Funniest Quotes You've Heard

MrDrake · **Reply #180 on:** January 24, 2010, 06:46:20 PM

Was watching Enchanted last night, and I loved this quote:

Old Lady: *about Prince Edward* He was on the bus this morning, he tried to kill me
- Enchanted

Cancerian Tiger · **Reply #181 on:** January 25, 2010, 08:49:47 PM

"Saw"

Dr. Lawrence Gordon: "What's your name?"

Adam: "My name is Very *Censored* Confused! What's your name?"

MrDrake · **Reply #182 on:** January 25, 2010, 10:12:54 PM

Lewis: *returns holding a stick* I found a stick!
- The Princess and the Frog

Nick22 · **Reply #183 on:** January 25, 2010, 11:49:35 PM

hey doll, want to earn 14 bucks.. the hard way?
Caddyshack

MrDrake · **Reply #184 on:** January 26, 2010, 02:15:53 AM

Zim: As soon as we destoy Tak, I'm gonna feed your brains to my robots
Dib: Deal
Gir: Yay! Brains!
- Invader Zim

Ptyra · **Reply #185 on:** January 26, 2010, 07:00:13 PM

^ Speaking of Invader Zim
GIR: It's ME! I was the turkey all along!
Zim: I was wondering what that turkey was doing there. GIR, (don't remember)
GIR: I WAS THE TURKEY! ME!
Zim:...Yes, so you were.

Dib's dad: Not now, son, I am making...TOAST!

MrDrake · **Reply #186 on:** January 27, 2010, 02:35:48 AM

Hehe yeah, Invader Zim is awesome ^^

Zim: It seems like we've been found out, Gir, time to self destruct
Gir: Finally! *self destructs*

Gaz: Are there any video games around here?
Computer: No, not really
Gaz: *kicks it, annoyed* Fine, I guess I'll help save the Earth then

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #187 on:** February 02, 2010, 04:43:52 PM

Mass Effect 2

*The Normandy is being boarded by the Collectors and Joker has to get to the engine room so EDI can get the ship out of there*

Joker: You mean I have to crawl through ducts again?

EDI: I enjoy the sight of humans on their knees.

Joker: ...

EDI: That was a joke.

Joker: Right...

MrDrake · **Reply #188 on:** February 03, 2010, 04:12:39 PM

Tak: The first part of my plan involves destroying your base
Zim: *as his base is being destroyed* No! My beautiful base!
Tak: The second part of my plan is...
Zim: No! My beautiful base!
Tak: Part two of my plan is....
Zim: No! My beautiful base!
Tak: Part two is...
Zim: No! My beautiful base!
Tak: Part two...
Zim: No!
Tak: *annoyed* Okay, I'm done here
Zim: But you didn't tell me the second part of your plan
*Tak just glares at Zim for a long hard second before she leaves*
- Invader Zim

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #189 on:** February 03, 2010, 08:44:11 PM

Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs

Buck's Best Line

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XYDyRVdmCuo

MrDrake · **Reply #190 on:** February 04, 2010, 12:46:55 AM

Homer: We've got to hit him where he lives
Bart: His house?
Homer: Bingo
- The Simpsons

Ptyra · **Reply #191 on:** February 04, 2010, 06:57:18 PM

Quote from: MrDrake,Feb 3 2010 on 02:12 PM

Tak: The first part of my plan involves destroying your base
Zim: *as his base is being destroyed* No! My beautiful base!
Tak: The second part of my plan is...
Zim: No! My beautiful base!
Tak: Part two of my plan is....
Zim: No! My beautiful base!
Tak: Part two is...
Zim: No! My beautiful base!
Tak: Part two...
Zim: No!
Tak: *annoyed* Okay, I'm done here
Zim: But you didn't tell me the second part of your plan
*Tak just glares at Zim for a long hard second before she leaves*
- Invader Zim

And let's not forget when he thinks she's after his bee! And then the bee flies away! "NOOOO!!!"

