The Gang of Five
Howdy, everyone!

The member joining awards for 2019, 2020, and 2021 have been posted. We admins would like to thank each and every one of you who have made the forum their home over these years. It is because of people like you that the forum is the welcoming place that it is. :)

The forum supporter awards for those who maintained the forum on Patreon in 2023 will also be up shortly. Again, thank you all for what you do to keep our little corner of the Internet online!

The Land Before time: the improved version!

Guest · 11 · 3187

Kron the Iguanadon

  • Guest
Hi, guys! As you probably know I'm pretty new here and am really exited about all of this---I finally get to share my opinions on LBT and talk about it on this site!

So here's my topic. I looooooove the first film, but I think it could have been even better!! So here's my script of how I would improve it. (I know a lot of scenes were filmed for the film that ended up being taken out because they were too scary. Such a shame.)


Here it goes!






Darkness...

1. Ext. Underwater

....strange creautures swim about in this blue underworld...

...we hold still on this intriguing sight...

...and begin to pan to the right. We see more of these strange creatures...one nearly is eaten by what appears to be a crocodile.

...now moving through plants...

...which are crushed by an enormous foot. Fade to turtles swiiming through the now shallow water...as the title appears:

"The Land Before Time"

2. Ext/Int. Shallow Cove

We watch as more creatures splash through the water, and hear:

NARRATOR
Once, upon this same earth...beneath this same sun...long before you, before the ape and the elephant as well,  before the wolf, the python, the whale, before the mammoth, and the mastadon...long, long ago...

Smash to:

3. Ext. Misty Forest - Day

An enormous apatasaurus raises her neck into a profile shot, and looks out into the distance. Two others follow her...

NARRATOR
In the time of the dinosaurs!

4. Ext. Desert - Late Day

A Heard of Triceratops wander through the vast wasteland.

NARRATOR
These great giants were of two kinds...some had flat teethand they ate the leaves of the trees.

One of the triceratopses looks back at his staggering fellows.

MALE TRICERATOPS
C'MON!

FADE TO

5. Ext. Desert - Late Day

A herd of saropods catiously makes their way through the desrt.

NARRATOE
 Some had sharp teeth, and they preyed upon the leaf eaters. and some had sharp teeth.

Then the leaves began to die. The mighty beasts, who appeared to rule the earth…

6. Ext. Misty Swamp – Night

Pteradactlys soar through the mysterious deep blue sky, while in the distance the same apatasaur herd of three we saw earlier continues their march through the strange, wet land.

NARRATOR  
…were ruled, in truth, by the leaf. Desperate for food, some dinosaur herds struck out towards the west…

Cut to a closeup of the youngest of the apatssaurs, the female, making her way through the swamp.

NARRATOR
…searching in hope of lands still lush and green. It was a journey towards life.

7. Ext. Swamp – Early Morning

A male saropod drinks from a pond, while his mate lies in the BG guarding a nest of eggs. Close in on the female, nuzzling her eggs lovingly.

NAARATOR
It was a mrach of many dangers. Sharpteeth stalked the herds waiting to seize any who strayed.

We cut to a closeup of the nest of eggs.

NARRATOR
The leaf eaters stopped only to hatch their young.

And it’s just then that one begins to hatch, feet coming out first. A butterfly flutters right there and watches as the baby inside comes out, tail first, then head. This is Ducky. She is sweet and innocent looking and just pierces your heart. Curiously she looks up at the butterfly, laughs, and rolls down the hill, following it, still in her egg. She gets to her feet and chases it through a log, then  falls out of the end of it, losing the remainder of her shell. She then proceeds to chase a woodchuck, only to nearly land in the mouth of a turtle, only to be saved by her mother, who grabs her by the tail.

DUCKY
Ha, ha, ha. Mama.

Ducky’s mother takes her back to the nest…where her siblings have already hatched! Ducky nuzzles one of them affectionately.

8. Ext. Desert – Morning.

Now cut to a pair of triceratopses and their young ones, one of whom is still mostly---except for her feet---in her egg. She blindly bumps into her father’s leg, then into one of her siblings, and then finally butts her head her mother’s nose. She falls, but gets up again and does the same…that does the trick, she’s fully hatched! This is Cera.

NARRATOR
Some of the young seemed born without fear.

Cera’s father bends into the frame and looks at her. Cera glares at both her parents and rams her head into her mother’s nose, then her father’s. She falls and rubs her sore head. Suddenly there’s thunder. Rain begins to pour. Cera’s mother puts her arm comfortingly around her young one.

