldn't fully process at first. A black liquid came from the sharptooth's mouth and flew across the air before hitting the advisor, the pain causing him to falter outside the protective circle of his fellows. Most, if not all of the kids closed their eyes and glanced aside, but even if they avoided the sight, the cry of the attack to a paralyzed victim sent a chill down each of their spines.

Satisfied he had one victim, the spitter wheeled about to face the herd once more. Suddenly, as he seemed to gear up for another spit to take down more, a blur of blue and green leapt and spun from the side, the matriarch runner delivering a kick straight to the sharptooth's side that sent him skidding down off his feet and across the dirt. Despite the dangerous situation, the kids were impressed. The spitter stopped, on his side, and Ridge's father, seeing an opening, rushed, tail up and aimed his spikes down to finish the sharptooth. He hit only dirt as the spitter rolled out of the way and to his feet though, hissing angrily in a vocalization only before crouching, red and green coloration that denoted a deadly spit appearing again about the neck as he hissed.

"Dad!" Ridge cried in shock and worry as his father prepared to parry. Just as the spitter let lose his acid, though, he found himself reeling again and the shot flew harmlessly past the spiketail by mere inches. As the sharptooth fell over to his side, Ridge's father glanced over and noticed Pterano flapping there after having knocked the spitter down.

The flyer immediately turned his address to the matriarch, "Madam I feel getting out of this pass may be imperative so...".

"Already on it" she didn't even have to hear all he would have said. "Forward" she directed both her runners, the children and adult spiketail.

"Come on" Littlefoot and Ridge both turned and said, giving their typical encouragement needed to get the others moving even before they could consider freezing. Ridge seemed hesitant himself though, along with Petrie as both kept an eye in back of them on their relatives as Ridge's father and Pterano stayed.

"They'll be good, they'll be good, go!" Harper said, despite her own worry, and again in that quiet form of good judgment she wasn't even aware she had that had first paused Ridge from recklessness back in their captivity and now keep him and Petrie moving off from a situation they couldn't help in and would only endanger themselves if they tried.

The spitter stood and shook himself, growling lowly as he noticed majority of his intended other victims escaping. Pterano flapped there covering the exit and then noticed the spiketail wasn't leaving.

"She meant you too!" he called.

"No way, I'm not leaving you to face a spitter alone!" Ridge's father said.

"I can fly away and you ground walkers can't, so you're the one's who must go" the words left Pterano's beak before he could take stock of them.

It is not my fault they couldn't fly away is it?!

Pterano hadn't even realized how...far separated that old excuse and this statement on ground walkers and flyers he gave now were, until then. Neither that or how his actions, now, in this pass, were such a far cry from...then as well.

"Well then put those wings to use!" Pterano snapped back to the moment at hand as the spiketail delivered a hit of his tail to the spitter as the sharptooth had tried to gear up for a shot at the distracted flyer.

Pterano gave an abashed smile of thanks to the spiketail after his own lapse in attention.

"Come on!" the patriarch runner, now through the pass with the others, called, "hurry, we can cut off the pass with a rock all set to roll". Both Pterano and the spiketail beat wings and feet to out speed their pursuer and thankfully the spitter wasn't up on flattooth language enough to get the warning ahead of time, so his charge was a few seconds delayed. All the seconds the runners needed to push the rock over and block the sharptooth's pursuit.

They heard the spitter give a few more screeches, but it soon became clear that he was cut off, and he soon ceased his noise, probably moving on to the one victim he had managed to secure, the grim thought hit some. They all still moved off a distance or so before taking breaths. Both Ridge and Petrie rushed over to all but hug the life out of their relatives as they were safe. Harper was relieved Pterano was alright too, of course, but let her smile say this. That and it held a look of pride in him that Pterano had never seen before. Petrie was starting to get that smile too. It was the look you got...when you deserved it.

Both Pterano and the spiketail glanced to each other. Now with their eyes opened a bit, they felt an apology to each other for their slight disagreement a day or so ago was in order, but actions speaking louder than words and all, they'd sort of just taken care of that.

"Ok..." Guido sighing and seeming to pass out on the floor broke the tension, "I can live without ever seeing one of those again!". There were quiet chuckles of agreement as Harper and Petrie helped the glider back up.

