Funniest Quotes You've Heard

LBTDiclonius · **Reply #380 on:** February 05, 2011, 02:19:44 PM

MrDrake · **Reply #381 on:** February 12, 2011, 06:24:43 AM

Todd: Okay this is really creeping me out. My TV just exploded.
Nicky: Your damn right it exploded!... I mean really?
- Little Nicky

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #382 on:** February 13, 2011, 03:39:46 PM

The Simpsons "Mom and Pop Art"

Homer: Yeah... that's one fine looking barbecue pit.

*Lowers picture of barbecue pit to reveal a bunch of bricks, cement, and junk*

Homer: WHY DOESN'T MINE LOOK LIKE THAT?!?!?!?!

*Homer screams in frustration and rage; then picks up a crowbar and smashes the pile of junk*

Homer: WHY? WHY MUST LIFE BE SO HARD?! WHY MUST I FAIL AT EVERY ATTEMPT AT MASONRY?!?!?!?!

*meanwhile*

Marge: How's your father's project coming along?

Bart: I think he's almost done.

*Homer charges the junk pile with an umbrella*

Homer: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bart: Yeah, he's done.

MrDrake · **Reply #383 on:** February 28, 2011, 08:24:21 PM

Doctor Doom: *after winning a battle* The applause shall continue for another hour. The first person to stop clapping shall be executed.

Spider-Man: *in regards to Wesker* You may have great power Albert, but you're not very responsible

Hulk: *calling in Ammeratsu to tag himself out* Dog!
- Marvel vs Capcom 3

F-14 Ace · **Reply #384 on:** March 03, 2011, 07:27:05 PM

From Family Guy...

Captain Kirk: Alright men, this is a dangerous mission and its likely that one of us will be killed. The landing party will myself, Mr. Spock, Dr. McCoy, and Ensign Ricky.

Ensign Ricky: Aww crap!

MrDrake · **Reply #385 on:** March 08, 2011, 08:47:17 PM

Bender: You may have to metaphorically make a deal with the devil. And by "devil", I mean the Robot Devil. And by "metaphorically" I mean get your coat.
- Futurama

vonboy · **Reply #386 on:** March 08, 2011, 10:41:02 PM

a few zapp brannigan quotes from futurama

"Your a brave robot, son, but when i'm in command, every mission's a suicide mission!

"you win again gravity!"

"Nothing remains now but for the captain to go down with his ship"
Kiff: "Why, that's surprisingly noble of you sir!"
"No, it's noble of you, Kiff! As of now, your the new captain!"

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #387 on:** March 09, 2011, 08:39:32 PM

Scott Pilgrim vs the World

Kim: Where's Knives? Not coming tonight?

Scott: No we broke up. Check this out, I learned the bass line from Final Fantasy 2.
*Plays bass line*

Everyone Else: :blink:

Kim: Scott you are the salt of the earth.

Scott: Thanks. *Keeps playing*

Kim: ...I meant scum of the earth.

Scott: Thanks. *Keeps playing*

MrDrake · **Reply #388 on:** March 11, 2011, 01:18:35 AM

Dean: There's Sam Girls and Dean Girls and... What's a slash fan?
Sam: As in Sam slash Dean. Together.
Dean: Like together, together? They do know we're brothers, right?
Sam: Doesn't seem to matter.
Dean: Oh, come on, that... that's just sick!
- Supernatural

Allicloud · **Reply #389 on:** March 11, 2011, 02:49:00 PM

Being a fan of the Nostalgia Critic has exposed me to many a hilarious line, including my favourite from Suburban Commando:

"CHRIST! I WAS FROZEN TODAY!"

vonboy · **Reply #390 on:** March 15, 2011, 09:39:53 PM

A line used in almost every other episode of Mystbusters

"Now there's you're problem!"

LBTDiclonius · **Reply #391 on:** March 15, 2011, 10:11:33 PM

From the tv show, iCarly,

Carly: What would Knug-Knug from Galaxy Wars be doing here in Seattle?

Spencer: Hugging me!

Belmont2500 · **Reply #392 on:** March 17, 2011, 10:53:00 PM

Any Jerry Lewis quote.

MrDrake · **Reply #393 on:** March 22, 2011, 02:25:11 AM

Zombies: The zombies....they're coming....
- Plants vs. Zombies (Yes, they do say that in the game at the start of a level

)

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #394 on:** March 22, 2011, 06:06:39 PM

Simpsons Movie

Bart: Dad, it's not fair to use a bug zapper to catch the fish.

Homer: Bart, if you love fish like I do then you'd want them to die with dignity.

Daddytops2009 · **Reply #395 on:** March 24, 2011, 04:09:40 PM

Paddy: You were relocated to re-populate.
Kate: Ah!
Humphrey: Oh, sounds good to me.
[Kate puts her paw under Humphrey's chin]
Kate: No

vonboy · **Reply #396 on:** March 24, 2011, 08:56:19 PM

Bender: "You know, sometimes I wish your parents were still alive." Pauses. "Not often though." Hugs Fry.

Cancerian Tiger · **Reply #397 on:** March 26, 2011, 03:16:31 AM

From an episode of The Three Stooges:

Curly: "Hey! I've got a great idea in the back of my head!"

Moe: "Oh yeah! Well, how 'bout bringin' it up front?!"

*Pops Curly on the back of the head*

Spartanguy88 · **Reply #398 on:** March 28, 2011, 05:28:28 PM

Red vs Blue

*Tex fights the Reds and Tucker. At one point it looks like Tex is about to kill Grif with a shotgun... until it's revealed that it has no ammo.*

Sarge: Private Grif; you should be ashamed of yourself. We're fried on ammo again! That's YOUR responsibility!

Grif: Huh. I guess this is the first time my laziness has ever actually saved my-

*Tex puts a boot on Grif's gut, then prepares to use the shotgun as a golf club*

Grif: *Vainly holds up a traffic cone* PROTECT ME CONE!!!!

F-14 Ace · **Reply #399 on:** March 29, 2011, 03:37:03 PM

From Spaceballs.

Computer: This is your last chance to push the cancellation button.
Skroob: "Cancellation button?" Hurry!
Dark Helmet: Where is it? Where is it?
Colonel Sandurz: It's gotta be here!
[They open a housing, where the button has an "Out of Order" tag on it.]
Dark Helmet: Out of order?! ****! Even in the future, nothing works!