GIR: GIR, reporting for duty
Zim: GIR? What does the "G" stand for?
GIR:...I don't know.
(silence)
GIR: *starts hitting his head* WEEEHOOHOOHOO!
Zim: Um...is it supposed to be stupid?
Tallest Purple: Oh it's not stupid. It's advaaanced.

MrDrake · **Reply #192 on:** February 05, 2010, 07:26:28 AM

lol, indeed XD

Zim: You're after my buzzy bee aren't you!?

Gir: *after recieving pizza* *to the pizza man* I love you

Zim: Gir! Bring me another pig!
Gir: *in tears* Okay *hands over the pig* *in tears* I miss you piggy

Dib: My head's not big!

Cancerian Tiger · **Reply #193 on:** February 05, 2010, 12:41:48 PM

Here's a hilarious one from Disney's "The Hunchback of Notre Dame":

Laverne (to Quasimoto): "Don't worry, Quasi. We always thought you were the cute one."

Hugo (while eating): "I thought I was the cute one."

Laverne: "No! You're the fat, stupid one with a big mouth!"

MrDrake · **Reply #194 on:** February 05, 2010, 08:08:25 PM

Napolean: I can handle this okay?
Ivan: You can handle nothing! You can barly speak you fool!
- Night at the Museum 2

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #195 on:** February 06, 2010, 11:05:58 AM

Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs

-Another funny Buck Line-

Buck: The wind... it's speaking to me...

Eddie (or Crash, forgot who): Really? What's it saying?

Buck: Don't know. I don't speak Wind.

MrDrake · **Reply #196 on:** February 06, 2010, 10:18:00 PM

Hans Gruber: *reading sweatshirt* I now have a machine gun...ho ho ho
- Die Hard

Just the way he says it in his accent is awesome XD

MrDrake · **Reply #197 on:** February 07, 2010, 07:08:51 AM

Matt Farrell: You just killed a helicopter with a car!
John McClane: I was out of bullets

Lucy: *about Matt* So, did he say anything about me?
John McClane: Jesus Lucky, I'm already in enough pain....

Matt Farrell: Awww, great! There goes the cell phone.
John McClane: They knocked the satellites out of the skies, now?
Matt Farrell: No, your battery ran out

Thomas Gabriel: On your tombstone it should read, "Always in the wrong place at the wrong time".
John McClane: How about, "Yippi-kay-ay, motherfu - " *gunshot*

Matt Farrell: Do we have anything, like, resembling a plan, or anything?
John McClane: Find Lucy, kill everybody else.
Matt Farrell: I mean, more like a plan, like, a way to do that

John McClane: You know what you get for being a hero? Nothin'. You get shot at. You get a little pat on the back, blah, blah, blah, attaboy. You get divorced. Your wife can't remember your last name. Your kids don't want to talk to you. You get to eat a lot of meals by yourself. Trust me, kid, nobody wants to be that guy
- Live Free or Die Hard

Ptyra · **Reply #198 on:** February 07, 2010, 02:38:48 PM

Quote from: MrDrake,Feb 5 2010 on 05:26 AM

lol, indeed XD

Zim: You're after my buzzy bee aren't you!?

Gir: *after recieving pizza* *to the pizza man* I love you

Zim: Gir! Bring me another pig!
Gir: *in tears* Okay *hands over the pig* *in tears* I miss you piggy

Dib: My head's not big!

Now that we mention the piggy

GIR: (crying) WHY PIGGY!? WHY!? I LOVED-ED YOU!

From Logan's Run (I just watched it)
Logan: CARROUSEL IS A LIE!!!
It's not supposed to be a funny line, but I find it quite quotable.

Here comes referencing it in an LBT fanart

MrDrake · **Reply #199 on:** February 07, 2010, 03:28:49 PM

Patches: If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball
Justin: What? *Patches throws a wrench at Justin*

Patches: If you can dodge traffic, you can dodge a ball
- Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story