(Alright I know you probably all know this by now, but in case you're curious, yes I was using a Dilophosaurus of Jurassic Park fame and skills for the Spitter sharptooth. I didn't find any material on them being fan integrated before so I just came up with what they would probably be called. :DD)


Petrie85

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This was a very great chapter you made here. It was well worth the read. It was great.


Mama's Girl

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(Alright, I should go on and give you people the epilogue so that I can get on to the sequel aye? :DD)

Epilogue

As the Great Valley finally came into view, Littlefoot and most of the others rushed off to inform their parents of their safe return, with the taken children even.

"It seems" the matriarch said softly to Ridge and his father, "my mate and I will be needed to give your herd and the two threehorn's and young flyer's families the tale of their trials".

"You don't have to" the spiketail said, "we'll tell them".

"No" the matriarch gave a soft smile, "my sons are implicated, you'll forgive me, I know you would not insult them but...".

Ridge's father nodded, understanding, "Better you speak ill of them, as gently as you can, than someone else". Both the runners nodded.

"Of course" the spiketail lead them off towards his herd.

Harper and Petrie were of course eager to let their mom know they were alright as well, but first both hatchlings had a mission of their own as they pulled and tugged, trying to convince Pterano to step through into the Great Valley as well.

"Nothing doing!" the flyer finally pulled lose of their grips, "Why if my breath so much as hit any part of that Valley as of this moment, Old Mr. Threehorn would be here in two seconds flat to kick my tail from here to our old nesting ground!". Despite their losing out, Petrie and Harper giggled at this.

Pterano knelt down nearer them, "I've put you two, the others and your mother through enough" he went on more seriously, "I'll serve my term full and fair so that there may be nothing baring me once I am allowed back". Harper let out a sigh but smiled and nodded. Petrie frowned and darted over to give Pterano another hug.

His uncle wrapped his wings about him and stayed like that for a bit before setting his nephew back. "Now, let's not go through this again" Pterano smiled sadly, "the Cold Times are fewer than last time I was assuring you I'd be fine" he pointed out.

"Not few enough" Petrie hugged him again. Finally though, the young one let his uncle place him back down on the ground just outside the entrance.

"Don't go getting any ideas you" a voice spoke and all three flyers turned to notice Topsy having come over as guard of the gate for the Great Valley apparently.

"Ah" Pterano grimaced, "for someone who isn't fond of my presence, you sure put a great deal of attention into realizing when I'm about".

"Some dinosaurs get aches before sky water, my stomach turns whenever you just happen to be near" was Topsy's answer, level glare aimed at the flyer who just rolled his eyes.

It was Harper, this time, who spoke up for Pterano, "But Mr. Threehorn, he saved Cera and the twins. From a Spitter even".

Topsy grumbled, "These so called Spitter sharpteeth do not exist and...".

Three flyers adamantly shook their heads no, that such creatures did in fact exist!

"Ask the runners, they can tell you too!" Harper went on.

Topsy looked stunned and then turned to Pterano again, "Of course, it would be tied in with you, those freaks entering the Valley!".

Harper of course had known by now what the second of the Great Valley Council was like, but she looked shocked at this and then frowned, "They're not...!" she'd started forward to defend the runners, the matriarch already having earned her respect by her own actions whatever her sons had done.

"Now Harper" Pterano gently paused the hatchling, "We mustn’t be too hard on Mr. Threehorn, after all he can't help what he is".

"Wh--why you!" Topsy seemed not able to settle on what he wanted to do to the flyer. He started forward, but Pterano paused him.

"Please, don't strain yourself thinking up something to do to me, I shan't be staying that long". He glanced back down to do justice and give Harper a farewell too, especially after the child had incurred Mr. Threehorn's frustration to defend him as she had.

"Not that I don't appreciate you being kind enough to stick up for your old uncle like that, Harper" he told her, laying a hand on her shoulder, "but try not to let Old Threehorn here bait you into too many petty arguments on my account that would sully that good nature".

Whether nor not Harper got all of what he said, she got enough of it and smiled and nodded, "Ok".

"See you two soon" Pterano gave his final promise before flapping up right as Tospy looked like he could stand his presence no longer. Satisfied with his job well done in keeping the flyer from a premature entrance at least, the threehorn grumbled to himself as he walked off.

