Funniest Quotes You've Heard

MrDrake · **Reply #420 on:** May 13, 2011, 06:33:04 PM

Wheatly: *there is no elevator to head to the next area* The elevator's out of service....because....it melted....
- Portal 2

Salvatore Blackheart · **Reply #421 on:** May 14, 2011, 08:41:55 PM

FUTURAMA
Quote
Bender: I'm going to build my own theme park! With blackjack! And %&$#!

vonboy · **Reply #422 on:** May 14, 2011, 11:43:13 PM

some other Futurama quotes

Professor: At Bender. "He's Flat-Lining! Only one thing can keep him alive!" Gets a doomsday device. "Possibly this thing!"

---------------

Professor: "Everyone get in bed with me. I have something to show you." everyone gets in bed. "Feast your eyes... on *this*!"

Everyone gasps.

Leela: "It's beautiful!"

Amy: "And huge!"

Fry: "Can I touch it?"

----------------------

Fry: "Well, usually on the show someone would come up with a complicated plan then explain it with a simple analogy."

Leela: "Hmm. If we can re-route engine power through the primary weapons and reconfigure them to Melllvar's frequency, that should overload his electro-quantum structure."

Bender: "Like putting too much air in a balloon!"

Fry: "Of course! It's so simple!"

(And then...a bit later)

Leela: "It's not working! He's drawing straight from our weapons."

Fry: "Like a balloon and...something bad happens!"

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #423 on:** May 16, 2011, 02:54:29 PM

PORTAL 2
Cave Johnson Quotes

"Alright let's get started! This first test involves something the lab boys call 'Repulsion Gel'. You're not part of the control group by the way. You get the gel. Last poor son-of-a-gun got blue paint. (Chuckles) All joking aside that did happen. Broke every bone in his legs. Tragic, but informative; or so I'm told."

"The lab boys have just informed me that I should NOT have mentioned the control group. They're telling me I 'atta stop making this pre-recorded messages. That gave me an idea: Make MORE pre-recorded messages. I paid the bills here I can talk about the control group all damn day!"

Lemon rant w/ GLaDOS reactions

Cave Johnson: Alright I've been thinking: When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade...

GLaDOS: Yeah!

CJ: ...make life TAKE the lemons BACK!

GLaDOS: Yeah!

CJ: GET MAD!!!

GLaDOS: Yeah!!!

CJ: I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these?!

GLaDOS: Yeah, take the lemons!

CJ: Demand to see Life's manager!

GLaDOS: Yeah!

CJ: Make life rue the day it thought it could give CAVE JOHNSON lemons!! DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?!?! I'm the man who's gonna BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN!!! With the lemons!!

GLaDOS: Oh I like this guy...

CJ: I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that BURNS YOUR HOUSE DOWN!!!

GLaDOS: Burn his house down!! He's saying what we're all thinking!!!

LBTDiclonius · **Reply #424 on:** June 06, 2011, 08:58:57 PM

From Soul Eater

Black Star: Does...this mean...we'll still be friends?

Soul: YOU IDIOT!!!! OF COURSE WE'LL STILL BE FRIENDS!!!

Black Star: *tears up*

Soul *starts running towards him, Baywatch style: Black Star!

Black Star *does the same* : Oh, Soul!

Soul: Black Star!

*Does the same thing above for a few more minutes*

Soul and Black star hug.

Maka: Okay, these guy's need some professional help.

Black Star and Soul start crying and hugging one another and then they randomly get shot.

Kid: ...My fingers slipped.

MrDrake · **Reply #425 on:** June 07, 2011, 05:11:17 AM

Tristian: My voice gives me super strength!
Kemo: Yes! But my hair gives me the power to defy gravity!

Kemo: Attention Duelists! My hair is being assulted!

Yugi: Wait, did you just summon a bunch of monsters in one turn?
Kaiba: Yeah, so?
Yugi: Isn't that against the rules?
Kaiba: Screw the rules! I have money!
- Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series

Allicloud · **Reply #426 on:** June 10, 2011, 01:58:37 PM

Mystery Science Theatre: The Movie-

Tom Servo: (Having blocked a hole in the hull of the spaceship with his hoverskirt) Hey, I'm experiencing a sensation altogether new to me... and frankly, I LOVE IT!!!

All: (After a character in the film orders the screen set to "nomal view", cue dramatic music) nooorrrmalll vieeeeww, noooorrrmaaaall viiieew, NORRRMAL VIEWWWW, NOOOOORRRRRMMMMMMMMMAL VIIIIEEEEEWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!1

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #427 on:** June 10, 2011, 05:23:38 PM

Kung Fu Panda 2

Lord Shen: (Threatening Po) The only reason you're still alive... is because I find your stupidity mildly amusing.
-----------------------------------
Lord Shen: Call in the wolves! All of them! I want them ready to move! The Year of the Peacock begins now!

Wolf Boss: Right now? 'Cause its the middle of the year, so you'd only get, like, half of the Year of the Peacock.