9. Ext. Swamp – Late Night

The dark night sky. Rain pours down relentlessly. We cut to the trio of apatasaurs we’ve seen twice now, drinking from a pond.

NARRATOR
All that remained of one herd was a mother, and her own parents.

We cut to a nest of eggs…or what remains of it. All but one egg is broken.

NARRATOR
They only had one last hope for the future.

The egg begins to move. Lightning flashes.

We suddenly cut to an eggstealer, a shadowy, slender, black lizard who eyes the egg, wrapped around the mother’s tail.

NARRATOR
Yet…even hatching could be dangerous.

In one sudden movement the eggstealer jumps into the water and grabs the egg. The mother tries to grab it back, but---it flies out of the eggstealers hands…

10. Ext. Muddy Hill – Night

…down a muddy hill…

11. Muddy Grass – Night

…through muddy grass…

12. Root covered ground – Night

…across this patch of ground…

13. Int. Stream – Night

…which it tumbles into …

14. Ext. Stream – Night

…where it briefly rises to the surface, before tumbling down a waterfall…

15. Ext. Clearing – Night

…where it finally comes to a stop in the middle of. We notice it’s stopped raining. A bunch of small lizards run away in fear. One brave one stays and catiously sniffs the egg---but it’s hatching, and it runs away too!

Now we see it happen…tail first…then hind legs…and the head and forefeet, on his head is the cutest baby apatasaur we’ve ever seen. He falls backwards, turns around, and smiles the cutest smile ever at us viewers.

Cut to the herd searching for their young one. Just as the mother looks like she’s lost hope, she pauses, and we see what she sees---her baby sitting there smiling in the middle of the clearing. A tear falls from the mother’s eye as she walks over to meet the miracle she gave birth to.

MOTHER (lovingly)
Oh, there you are!

The little apatasaur cringes in fear as his mother licks him clean.

MOTHER
Oh, don’t be frightened!

He perks up as she licks him and laughs, and then he licks her, too. They smile at each other. It’s truly heartwarming.

We cut to the young one’s grandparents, smiling. The grandfather bends down to look at the baby.

GRANDFATHER (placing his foot next to the little one’s)
Look how small his feet are! They’re smaller then one of my toes!

The mother bends down and looks into her child’s eyes.

MOTHER
Then you shall be called Littlefoot.

Littlefoot smiles, pleased at his new name. His mother picks him up by the tale and sets him on her back, where he lies down. The three adult longnecks all look on in happiness as he licks his lips and then falls to sleep.

LITTLEFOOT’S MOTHER (Affectionately, as if she could never live without him)
…beautiful Littlefoot.

FADE TO BLACK.


Justin1993

  • Member+
  • Ducky
  • *
    • Posts: 1613
    • View Profile
I'm pretty sure this belongs in the "Fanart and Fanfiction" section of the forum.

But anyways here are a few mistakes, suggestions, and insights.
Quote
creautures
creatures

Quote
...which are crushed by an enormous foot
That was actually a mouth. Unless you intended for it to be a foot instead, which I don't find too great.

Quote
swiiming
swimming

Quote
the python
I believe what was said here was "bison," unless this is an intentional change.

Quote
mastadon
mastodon

Quote
Heard
herd

Quote
NARRATOR
These great giants were of two kinds...some had flat teeth and some had sharp teeth.
I don't exactly like the way you changed this line. It seems empty without "...and ate the leaves of trees..." and "...for eating meat, and they preyed upon the leafeaters." I do like "These great giants..." however. Although a minor alteration I like is "Now, these giants..." in keeping with what the narrator says.
By the way, you have not introduced yourself properly and I insist that you do so at the Welcome Center section of the forum.


Almaron

  • Spike
  • *
    • Posts: 322
    • View Profile
If you're looking at reincorporating cut scenes into this script, I'd suggest you look at the Outcut Scenes page which lists a whole lot of scenes (some of which even have images) that have been discovered thanks to:

*Publicity Images
*Trailer Scenes
*Musical Cues From The Soundtrack
*Storybook Scenes

Some of the pictures can be seen in this amalgamated image (along with the links to the trailers - Deleted Scene Pics
), but I'd advise reading the page on the forum: Outcut Land Before Time Scenes

There's also my Soundtrack Analysis, which can be seen and read here:
First Analysis
Followup To Analysis
Better Written Verbal Analysis


Bruton the Iguanodon

  • Guest
Alright I'm back. Here goes.