Petrie and Harper watched him go then glanced to each other and laughed as they walked inside the Great Valley. "So...um" Petrie began, "This not mean you gonna be hanging around with Ridge hanging around me and friends, does it?". He'd already noticed the spiketail's own making friends with the rest of them.

Harper's smile grew and she shrugged, "I don't know, maybe, why? Are you saying you'd take off across half the Mysterious Beyond to find me but you don't want me hanging around you and your friends?" she asked.

"Uh huh" Petrie nodded. He said it so normally too that Harper paused and just stared at him. Then, she cracked a smile.

"Aw, well Petrie, it's not like I would be embarrassing and hug you to death" she said innocently, then, before her brother could defend himself, she launched at him to do just that, hug him tightly, knocking him to the ground.

She giggled trying to keep him down as Petrie struggled to get loose, "Ah, see, this why me need a break!" he cried.

Petrie's release came in the form of Harper suddenly recalling the rest of her family after a while. "Oh hey!" she sat back, "Mom still doesn't know we're both back! Come on, let's go tell her how you found me" she said.

"Ok" Petrie sat up, catching his breath from the strain of trying to get away from the hug attack, "but first me gotta tell you something".

"Yeah?" Harper asked.

"You it!" Petrie exclaimed, tapping her and then darting off. As he'd probably been counting on, Harper stood there stunned for a moment at Petrie starting up a tag game after telling her to keep her distance from him and his friends.

"H-Hey, no fair!" she darted after.


Pterano

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OK, now that I'm finally caught up with the fanfiction awards, I can finally devote time to finishing this. :DD

Well, now I know how Ridge came to live in the Great Valley. :yes There was also a nice bit of redemption for Pterano there, during his battle with the spitter and supporting Ridge's father, especially when he told him to leave, as he couldn't fly away. XD

So yeah, this was a nice short story, and I think you did well in bringing it to its conclusion, though I'm willing to bet that Veck and Lars aren't done yet. :p Well I'm glad I'm all caught up, and I liked how this worked out. :)

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Poster of the Gang of Five's 400,000th post


The Friendly Sharptooth

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For numerous reasons, I will no longer be voluntarily reviewing chapters of fan fictions here. I believe that it’s not a good idea as far as I’m concerned. So unless someone specifically asks me to review his or her chapters, in which case I'll do my best to oblige, here is what I am going to do: I will be waiting until fan fictions are over and then review them as a whole. So here is my first one after reaching my decision:

The fan fiction called One of a Kind interestingly enough focuses on a sister of a main character. The author gave detail to a character so rarely seen. The story is about an argument between Harper and Petrie that indirectly results in her being kidnapped. Petrie blames himself and goes off looking for her, his friends following. She was taken, along with other children, both new and old, for research purposes. They go through a rough time until the captor’s herd, the gang of five, and Petrie’s uncle manage to find her and save all the kids. After a saddening split and a dangerous battle, they arrive back at the Great Valley where things aren’t what they used to be, but rather, are better for numerous characters.

The author creates a clever character foil between the antagonist (Harper) and her brother (Petrie). She pays attention to details and is more logical and responsible while Petrie ignores things (like in Through the Eyes of a Spiketail when he says, “Gutsy, gusty, what the difference?” in an indifferent tone) and tends to be very illogical (shown by his many fears that cause no harm throughout the series) and is very brash (the way he flies off in this story without a plan). Like with all foils, Petrie’s contrasting attributes help to highlight the main character. The irony of this foil is that Petrie goes on adventures and has poor travelling qualities, while Harper, who stays at home and plays, has the qualities of a great adventurer. This really helps to make this protagonist interesting.

The premise was very creative. The official The Land Before Time storyline established many reasons for villains to be present, such as wanting food, wanting revenge, wanting power, and so forth, but this story uniquely presents the plot of villains doing what they do for knowledge. They bring with them a lighthearted worry to the reader, as they are mean but not murderous, threatening but barely a threat, and serious but mild compared to most villains. The two runners were adults physically but youth mentally, making their crimes more of a mistake than an actually sin. They believed their actions to be right, even with the kidnapping, so Pterano, who later comes into the story, has more than one reason to see himself in these two.