Lord Shen: (brandishes a blade)

Wolf Boss: Ahem, this is the Year, of course, of the Peacock. Happy New Year, sir!

Ptyra · **Reply #428 on:** June 10, 2011, 06:03:21 PM

Groucho: Once I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How it got in my pajamas, I don't know.

Marx Brothers...as if you couldn't tell by "Groucho"...

2007excalibur2007 · **Reply #429 on:** June 11, 2011, 12:41:20 AM

MLP:FiM - "Over A Barrel"

Rainbow Dash: When we get to Appleoosa, you think we have to carry that heavy tree all the way from the train to the orchard?
Pinkie Pie: What tree? You mean Bloomberg?
Rainbow Dash: ...no. Fluttershy. (/sarcasm)
Pinkie Pie: Fluttershy's not a tree, silly.
...
Twilight: What's going on?
Pinkie Pie: Rainbow Dash thinks Fluttershy's a tree.
Rainbow Dash: I do not think she's a tree, I was just--
Twilight: Did you say she was a tree?
Rainbow Dash: No! Well, yes, but... not exactly--
Twilight: You know she's not a tree, right?
Pinkie Pie: Well she's not a tree, Dashie!
...
Fluttershy: I'd like to be a tree.

MrDrake · **Reply #430 on:** June 11, 2011, 02:52:02 AM

Tea: Look! I think something exciting's happening
Yami: Blah, blah, card games blah
Pegasus: Blah, blah, blah, attack mode blah
Yami: Blah, blah, blah?
Pegasus: Blaaaah!
Tea: Ooops, my mistake
- Yu-Gi-Oh: The Abridged Series

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #431 on:** June 13, 2011, 12:24:30 AM

Kung Fu Panda 2

"I never had any problems my dad. Maybe that's because Mom ate his head before I was born."
-Mantis-

MrDrake · **Reply #432 on:** June 19, 2011, 07:38:15 AM

Croquet: Everyone who has been working on the Egyptian God Cards is dead
Pegasus: *gasps* Even Chad from Accounting?
*cut to man being thrown out window*
Croquet: Especially Chad from Accounting
- Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #433 on:** June 19, 2011, 10:55:15 PM

Kung Fu Panda 2
-That Shen/Po exchange we all love-

Shen: The only reason you're still alive is because I find your stupidity... mildly amusing.

Po: Why thank you, and I find your evilness extremely annoying!

Shen: Who do you think you are, Panda?

Po: Who do YOU think I am, Peacock?

(BOTH LAUGH)

Po: ...Why are we laughing?

Blitz · **Reply #434 on:** June 20, 2011, 01:22:30 AM

The Brave Little Toaster

The Radio: Boy, are we glad to see you!

Lampy: Yeah. I really thought I'd turned in my warranty that time.

The Radio: Until baggy here showed up!

Kirby: I just slipped and fell in. That's all.

Lampy: [laughing] Oh, yeah, sure, right.

Blanky: You can't fool us. We love you.

The Radio: That's right, like Mrs. Roosevelt loved her husband.

Kirby: Yeah, yeah. Well, here's the shore. Everybody off.

The Radio: Listen to this! This is President Roosevelt awarding the vaccum the medal of honor!

[Radio places a leaf on Kirby's face, but Kirby blows it off, and everyone laughs]

MrDrake · **Reply #435 on:** June 20, 2011, 01:43:21 AM

Homer: "Knife goes in, guts come out, Knife goes in, guts come out, Knife goes in, guts come out, Knife goes in, guts come out....."
- The Simpsons

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #436 on:** June 24, 2011, 12:09:08 AM

Kung Fu Panda 2

"D'you see that? That's called being awesome."
-Po-

-----------
*Po and Five gets captured by Wolf Army*
Crane: You can chain my body; but you'll never chain my- *Neck gets chained* -warrior spirit.
------------

"Fear the bug!"
-Mantis-

Blitz · **Reply #437 on:** June 24, 2011, 12:37:55 AM

Air Conditioner: What is it with you guys, anyway? You act like you just came off the assembly line! Now get this through your chrome. We've been dumped! Abandoned!
Blanky: But he loved us.
The Radio: That's right.
Air Conditioner: So what? He's a kid. He has a family. They move away, he moves away. It's a packaged deal.
Toaster: But maybe they're...
Air Conditioner: He's not coming back! Pure and simple!
Kirby: Oh yeah? Did you talk to him recently or something? They could drive up any second!
Blanky: You really think so?
Kirby: I'm not talking to you!

- The Brave Little Toaster

MrDrake · **Reply #438 on:** June 24, 2011, 01:39:10 AM

Joey: Did you really think I was that stupid to do something like that?
Marik: *rather quickly* YES!
- Yu-Gi-Oh!

Belmont2500 · **Reply #439 on:** June 24, 2011, 01:43:01 AM

Big Rigs:Over The Road Racing(AKA The Worst Game Of All Time):

"YOU'RE WINNER*