Funniest Quotes You've Heard

2007excalibur2007 · **Reply #240 on:** March 22, 2010, 02:49:54 AM

Call Of Duty 4 (again):

SAS #1: We're going deep, and we're going hard.
SAS #2: Surely you can't be serious.
SAS #1: I'm serious... and don't call me "shirley".

XD

MrDrake · **Reply #241 on:** March 22, 2010, 02:57:19 AM

God of War III

Hephasteus: I thought you would've died by now
Kratos: I thought you would've escaped by now

Not 100% sure on what Hephesteus says, but it's something along those lines anyway, I just love Kratos' comeback regardless

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #242 on:** March 23, 2010, 11:14:17 AM

Bad Company 2

Redford: Hags, come on now. If you leave, no more t-bone steaks man.

Preston: Yeah, no more buying AR-15 ammo at the mall.

Sweetwater: No more shooting trespasser off your front yard.

Redford: No more biscuits and gravy.

Sweetwater: No more Super Bowl Sundays... no more Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders...

Haggard: ...Oh man that tears it. Get outta the way! I gotta save me some cheerleaders!

Ptyra · **Reply #243 on:** March 27, 2010, 12:50:19 AM

(In JitteryDragon's LBT Youtube poops)
Cera: What are you doing here?
Pterano: Migrating, naturally, like the others out there in the field. Boldly searching an unforgiving wasteland to find a more hospitable wasteland to call home!
Cera: Well you'll find it here.
*shot from the ruins of the Valley in V)

I tell you, I crack up thinking about it.

Pterano: don't you recognize your dear old uncle?
Petrie:...MAMA LUGIGI!!!
Pterano: ...
Robotnic: NO!!!

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #244 on:** March 27, 2010, 02:25:42 AM

Bad Company 2

Haggard: Here we are in South America. All special operation stuff... still blowin' up barrels.

Sweetwater: So what would you rather be doing?

Haggard: Just saying, rescuing hostages... doin' slow motion weapons kills on terrorists... telling people to "get off my plane"...

Sweetwater: ...You wanna be Harrison Ford in "Air Force One"?

Haggard: Would you?

Sweetwater: No, you gotta be Indiana Jones man!

Haggard: I like Harrison Ford better.

Sweetwater: But that WAS Harrison Ford.

Haggard: Oh, uh... yeah.

MrDrake · **Reply #245 on:** March 27, 2010, 05:57:27 PM

Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Sir Belvedere: What do you burn apart from witches?
Peasent: More witches!

Sir Belvedere: And how do we know that she is made out of wood?
Peasent: Build a bridge out of her!

Peasent: She turned me into a newt!
Sir Belvedere: A newt?
Peasent: *slight pause* I got better....

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #246 on:** March 28, 2010, 02:35:49 PM

The 100 Cheesiest Movie Quotes of All Time

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTiAS7cdsYc&feature=channel

MrDrake · **Reply #247 on:** March 28, 2010, 07:44:47 PM

Mercanries 2: World in Flamces

Ewen: *to you, the Player* Hi boss, just hanging out, waiting for your calls....please don't shoot me

jedi472 · **Reply #248 on:** March 28, 2010, 09:28:12 PM

From Star Trek:First Contact

Zefram Cochrane (moves to leave): Hang on, I gotta take a leak...

Geordi LaForge (looks arounds, confused): Leak? I'm not detecting any leak...

Cochrane (turns around, stupefied): Don't you people from the 24th century ever pee?

MrDrake · **Reply #249 on:** March 28, 2010, 11:09:57 PM

SpongeBob SquarePants

Patrick: *thinking someone's punched SpongeBob in the eye* We'll settle this like men! We'll sue him!

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #250 on:** March 30, 2010, 10:46:28 AM

Mass Effect 2
*More fun with Joker and EDI*

Shepard: I assume everything is going well up here?

Joker: Shhissaashissashh...

Shepard: Joker?

Joker: I can tell when it's listening...

EDI: I'm ALWAYS listening Mr. Moreau

Joker: I know...!