The dramatic irony brought a fair amount of humor even though the misconception was never spelled out later. Pterano is treated well by his gracious host then vows to get revenge on her children without knowing it. The readers have knowledge beyond the characters, so the words in that scene have a different meaning than they do for the speakers. An old example of a time this was used was when Jacob in the book of Genesis told his uncle that if anyone stole his idle, he will die. Only the readers, outside of the culprit herself, knew it was his own wife! So there is a buildup established that makes the story gripping until the confrontation takes place.

The conflict of the story was very light for most of the story, and this made the read more relaxing. The two antagonists were going to return everyone, so other than any minor injuries the kids might’ve gotten, readers had no reason to fear. However, this suddenly got very dark when a legendary sharptooth attacked the group. Some readers may think this was a random fight scene added to make things more interesting and give some more action. That is not the case. The author clever used the battle to show a character’s transformation, Pterano. He recalled what he did last time he was in a situation like this- then did the exact opposite. It was great to see the author working on so many characters.

The story had great foreshadowing for a sequel to take place. Two children are removed from their family, banished (ironically, just like Pterano was who behaved just like them) and basically vowed that this wasn’t the end. As the future is hinted at, readers reach the heartwarming conclusion of the two most focused on characters whose argument started this, at least, their role in it. They are on even better terms than when the story began, and things end with a smile from readers as one mischievous starts a game with the other. Though never spelled out, one might imply from all that happened that Harper is not so jealous of Petrie’s adventures, having now seen how scary and dangerous they are instead of the fun and laughter she apparently thought them to be. Perhaps now she is glad she stays at home and plays.

The story was very gripping, from a fascinating plot, to likable and believable characters, to feeling so much emotion throughout. There were logical actions from characters and some illogical, so this really brought out the realism of thinking. It flowed very naturally, not leaving readers suddenly lost as to why the story got to a certain point. Even Pterano’s sudden appearance was smoothed into the story so naturally that this entire fan fiction can be seen as a straight line, not some mountainous area, and this allows the story to be understood very well and keeps why are things are happening clear. More tension builds up slowly so readers aren’t suddenly sent for a loop, and the climax was beautifully done, even though it was very heart wrenching. From beginning to end, the picture of what was going on was consistent.

However, there was some room for improvement. There were a lot of grammar errors, such as leaving out or adding a letter, making a run-on sentence, leaving out a comma, double punctuating, etcetera. Two words used that should not be in a dinosaur story were “people” and “heavens,” but this was very minor so served as almost no distraction. The grammar issues, on the other hand, were very common, so depending on the reader, this could really take the focus off the story and onto the mistakes. There was a contradiction near the very start. The narrator says that Harper did not throw Petrie, just gently set him down, but Petrie felt as though he was thrown. So it was established that he was set down, not thrown, further supported by the narrator saying that Petrie took it otherwise than how it actually happened. Then shortly afterwards, the narrator says Harper literally threw him. Another issue was that it was never specified what the title meant. Was it about Harper? The pair of runner siblings? The premise of the story? It was a nice-sounding title, but it leaves readers wondering why it was created in the first place.

Another thing that could have been improved was the contrast between Harper’s situation and all the others. What was going on with Harper was much more interesting than the other character scenes, so while not seeing what’s going on with Harper, Ridge, the runners, and so on, readers are more looking forward to getting back to her scene. The other characters mostly just walked and talked while Harper’s scene had intriguing villains who put the kids through trials. In other words, the appeal of her scene and all the others were unbalanced, leaving a sort of looking ahead to what was going on with her instead of simply enjoying every moment as it came.

In the end, readers are left with a very well-written story that while seemingly a bit rushed at some points, leaves them in awe and with emotions at how splendidly the author portrayed her creative and interesting plot. Readers can really feel for the characters, but not only that, relate to them. A lot of real life can be observed in this fiction. The author found a way to make every scene interesting enough to keep going and keep a sort of trance as readers wonder what’s to come of the victims, the captors, and the seekers. The antagonists were brilliantly created with similar but contrasting personalities that made their actions and dialogue unique and amusing. The story wasn’t very long, but it still managed to do a real number to the readers minds and hearts as it flowed from start to finish. To shed some fascinating light on a mostly-ignored character and be captivated by many instances of love, fear, courage, and more, one can read the heartwarming tale known as One of a Kind.