FADE INTO...

16. Ext. Tree Filled Desert - Day

The small longneck herd stands in the middle of a treefilled clearing, but most, if not all, of the trees are bare. Grandfather plucks a branch off a tree and gives it too his grandson.

GRANDFATHER
Here you go, Littlefoot.

LITTLEFOOT (chewing on branch)
Mother, is this all there is to eat?

MOTHER
Oh, I'm so sorry, my dear. The land has been changing. That is why we must walk as far as we can each day...until we reach the great valley.

She suddenly stops in her tracks, face lightening up.

Cut to Littlefoot, still chewing on his sticks.

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER (exiktedly)
Littlefoot! Come quickly!

He hurries over to a clearing his mother is standing in. Right at the very top of one trees...clings a single green leaf. Cut to a closeup of this lasting miracle...

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER
Look, up there. A tree star. It is very special.

Slowly, she raises her neck and carefully brings the treestar down to the ground. Droplets of water splash from it.  

Littlefoot beams as he looks at this new sight.

LITTLEFOOT (wonderously)
...a treestar!

He plays with it, blowing it in the air and licking it effectionately.

Grandmother and Grandfather chuckle effectionately.

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER
Where we are going there are so many of these leaves. Come along.

Giggling, Littlefoot follows, carrying his treestar on his back.

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER
The great valley is filled with green food, more then you could ever eat, and more fresh, cool water then you could ever drink. It's a wonderful place, where we'll live happily with many more of our own kind.

LITTLEFOOT
Gee, it sounds amazing.

He pauses, his treestar falling off his back as he does.

LITTLEFOOT
Have you ever seen the great valley, mother?

She cranes her neck around and looks at him.

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER
No.

LITTLEFOOT
Well, then  how do you know it's really there.

His mother smiles.

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER
Some things you see with your eyes, others you see with your heart.

LITTLEFOOT (sighs)
I don't understand, mother.

She nuzzles him.

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER
You will, my son. You will.

Littlefoot smiles. He bends down to pick up his treestar when suddenly he hears a strange noise.

CUT TO:

17 - Clearing in Desert - Day

Littlefoot pokes his head through a patch of grass.

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER (O.S.)
Littlefoot, don't you wander too far.

We then see the source of the noise. Butting her head against her father's nose, is Cera. Her mother and sisters are a short distance away. Suddenly Cera sees a bug and chases after it. It lands on a rock. Cera grins, sure she's gonna get it...only to get sprayed in the face.

LITTLEFOOT
Ha, ha, ha!

Cera looks around, sees him and scowls at him.

CERA
What are you laughing at?

She then begins to charge at Littlefoot. Littlefoot in turn prepares to charge at her himself. The two run towards each other, when---

Suddenly Cera's father looks in their direction. In one swift movement he's between Cera and Littlefoot. Littlefoot comes to an abrupt halt. Cera's father growls menacingly at him.

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER  (O.S.)
Littlefoot!

CERA'S FATHER
Come, Cera...Threehorns never play with...

He glares at Littlefoot dsigustedly.

CERA'S FATHER
...long-necks.

CERA (to Littlefoot)
You heard! Three-horns never play with Long-necks!

Just then Littlefoot is picked up by the tail by his mother. She leads him away. Cera's father likewise does the same with her.

LITTLEFOOT
Hmm...Mother, what's a...longneck?

She sets him on her head.

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER
It's what we are, dear.

LITTLEFOOT
Why can't I play with that Threehorn? We were having fun!

LITTLEFOOTS MOTHER (sighs heavily)
Well...we all keep to our own kind. The threehorns, the bigmouths, the flyers, the spiketails. We never do anything together.

LITTLEFOOT
Why?

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER
Well...because we're different. It's always been that way.

LITTLEFOOT
But why?

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER
Oh, don't worry so much. When we reach the great valley, there will be many longnecks for you to play with.

LITTLEFOOT (sighs)
I wish we were there now.

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER
It's a long way, yes, but we'll get there.