Ptyra · **Reply #251 on:** April 03, 2010, 11:53:22 PM

From Michael York's Autobiography: Accidentally on Purpose.

This is describing the first time he met his wife, Pat McCallum (who, for the Star Wars fans, is the mother of Rick MaCullum. Yeep. Michael York's his step-daddy!). Pat was interviewing him for the Glammor magazine.

Quote

We drank tea and chatted. As Lear would have liked, her voice was soft and low. Assuaging my Henry Higgens-like curiosity over her unusual vowels, she explained that she was an American born in Jamaica, brought up in Germany, and schooled in England at a French Convent

That certainly would result in a very unusual accident. I feel so sorry for the poor woman later on, though. She spends a heck of a lot of time in hospitals for some reason or another (the incidents before The Guru (between their engagement and before their wedding) and The Last Remake of Beau Geste are huge biggies)

2007excalibur2007 · **Reply #252 on:** April 08, 2010, 11:44:52 AM

From a "300" YouTube Poop made by Mark3611:

Persian: NINE thousand nations of the Persian empire, descend upon you! Our arrows will blot out the sun!
Stelios: Then we will fight in the shade.
Persian: Our arrows will blot out the shade!
Stelios: Then we will fight in the s***.

King Leonidas: Take from them nothing! But give them SPARTAAAAA!!!!

King Leonidas: By Spartan law, we will STAND, and FIGHT, and EAT SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-GHETTI!!!

Oh gawd, that's the most priceless YTP ever.

Daddytops2009 · **Reply #253 on:** April 08, 2010, 05:28:26 PM

Secret of NIMH 2:

Young master Brisby

Ptyra · **Reply #254 on:** April 08, 2010, 05:31:42 PM

From "Rocks Fall and Everybody Dies" YTP
Petrie: How come you not play?
Littlefoot: Aww, I'm still thinking about s3x.
Petrie: D8 ! Um...Petrie not want to think about it 8| . Spoooky
Pterano: NONSENSE!

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #255 on:** April 13, 2010, 08:18:24 PM

Mass Effect 2

*Garrus and Tali back on the Citadel*

Garrus: Do you ever miss those talks we had on those elevators?

Tali: No.

Garrus: Come on... remember how we'd all ask you about your life on the Flotilla? It was a great opportunity to share.

Tali: This conversation is over.

Garrus: Tell me again about your immune system.

Tali: I have a shotgun...

Garrus: Maybe we'll talk later...

Cancerian Tiger · **Reply #256 on:** April 13, 2010, 08:35:21 PM

I did not care too much for the film "Antz", but there's this scene that I still remember finding hilarious.

*Scene with flies eating...well...what they normally eat

*

Fly 1: "Hey! Tastes like crap!"

Fly 2: "Lemme see!"

*Fly 2 tries crap*

Fly 2: "It IS crap!"

MrDrake · **Reply #257 on:** April 13, 2010, 08:43:10 PM

Alive in Wonderland (2010 film)

March Hare: You are late for tea! *throws cup at Naive*

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #258 on:** April 14, 2010, 11:28:31 AM

The Simpsons

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBoL_UgK-N8

Ptyra · **Reply #259 on:** April 14, 2010, 05:45:27 PM

From "Tarzan"
Clayton: Where are the gorillas?
*Tarzan pulls Clayton's mustache*
Clayton: GO-RIL-AS!
Tarzan: GO-RIL-AS!
Jane: Shouting won't help, Mr. Clayton, he doesn't understand.
Clayton: (Forgot) If I can teach a parrot to sing "God Save the Queen", I can teach this savage to tell us how to find the gorillas (?) *draws a cartoon gorilla on the blackboard* Gorilla!
Tarzan: (Holding the chalk) Gorilla!
Porter: He's got it!
Tarzan: Gorillia *climbs onto the chalkboard and scibbles on it* Go-rrrilllla!
Porter: Oh...maybe he hasn't
Clayton: *takes away the chalk* No! No! No!
Tarzan: NO! NO! NO! NO!
They start fighting over the chalk
Jane: *takes away the chalk* Maybe I should handle this.

Their fight later was so much more manly