A big problem for me is that I’m never sure of how much I can criticize (constructively, of course

) someone before I start to annoy them, or how much I can compliment someone before I start to sound flattering and insincere. At the risk of sounding braggartish (I always worry that I sound like I’m bragging whenever I say something positive about myself

), I’m a very honest person; I don’t like to lie, and when I do I almost always feel guilty about it later. But if I were completely blunt and open all the time, I’d probably get a lot of people mad at me, and that’s something I definitely don’t want. Generally what I do to avoid getting on other people’s nerves when I compliment or criticize them is to offer them a little bit of both, often directly informing them of my sincerity and helpful intentions if I feel my compliments are too gushy or my nitpicking too severe. Of course, I’m
always paranoid that my compliments and criticisms are too much, and often I worry that my paranoia itself is irritating to peopleóAaargh!

: No wonder I’m such a lousy socializer!