That's all for now! Be back later. Can't wait...we're getting to the interesting stuff!


jansenov

  • Member+
  • Ducky
  • *
    • Posts: 2660
    • View Profile
Not much change here. Let's see what you'll come up next with.  :)


Mumbling

  • Administrator
  • Littlefoot
  • *
    • Posts: 9022
    • View Profile

Bruton the Iguanodon

  • Guest
Just to let you guys know, any changes or ommissions in my script, however small or subtle they are, aren't because I'm remembering the film wrong or anything---they're all concious choices of my decision, and if you are against any of them, feel free to write what you want---I won't take it too hard.

Alright, here goes.


FADE TO...

18. Ext. - Desert - Late Night
The four longnecks asleep, Littlefoot on his mother's head. A frog suddenly jumps onto his mother's head, waking him up. Just as suddenly---it hops away. Littlefoot, curious, gets off his mom's head and chases after the frog. Suddenly someone jumps in front of him---Cera.

CERA
That's MY hopper!

The two begin to chase it together, and end up turning in a different direction. The follow it into a...

19. Ext. Swamp - Late Night
...where it disapears into the mud.  

Littlefoot turns to go back when...

Cera splashes him.

LITTLEFOOT
Hey!

Grinning, he, too splashes Cera in the face.

Littlefoot apparently barely hears her, as he and Cera continue splashing.

We pan out to far away...

As we do the music grows darker...

And a shadow falls across the screen. Giant footsteps fall.

Littlefoot and Cera suddenly stop playing. Freeze in fear.

We then see what they see, stomping towards them through the muddy shallows.

Dark Green.
Ten meters tall.
Dark red eyes.
Sharp claws.
Mouth Drooling.
A Tyranasaurus!

Littlefoot and Cera run screaming through the pond screaming.

Cut back to the t-rex, his eyes vengeful and hungry.

And Littlefoot and Cera are certainly screaming it:

LITTLEFOOT AND CERA:
AHHH! SHARPTOOTH!

19 Ext. Desert - Dawn

Mama Longneck wakes from her slumber, groaning. She then realizes her son isn't on her head, and looks around frantically for him.

LITTLEFOOT'S MOTHER
Littlefoot? Where are you? Littlefoot?

We hear screams in the distance. A new fear suddenly comes over Mama Longneck's face as we cut to:

20. Int. Thorns -  Dawn
The two climb into a wood of thorned branches.

22. Ext. Thorns - Dawn
Sharptooth peers into the branches. Pokes his head in.

23. Int. Thorns - Dawn
He leans his head into the spiky woods, sniffing his prey.

Littlefoot and Cera bend down to avoid his enormous nose.

LITTLEFOOT
Let's go.

Slowly they move through the thorns.

CERA
This way.

She starts running down a different path then Littlefoot was taking.

LITTLEFOOT
Wait---you're going the wrong way!

The two run through the thorned woods, get out and only run into another one!


Immediately Sharptooth crashes into this new woods.


Littlefoot and Cera run for their lives. Littlefoot suddenly runs into some thorn covered vines. Still running for his life, they've got him trapped. And Sharptooth is right behind him!

Littlefoot manages to free himself.

Sharptooth isn't so lucky...the thorn covered branch hits him right in the eye!


jansenov

  • Member+
  • Ducky
  • *
    • Posts: 2660
    • View Profile
Quote from: Bruton the Iguanodon, Nov 2 2011 on  12:35 AM
Sharptooth---the meanest and most ferocious of all the sharpteethed dinosaurs! His name was feared by all.

I think this line is unnecessary. The scene and the backround music tell enough themselves. The sharptooth is a force of nature: intelligent, unrelenting, non-negotiable. None of the other villains from LBT have all three traits. Actually, he isn't a villain at all. There's no hatred or evil in his actions. The narrator's silence would tell more than words in this case. Or so I think.


Bruton the Iguanodon

  • Guest
23. Ext - Thorns - Dawn

Sharptooth stands at his full height, screaming in pain and rubbing his injured eye.

Sorry I haven't been at this so long...


Bruton the Iguanodon

  • Guest
I hope you'll be OK with the face that I've decided to shelve this. It just wasn't really going anywhere. There really is no LBT other than the one Bluth created. It's like people making the Harry Potter books into movies---they're changing stuff. This wasn't really original stuff, just nitpicking of a good movie. Sorry.


The Anonymous Person

  • Member+
  • Ducky
  • *
    • Posts: 1778
  • Guess who back? Back again?
    • View Profile
I absolutely agree with you, Bruton. There's nothing better than the original movie, give or take the changes that could have been made...oh well.